In this cycle a reminisee: Madhavikutty aka Kamala Suraiyya

Well, it was a pretty hectic cycle, this month, between, desire, dreams, and the does.....Had my examination, which has been part of my life cycle, for more than a decade now, every six month, coinciding with the new cylce of work, having changed the entire routine of the daily cylce...so this week end, decided to keep for myself listening to good old hindi music, which soothens, and going through the events of the months, of which I had literally no clue...at home, and around... Father had come to meet me all the way, during last weekend, but could not meet. My first cousins engagement is almost fixed, and everyone was busy with it, at home, and then the well work...mother tensed more than usual....and tempered ....for her children...and being a mother to more people, more the tension ....of her own and others..... One thing that kept comming to my mind during the week was the death and life of Madhavikutty aka Kamala Suraiyya an Indian writer who wrote in English and Malayalam ......Was her writings the middle age syndrome effect? Her writings and life was indeed a question mark, was it because she wanted more publicity, and was feeling less recognised, I dont know....Born in a conservative Hindu family, she embraced Islam in 1999 at the age of 65. Even after that, she had said, Guruvayoor Krishnan is with me....what she wanted to convey was though not very clear... Though she was born to Nalappatt Balamani Amma, a renowned Malayali poetess, and her uncle, Nalappatt Narayana Menon, was a prominent writer she did not start writing professionally until she got married and became a mother. She wrote chiefly of love, its betrayal, and the consequent anguish. There was sourness in her writing, even directly, I remember having read a poem by her, with malayalam words, Kayapa....At the age of 42, she published her autobiography, My Story or Ende kadha....Then she was Kamala Das...I remember she having said, a decade ago, only 4 people know my mob no..three sons and....?? Well then there was the talks about Obamas, say no to Banglore, yes to Buffalloo, IT and BPO industries moving to Phillippine...the econcomic recession....stock market fluctuations.... If there are two ones, a big one and a small one, how can you make the two equal? Do not cut the big one, but increase the size of the small one, that is growth.... Desire what you deserve, desire is the route cause of all sorrow....dont work hard, dont work smart, work with your heart....