Family

Though was brought up in a small flat, in a metro; we always had some or the other members from our extended family with us; in our nuclear family; and with father always telling us stories of his childhood, and mother wanting to visit her parents and native land; it was my childhood dream to find a job in our native land when grown up. It was a time when there were not many job opportunities in Kerala, and people used to go out of Kerala in search of job. When my mother would ask me how will I find a job in Kerala, I would say, somebody has promised me. She was pussled and wanted to know who it was? On lot of persistence - I finally would say, well 'G' has promised me. So the discussion would continue on who the 'G' was.

Our family was large, both on my father and mothers side.

My father had 7 siblings, he had brothers - one elder and one younger than him, and 5 sisters - 2 elder and 3 younger than him. Between them they had 21 children. His youngest sister, and elder sisters daughter were almost of the same age. My mother with her 4 siblings - was the first to have child in her family; so I was the darling of my maternal grandparents. Especially on my mother’s side my grandmother was very close to her eight siblings, and therefore with her. Their father had passed away when they were young, and it was their mother, who had no siblings, brought them up. They were very closely netted family. Between my grandfather and his three siblings, there were again many relatives who lived around their small house. My normally stern grandfather, was a terror but very loving. So also my Paternal grandparents. Very interesting. My grandfather had his siblings in Ernakulam, and he worked in forest. While grandmother had acres of land. It was fun to go around the places, litting dried coconut leaves.

Not from a very rich family, we had our tough times, but days went on, with fights and reconcilations being part of daily life. With passing time, we moved to Kerala. I completed my studies, and got a job in 'God's own Country', as desired.

But saw the huge families drifting apart. Now as I do not have any of my grandparents around, and even my father I ponder on the life gone by. About the Child who did not have time or interest to have food with his mother even once during her last 10 years, but was there to conduct all her last rituals, of a brother who had to die in an orphanage, and another who was drawned in the village pond. Were these something avoidable?

Why blame others for misunderstandings and quarrels? Cancer is in the body and mind...For the India and Pakistan quarrell is England to be blamed? Is this what I really wanted? What could be done by one singe soul? What is the goal that I could find?