Everyone is talking about Jamie

Inspired by the true story of Jamie Campbell, a gay, British teenager who was forbidden by his school from wearing a dress to his prom, directed by Jonathan Butterell (in his feature directorial debut) from a screenplay by Tom MacRae based on the stage musical of the same name, starring Max Harwood with Sarah Lancashire, Lauren Patel, Shobna Gulati, Ralph Ineson, Adeel Akhtar, Samuel Bottomley, Sharon Horgan, and Richard E. Grant is a comming of the age movie. Hubby dear was emotional watching this and got me to see it. 

Max and Saraha.

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https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Everybody%27s_Talking_About_Jamie_(film)

In Sheffield, South Yorkshire, England, Jamie New is turning sixteen years old. He lives with his single mother Margaret, is the only openly gay kid at school and is frequently bullied because of it. His only friend is Pritti Pasha, also harassed for being Muslim. At school, Year 11 instructor Miss Hedge admonishes the class about having unrealistic career goals, instead wanting to be YouTubers and entertainers. Jamie pretends to agree with her, but secretly he dreams of being a drag queen ("Don't Even Know It"). He admits that he wants to be a performer, but Hedge tells the kids she wants to prepare them for the real world.

Margaret goes to see her best friend Ray to help her prep everything for Jamie's birthday party. Pritti is unable to attend, and at the last minute, Jamie's estranged father Wayne messages Margaret to say he's not going to show up. Jamie arrives and Margaret covers that Wayne couldn't come because of a work emergency, and she gives him a card she lies is from him. Margaret presents Jamie a pair of expensive red high heels that he's been wanting and saving up money for – his first pair. Jamie is disappointed about his father's absence and reminisces about their strained relationship ("Wall in My Head").

At school, Jamie shows Pritti the heels and confesses his desire to be a drag superstar. Pritti is unsure of how she feels about it. Class bully Dean Paxton comes over and insults Jamie and Pritti for their differences, until Jamie fires back with his own retorts. Dean departs and Pritti tells Jamie that he should wear the shoes to prom and be the drag queen he wants to be ("Spotlight").

Margaret goes to see Wayne at his new girlfriend Cheryl's place, and admonishes him for not showing up for Jamie at all on his sixteenth birthday and for not even reaching out. Wayne tells her to stop lying to Jamie then, informing her that Cheryl is pregnant and he's having another boy, that Jamie doesn't need him anymore. He urges her to tell Jamie the truth and to move on with her life.

Jamie finds a drag shop, House of Loco, where he intends to find his first dress. Pritti walks him to the door but tells him he needs to go in on his own, where he finds the shopkeeper Hugo Battersby, who is shocked how young Jamie is. He counsels Jamie on finding his drag persona, explaining that putting on drag gives you power, pointing to a walled photo of drag queen Loco Chanelle. He asks why Jamie wants to be a drag queen, and Jamie explains how it's all he wants to do and has to make it happen. Hugo is thrilled until Jamie reveals his plan to go to prom in drag in six weeks. Hugo reveals he was Loco Chanelle, or used to be, and that his past was filled with a loving drag family that was destroyed when the AIDS epidemic ravaged the community and claimed the life of musician and icon Freddie Mercury ("This Was Me"). Saddened, Jamie leaves.

Jamie tells Pritti that being a drag queen is so much more than just dressing up. Pritti tells Jamie he needs to carry on the legacy, and Jamie and Pritti return to the shop and tell Hugo that Jamie is in. Hugo is excited, has a great dress for Jamie (once Jamie can afford it), and books Jamie a show at drag club Legs Eleven. Meanwhile, Margaret tells Ray about Wayne, and Ray urges Margaret to tell Jamie the truth. Returning home, Jamie excitedly tells them about his show and his plan to go to prom in drag. Although shocked, Margaret continues to support Jamie and tells him how proud she is. He suggests inviting Wayne, and Margaret tells Jamie she'll ask him, knowing full well that Wayne would never support it. Jamie goes upstairs and Margaret sadly admits that she couldn't break Jamie's heart.

Jamie picks up shifts at Ray's bakery and at a nearby convenience store to pay for the dress. At school, Jamie beckons Pritti into the bathroom where he reveals he has accidentally given himself a bad eyebrow job in an attempt to practice. Pritti tries to remedy it but Hedge catches them. Pritti claims it's for an art project, and Hedge says she doesn't want Jamie ruining Pritti's future. When Jamie retorts that at least he has a future, Hedge orders him to return to class with his makeup intact ("Work of Art"). When Jamie arrives in art class, his classmates ridicule him, and he responds by telling them about his drag show, determined not to be shamed ("Work of Art (Reprise)")

After school, Dean calls out Jamie, intending to go to the show and embarrass him. Jamie goes to Legs Eleven and expresses second thoughts, but Hugo surprises him as Loco Chanelle and stops Jamie from leaving. Jamie still doesn't have a drag name, is terrified of Dean and feels he can't do the show. Loco and the other queens give Jamie a makeover ("Over the Top"). Margaret and Ray, along with Dean and his friends, arrive and Margaret sends Jamie flowers that she signs as being from Wayne, which Jamie is thrilled to receive. Just before he goes on, Loco demands Jamie tell him his drag name, and Jamie responds "It's about me. Me. Me!" Loco introduces Jamie as "Mimi Me". Just as Mimi goes out onstage, Pritti arrives. Mimi performs a lip sync number – Dean and the boys heckle him during but are escorted out, and Mimi finishes the number in style.

The next day at school, Year 11 is abuzz about the drag show ("Everybody's Talking About Jamie"). Jamie arrives to class late in dramatic fashion and with make-up, which Hedge orders him to remove, and Jamie refuses. Hedge sends Jamie to the principal, and Dean comes to harass him while he waits. Hedge comes to stop them, and Dean vows he'll never go to prom if Jamie shows up in a dress, leaving school. At a meeting with Principal Masood, Hedge says Jamie can't wear a dress to prom because it's a distraction to the other kids. She says Jamie is a student at the school, not Mimi. Jamie leaves in a huff.

At Pritti's house, Jamie is still upset, but Pritti wants to know why Mimi needs to go to the prom. Jamie says without Mimi, he's ugly, and Pritti says he's stunning and that in Arabic, his name means beautiful ("It Means Beautiful"). Newly confident, Jamie goes to visit Wayne to thank him for the flowers, but Wayne tells Jamie his mother's been lying and that he's done with him.

Jamie returns home, furious at Margaret for lying to him. Margaret is sewing Jamie's dress and Jamie tries to take it from her – it rips. He tells Margaret she ruins everything and to stop trying to live through his life because she doesn't have one. He storms off and Margaret, alone, laments how, despite everything, she loves Jamie and he's her life ("He's My Boy"). Jamie, in an angry and confused downward spiral, gets drunk and sneaks into a local sports game that Wayne is attending, going onto the field in partial drag. He is harassed and physically shoved off the field. Wayne does nothing, instead going back to his seat. Beaten and bloody, Jamie goes to House of Loco, where Hugo fixes him up and informs him he has so much ahead of him.

Jamie comes home and apologizes to Margaret for what he said to her, and she apologizes in return for lying. He asks Margaret if she wishes he was normal, and Margaret insists he is normal and has done nothing wrong. She says she's sorry for Wayne because he's the one who is missing out ("My Man, My Boy"). On prom night, Year 11 prepare for the event. Pritti arrives in makeup and Dean unleashes his cruelty, but this time Pritti stands up to him and points out that tomorrow she'll begin the rest of her life, and he'll be nothing. Dean tries to save face, claiming Pritti can't even get a prom date. At that moment, however, Jamie arrives in a beautiful dress (but not in drag, as himself in a dress).

Hedge admonishes Jamie, that he was not to come in drag, but Jamie didn't come as Mimi, he came as himself in a dress. Hedge says he won't ruin it for the others, but his classmates rally and show their support. Jamie accepts the decision and begins to leave but the kids say if Miss Hedge doesn't let Jamie in, they won't go in. Jamie tells Hedge he's come as himself, as the real Jamie, and Hedge relents and tells Jamie he can go in.

Everyone goes inside but Jamie stops when he sees Dean standing outside by himself. Dean says Pritti is right, and Jamie implores Dean to come in and do a nice thing before it's all over. He leads Dean by the hand back into the dance, and Dean apologizes to Pritti, who accepts. The company celebrates their coming together and supporting each other ("Out of the Darkness (A Place Where We Belong)").

How to stop self-sabotaging : Thaddeus Lawrence

 There are only two ways things happen:

·        Thing happen to you – you are a victim

·        Things are created by you – you are a champion

You are responsible for creating. Be a Champion.

Life is like a multi day ultramarathon. 

Everyday you need to get up and do it again, and be better. Be closer to the finish line.

Thaddeus Lawrence is one among few who is part of the 'Four Desert clubs'.

Principals of success in every race is almost the same.

Mindsets are transferable and are universal.

Racing world to real world.

·        First principal is to get to the finish line , you have to get past your start line. - In a car you cannot get anywhere unless you ignite.

·       Why?

1.      What is compelling about this goal? From I can’t to compelling reason to do

2.      What drives you?  - Intellectual don’t move, Integral moves.

3.       What if I were’nt trying to prove to anything to ANYONE INCLUDING MYSELF? – Proving to Purpose.

What?

4.      Are my goals in harmony? Black and white to Multi-coloured

 Is it an attraction or in alignment to me? Attraction to alignment

 Do you have the right mix of challenge and capability? Freeze to flow – Not easily but with ease. Easy you will be bored, and difficult it will be stressful.

 How?

Discipline to Distinction:  What distinction am I creating for myself? 

Willpower to Environment:? Does my environment set me up for success

Big to Small: What is that one small step for me today?

8.       

We.....

Born with a knot to Mother ,

Cut to be free with mother nature,

As free as the wind blow,

As free as the grass grow,

As free as the waves flow,

We are fortunate to be.

Live and grow with your gut,

When they say use your head and heart,

To Desire or not,

To Dream or not,

To Do or not,

We have choices to make.

Love all around you, 

Create memories to cherish,

May your goals come true, 

May achievers inspire you,

May beauty surround you,

We grow and learn.

Not having all the time in the world,

One life that we remember,

Teach others all you learn,

Teach others leave a legacy,

Teach others for a better world,

We have lot more to do.

Stages of Scaling your Business - Rajiv Talreja – Lead or Blead – How to run a business without you

Stages of scaling your business

How to scale your business?

Stages of Building your business

 

1.      Struggle – Unclear & Wishful business model; Focus on acquiring customers, constant investment - Rejection, credibility,

2.      Survival – Customer/product and price point when you understand its workable business model, cash flow challenges because they are waiting for the customer to come to them, only financial planning - Understand feedback of the market

3.      Stability – You build a profitable business model. How? Business owner drives the functions in different department, - when marketing, sales, operations start consistently, that’s

when business become profitable. – Business owner is proactive. There is consistency of activity. Even this is a trap, because though you start making income, business is depended on you. You are stuck in the trap of Self-employment; you create job and pay but you are doing the job of your team member.

4.      Success – Rapid Financial Growth, Functional Heads drive business, Owner independence, owner focuses on strategic growth, Success is not the end. You enjoy life through the journey.

5.      Scale – You don’t manage – you have a management team – there is sytem driven growth. That is where you create legacy, that will live beyond you.

The transition from one stage to another depends on the efforts you make.

1 to 2 is understanding customer, product and pricing. 2 to 3 is becoming proactive. 3 to 4 is building second line managers. 4 to 5 is building systems and management.

How fast you can do that, is how fast you will grow.  Instead of blaming the world, be the seeker.

 When you lean the skills, you accelerate the business. Which stage is your business?

Some are in two stages – why?

Because some departments are grown while others have not.

The game is a journey, the faster you learn, the faster you grow. When you learn, you grow, when you grow, your business grow.

 

How Successful People Think - Change your thinking, Change your life: John C Maxwell

My first full audio book, and 93rd of 2021 was How Successful People Think - Change your thinking, Change your life: John C Maxwell

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RjoJAHcGcP0

INTRODUCTION  

• Are you already doing good thinking?
• Changed thinking is difficult. - Only dandruff is on top of your head. Thinking is handwork, so few people do it.
• Changed thinking is a worthy investment - Human mind able to think well is a mine. 

To improve thinking:

1. Expose yourself to good inputs. What you put in comes out. Spend time with good thinkers and read good books, keep it in front of you 
2. Expose yourself to good thinkers. Sharp people sharpens one another. 
3. Choose to think good thoughts. Become intentional about the thinking process. Make it a priority. Have a thinking place, and write it down. 
4. Act on your good thoughts . Think things through and follow through.
5. Don't wait until you feel like thinking to do it. Use emotions to create mental momentum. 
6. Repeat the process. One good thought does not make a good life. Have a mine and not sit on one nugget. 

To discover and develop good thoughts:

1. Find a place to think/create your thoughts - for some it's spa, shower, car, garden, bed anywhere it could be. Then thoughts will find place in you.
2. Find a place to shape your thoughts - Stand the test of clarity and questioning. Fine tune them. Learning to write is learning to think. 
3. Find a place to stretch your thoughts - Don't take seed thought to solution, without discussing with others, good to have a team. The right thought+people+environment+time = right result
4. Fine a place to land your thoughts - Great ideas need landing gears and wings.  Land your idea first with yourself. Before teaching ask Do I believe it, leave it and want others to believe it? No idea will fly if the influencers will not take it. 
5. Find a place to fly your thoughts 

Skills need for thinking are the chapters which tell how to think, some you do well others you don't, shared thinking will compensate for week area:

1. CULTIVATE BIG-PICTURE THINKING: Become a good listener. Listening will help you grow. People recognize they don't know lot of things. Will help you know other persons perspective. It will help you live with wholeness. They expand their experience and world. They become tolerant. This will allow you 1) to lead see the vision before the people do , help people be good and show them where to go. Help connect future to past to make a meaningful journey. Finest hour of a persons life, is the moment when he realise why he was born. 2) Keeps you on target: Have focus, 3) See what others see. 4) Promotes team work 5) You will not be caught up in the mundane. 6) Chart, uncharted territory. Look beyond the immediate. How to acquire this wisdom? Keep in mind 1) Don't strive for certainty. Be okay with ambiguity. Be able to deal with complex and diverse idea 2) Learn from every experience - success and failure, be teachable. 3) Gain insight from a variety of people, be selective. 4) Give yourself permission to expand your world. Don't be in boxes or married to status co. Find new worlds to conquer. When your world gets bigger celebrate. Keep learning, growing. Thinking questions: Am I thinking beyond myself to be wholistic? 
2. ENGAGE IN FOCUSED THINKING  : He did each thing as he did nothing else is was said of Charles Dickenson. It removed distraction and mental clutter. It will help 1) Harness energy to desired goal. 2) Gives ideas time to develop. Be selective and not expansive. 3) Brings clarity to the target 4) Will take you to the next level. - Leadership, creativity, communication and networking are the priorities, where author apply focused thinking. Found based on strength, return, joy, exceptional opportunity. Charlie Brown - Immediate goal. Develop your dream. How can you stay focused? 1) Remove distractions - practice priorities, eat the frog; insulate yourself from distractions,  2) Make time for focused thinking - don't multi task. Focus on one task at a time. 3) Keep items of focus/concentration before you. 4) Set Goals. - Written. Gives direction. They should be clear, close, helpful. 5) Question your progress - Find one thing you do well, and don't do anything else. 10-80-10 principles, be in the beginning and end - put cherry on the top. Be well rounded. be willing to give up some of the thing you love . Am I dedicated to remove clutter to concentrate on real issues?
3. HARNESS CREATIVE THINKING : Creativity is pure gold. It's not original thinking, its composite of other thoughts that comes along the way. Characteristics of Creative thinker are, they value ideas, they don't relay on talent alone, are disciplined. They explore options. They embrace ambiguity. They celebrate offbeat path, is able to make connections. Think - collect - create - connect. They don't fear failure. Creativity = Failure. It needs willingness to look stupid. 5 specific things that creative thinking can do 1) It adds value to everything, See what all have seen, do what no body had done, 2) It compounds giving time and focus. 3) Draws people to you and your idea. 4) Helps to learn more, have options. It's teach ability. 5) It challenge the status quo. How to discover the joy of creative thinking? 1) Remove creativity killers  - ask questions, be different, be foolish, know there are different ways, 2) Ask right questions - If you don't ask why this, someone will ask why you? 3) Develop a creative environment . Risks failure. Trusts come from there. Nurture the nuts. Energy , ideas and laughter would be around you and there will be inventions and innovations. Dreams give power, goals give focus. 4) Spend time with other creative people. It's contagious. 5) Get out of your box. Read. People need not be born, it can be created. Am I be wiling to break out of the box and be creative? 
4. EMPLOY REALISTIC THINKING  - First job of a leader is to define reality. Difference between what we wish and what is. Optimistic people might not feel a need, but it will add value 1) minimize downside risks - you can plan for worst scenario. 2) gives you a target and game plan. Hope is not a strategy. 3) It's a catalyst for change. 4) Provides security 5) Gives you credibility. 6) Provides a foundation to build on by taking over the wish factor. 7)  Friend to those in trouble. - dealing with failure if it happens - it gives something concrete. 8) Brings dream to fruitation. - How to realize the importance of realistic thinking? 1) Develop appreciation for truth - it will first make you angry and then set you free 2) Do your homework , your cant think in the absence of facts, it need not be original, but should be solid. 3) Think through the pros and cons. 4) Picture the worst case scenario. 5) Align your thinking with your resources. Am I building foundation on facts with certainty? 
5. UTILIZE STRATEGIC THINKING - Most people spend time planning their summer vacation than their life. Plan your life, live your plan. have time for thinking, writing, entertainment, travel, and time for unexpected. Help maximize strength, benefits are numerous. 1) Simplifies the difficult. Simplify the management of everyday life. 2) Prompts you to ask right question - direction, organization, cash, refinement, etc.  3) Prompts customization - 4) Prepares today for uncertain tomorrow 5) Reduces the margin of error. 6) influence with others - One with plan is one with power Guidelines to practice : 1) Break down the issue - how you do it does not matter, doing it matter. 2) Ask why before how - 3) Identify the real issues and objectives. Remove personal agenda 4) Review your resources. 5) Develop your plan. Start with the obvious. Obvious elements build mental momentum. Build on the fundamentals. 6) Put the right people in the right place. Look what happens if you miscalculate. Person, place and plan need to be right. 7) Keep repeating the process. It's like showering. Am I implementing strategic plan to increase my potential for tomorrow? 
6. EXPLORE POSSIBILITY THINKING -  It increase your possibility - Embarrassing to see others do what you said, cannot be done. It will draw possibility and people to you. It increases others possibilities. It allows you to dream big dreams. Your dreams will grow from mole hill to mountain. It will help you rise above the average. It will give you energy. Eg. Winston Churchil  Keeps you from giving up. Determination+Possibility thinking+Talent+Knowing your craft. Begin by following these 1) Stop focusing on the impossibilities. 2) Stay away from the experts. Never tell a young person that something cannot be done.  3) Look for possibilities in every situation. Its easy to look at bad, look for good in what other people are doing and apply it. All it takes is the right attitude and anyone can cultivate it. 4) Dream one size bigger than you usually do. 5) Question the status quo. 6) Find inspiration from great achievers. Am I unleashing the enthusiasm of possibility thinking for getting solutions?
7. LEARN FROM REFLECTIVE THINKING - To doubt or believe everything is same. Most people act, rather than think. It is valuable exercise to visit past as 1) It gives you true perspective - what did you like best, what did you learn? - Will give experience - and not take things for granted. 2) It gives emotional integrity. 3) Increases your confidence in decision making. 4) Clarifies the big picture. 5) makes good experience valuable. Experience is a jewel because of the insights it give. How to embrace the lessons of reflective thinking? 1) Set aside time for reflection. 2) Remove your self from distractions, it needs solitude. 3) Regularly review your calendar or journal. 4) Ask the right questions 5) Convert learnings to action. Be intentional. Reflective thinking have 3 values - connect, gives direction for future. Am I regularly visiting the past to gain true perspective and gain understanding. 
8. QUESTION POPULAR THINKING  - I am not an answering machine, I am a questioning machine. If we had all the answers, then why so much of mess? Good thinking, intentional thinking, focused thinking, creative thinking, realistic thinking, strategic thinking, reflective thinking, popular thinking and all other kinds of thinking are ignored. Start being prepared to be unpopular thinking. Popular thinking means not thinking. The problem is 1) it does not require you to think at it. Good thinking is hard work. 2) It offers false hope. There is a difference between acceptance and intelligence. 3) Slow to embrace change. 4) Brings only average results. Popular=Normal=Average How to question the acceptance of popular thinking? Its  not difficult. Get started by 1) Think before you follow. Unpopular thinking has the seeds of vision and popularity.  2) Appreciate those thinking different from your own. 3) Continuously question the way you think. Greatest enemy to tomorrows success is today's success. Every tradition would have been revolution, but may not be good for the future. 4) Try new things in new ways. Ask questions and seek answers. 5) Get used to being uncomfortable . Thinking question. Am I rejecting uncommon questions? 
9. BENEFIT FROM SHARED THINKING - None of us is as good as all of us. 1) Shared thinking is faster than solo thinking. 2) It is more innovative. 3) It brings more maturity. 4) It is stronger than solo thinking. Two heads are better than one, if going in the same direction. A synergy comes in. 5) Returns greater value. - Relationship/interdependence. 6) Shared thinking is the way to great thinking. Steps to harness the ability - 1) Value the ideas of others. Hurting people hurt people. Do you value people? Open yourself to the ideas of sharing idea. 2) Move from competition to cooperation. Praise the idea than the source of the idea. 3) Have an agenda when you meet people. 4) Get the right people around the table. Choose people who can handle change, appreciate others strength, place what is best for the team before themselves, people who possess maturity, who will take ownership. Who we invite to the table make difference. 5) Compensate good thinkers who value others who are emotionally secure. Nothing adds value like lot of good thinkers together. Good leadership can put together right people at right time at the right place for the right purpose. Am I using the heads of others to get compounding result? 
10. PRACTICE UNSELFISH THINKING -  1) It brings personal fulfilment, great satisfaction 2) Adds value to others. 3) Encourages other virtues. 4) Increases quality of life. There is no life as empty as the self centered life. 5) Serve and profits will follow - Instead of trying to be great, be part of something great. 6) Learn - Earn - Return: These are stages of life, each leading to the other. Unselfish act lives legacy. How to experience the satisfaction of unselfish thinking? 1) Put others first. It needs humility and shift in focus.  Humility means not thinking less of oneself, but thinking less about oneself 2) Expose to situation where people need. 3) Give quietly and anonymously. 4)  Invest in people unintentionally. How relationship play out - If only one wins, its only once, if both win, we win many time, if both lose, we lose partnership. 5) Continually check your motives. What seems to be generosity is disguised ambition. People want to put themselves first. Check motives? - Ask daily morning and night: What good am I going to do today? What good have I done today? Give while you live. Be ashamed to die, until you have done something for humanity. Am I continually considering others, and their journey for maximum collaboration? 
11. RELY ON BOTTOM-LINE THINKING - How would you figure out the bottom line? Profit determine whether you are succeeding? Not always. Highest potential is determined not always in terms of money. What is our business, who is our customer? What is the value you  give? Identify the mission. When you are clear about the mission goals flow from it. Make activities relevant to the current culture. 1) It provides great clarity. 2) It helps you assess every situation. 3) Helps you make the best decisions. 4) Generates high morale. Hitting target is exhilarating. 5) Ensures your future. To be successful tomorrow, think of your bottom line today. How to enjoy the returns of bottom line thinking. Learning to become one is challenging 1) Identify the real bottom line. Be specific as possible. Satisfy the wants. Set aside emotions and remove politics. 2) Make bottom line the point. 3) Create a strategic plan to achieve the bottom line. Identify the core elements 4) Align team members with the bottom line. All team members should know the big goal, and how to achieve it. 5) Stick to one system and monitor result continuously. Changing leads to failure. Working and achieving should be way of life.  Am I staying focused on the bottom line to achieve the maximum result? 

Quotes:

“Dont ever be impressed with goal setting; be impressed with goal getting. Reaching new goals and moving to a higher level of performance always requires change, and change feels awkward. But take comfort in the knowledge that if a change doesn't feel uncomfortable, then it's propably not really a change.”

“Success comes to those who have an entire mountain of gold that they continually mine, not those who find one nugget and try to live on it for fifty years. To become someone who can mine a lot of gold, you need to keep repeating the process of good thinking.”
― John C. Maxwell, How Successful People Think: Change Your Thinking, Change Your Life

Listening to a great author's masterpiece is a great privilege we have today. Hope this would help find  niche in contributing to the betterment of our world.

Thank you to the people who are behind this idea.

Change - Coaching Industry : Blair Singer

 Biggest opportunity is right now. 

Crises – change that is trying to happen.

We realized:

• Health care system was faulty – it’s the wealth care system

• Our financial system is faulty

• Our education system is faulty

Why are we still under crises – because we have not changed 

• Technology use is going up and

• Confidence level is coming down

Biggest opportunity right now is education.

Three things that you want the most?

Everything has a lag time – Longest lag industry is Education.

It’s our opportunity – Revolution of education.

It will take education out of school and bring it to us. 

For people to teach and learn it should be:

• Relevant

• The way you teach is more important than what you teach.

• Work on self first – Personal development is important – LV

Most important is who you are. How you show up as a person is important. 

Journey:

• Do it with people who are in the same journey

Four L’s of Learning: 

Physical, Mental, Emotional and Spiritual – 

• Make a list of what you want, 

• seek the best trainers that teach it

• Once you begin learning, teach it to someone else. – HoChan – DHL

Societal responsibility – Else you don’t move ahead. 

Truth is discovered by your own experience. 

• Learn how to teach

You have no choice.

Opinion is the lowest form of knowledge and Highest form of knowledge is empathy – require us to suspend our ego and live in another person’s world. Needs profound purpose bigger than self. Our human race depend on them. Knowledge is based on Empathy, and not opinion.

Start today. You have nothing to loose and the whole world to win. 

Unlocking the Golden Cage : 7 Simple Steps to Designing The Life You Love - Puja Puneet

 As amazing a life coach, Puja Puneet is so is her book 'Unlocking the Golden Cage : 7 Simple Steps to Designing The Life You Love'. This was my 92nd of 2021.

What does a woman need? What feeds her exuberance?  Freedom, Creativity, Heart. A sense of aliveness. Connection. Community. 

Ability to pour her life-giving essence into whatever she is doing. Feel seen, valued and witnessed. 

This book attempts to give key to freedom and transform one from an ordinary woman into a Divine Diva by learning the three pillars on which our life rests, the 3 Cs:

• Courage
• Clarity
• Consistency

Build up the main pillars to live a complete life, and the 3Cs are:

• Connection
• Confidence 
• Career

This books helps to embody these characteristics leaving behind words like sacrifice, tolerance and compromise and own the events of your life, by helping find

• Happiness
• Identity
• Freedom

Provided we practice the tools and techniques. 

Part 1: 

Understand what's blocking your cage first, it should be one of these:

• Family support
• Mindset
• Attitude
• Time 
• Resources

For each of these determine a value between 0 and 10, with 0 being not effecting at all and 10 being the big excuse for why no action is taken. Observe which area have the highest number and make a note to apply the 7 step process to them. 

1. Finding the Key - 100 % Responsibility : E+R= O; Event+Response = Outcome; Reaction is instant, fraught with emotion and you end up regretting; but a response is well thought out, Takes into account different perspectives and puts extreme emotional reactions like anger or panic on hold . Row your boat, assume responsibility for your life.  Stop asking the "Why me?" questions and start asking the "How can I" questions. If you believe that most things you do because "you have to" then you will feel unhappy and dissatisfied. But if you change it to "I choose to", the effect on your outcome is remarkable. 
2. Discover your wings - Clarity : Ditch the guilt and believe. You can get what you deserve, there is enough in the universe. It will make us better in nurturing our family. Passion test, What's important to you? What gives you joy? What in your life is both important and give you joy? Write it down, 10 and choose 5 of it. Write 3 markers for each passion that you can take action on. Now examine the resources and circumstances and see which passion is the best fit from them. Keep following the joy in your life, and you will reach what you are made for. 
3. Opening the lock - Limiting Beliefs : It can be a table with 2 legs, 4 legs or 8 legs. The tables are Opinion, belief and Conviction. Opinions can be changed, beliefs are slightly stronger and convictions where you are very sure of your ways, and difficult to break or change. Our mind has three duties - Protects us, gives meaning to the things that has happened to us, and keep proving it to be right. Tell your brain "I know better than you, so keep quiet". An uncaged women owns her roles and responsibility, Keeps calm in the storm and knows to handle on her emotions, designs her life and is aware of her power to do so. Know your limiting beliefs. Understand how it is ridiculous, how and where you got it from, what was the real meaning behind the event and what is it costing now? 'Truth Letter', will help you release negative emotions form the past and come back to your natural state of love and joy in the present by recapturing the caring, closeness and cooperation that are our natural state. For this to be effective spend equal time to understand the 6 - Anger and resentment (Tantrum), Hurt, Fear, Remorse, Wants, Love. Practice these techniques on a daily basis including gratitude, bragging, listing out your desires, looking at your vision board, reading goals and affirmations. 
4. Goal setting - Desiring and dreaming to fly: Your Big Hairy Audacious Goal (BHAG pronounced Bee-Hag) is the goal toward which all your other smaller goals (1 year vision, 3 year vision) are directed. Dream Big, start small, play mindfully, quantify this! 7 areas to focus are financial, business/career, health and fitness, relationships, recreation, growth, legacy. 
5. Daily Practices - Affirmation and Visualization : Understand and act the life outside the cage. Fake it till you make it. Quit complaining. Affirmations start with I am, are positive, is in present tense, short, specific, end in -ing, have a feeling word, and is about oneself. 
6. Finally Flying - Take action and Be Consistent : Law of attraction, Don't wait, act now. Be Consistent. Law of Vibration. Gratitude Journal. Complain/Blame/Excuse Jar - avoid them, and keep three jars, to know what you do more, meditation, commitment Tin. Appreciation. 
7. Community and Contribution - Create a community: Write three qualities you are looking for in people surrounding you. 
8. Conclusion - Don't wait another moment before starting your journey. 

Part 2: Articles from her blog:

These posts are categorized according to the main pillars of life, each symbolized by a type of bird:

• Eagle: Career and productivity
• Peacock: Confidence and self-esteem
• Dove: Relationships and our role at home
• Others

About 32 articles, each unique and a pearl of wisdom by itself. 

Earl Nightingale

How many times have we thought why the distinction between the 'Haves vs. Have nots'? Why some are so poor, so rich. Why some people are so miserable, while others, so happy. 

Nightingale offers brilliant reasoning why some thrive while others become complacent. Of course, we all know there are social constructs and systematic variables that heavily influence a person's chance to become wealthy. However, there is something to be said for those who persevere with determination and faith through life's most difficult situations. 

There is something special about the person who can dream for a better life AND create a plan of action AND do the work AND stay focused with unwavering commitment and fortitude.

More on Earl Nightingale, visit his website: http://www.earlnightingale.com/ ; Listen to his video 

"Change Your Life in 19 Minutes with Earl Nightingale"

Earl Nightingale (March 12, 1921- March 25, 1989) was an American radio speaker and author, dealing mostly with the subjects of human character development, motivation, and meaningful existence. Earl also served his country during WWII with the United States Marine Corps

"Jobs don't have futures - people do" Earl was way ahead in his thinking.

Have a check list, go over it daily.

1. ”Our rewards in life will always be in exact proportion to our contribution.” Our service, think about it. Do it. 

2. The gold mine. Think deliberately and with a purpose - use the gold mine between your ears. You can improve your effectiveness with 50-100% or more. Wake up early and write down your financial goal. Find ways to improve what you do now and increase your contribution. Write down 5 ideas a day. 

3. Attitude - the most important word in our language. The greatest discovery is that we can alter our lives by altering our attitudes of mind. Your total environment is a mirror of you. Begin to act as the person you most want to become. Your attitude will determine the attitude people have towards you.

Wake up one hour early, and do this. All of this applies to today’s world... he was a genius  way ahead of his time.

Two amazing people Terrance Mckenna  and  Earl Nightingale.

Cinderella - English Movie from 2021

 

Something that I am never tired of, ever - Cinderella. How many books, plays, movies on Cinderella, this year the first read was:

“For over a thousand years, until well into the twentieth century, the canons of beauty would not allow a girl’s foot to grow. The first version of Cinderella, written in ninth-century China, gave literary form to the male fetish for the diminutive female foot, and at the same time, give or take a year, the custom of binding daughters’ feet from infancy took root.

It was about more than aesthetic ideals. Bound feet also bind: they were shields of virtue. By preventing women from walking freely, they foiled any indecent escapades that might have put the family honor at risk.”

~ Eduardo Galeano, ‘Mirrors’

The recent movie released, had mixed reviews. Though some felt it to be sterile or contrived, the musical version reminded of our school play where I ran behind the shoe and The sound of Music, cause this was a musically driven film.

Queen Beatrice was amazing, and reminded me of  Author Anita Nair,  the fabulous fairy godmother, stepmother with a back story and Cinderella who did not give up her dreams even for the prince, but motivated him to follow his.  An amazing  musically-driven bold new take on the traditional story we grew up with. She is able to persevere and make her dreams come true. Dresses by Ella was her dream,  to chase, life outside the basement

Fairy God mother, who come out of the butterfly is not a lady but a man, and it was amazing to listen to him say, 'even magic has its limits' - cannot make shoes more comfortable.

Changing times - first it was the changed dairy milk ad, and now this. 

How to improve customer success rate - Success Gyan @ Clubhouse by Sidz

 How to improve customer success rate? It will depend on:

1) How you bring them into your world - set context tightly. Tell people not to buy impulsively. Have educated buyers. Then quality of customer will be high

2) How you can simplify their journey - Accountability partner - Put a structure- daily/weekly/monthly

3) How to incorporate Gamificatin - more success story, better it is. - Activity based, income/result based, Super star award/Growth based. 

4) Document all of the success journey

5) How you update and learn to grow

Campaign and scalability is the way to increase sales. 

People don't buy because:

1) you over sell

2) Your offer is not good enough

As a beginner - deliver - impact in the first 90 minutes, blow peoples mind, get sales pitch right, once they come into your community, have 1-1, ask 

1) What is your goal

2) what are your challenges

3) Give action plans. 

Be clear on:

1) Micro Niche

2) Micro Market

3) Geo target - city. 

This Life at Play - Girish Karnad

 

Finally, the much awaited moment, was here reading Girish Karnad’s This Life At Play, the English translation of his memoirs in Kannada, Aadaadta Aayushya (which translates as 'life moves on while playing’). The name was from one of Bendre's Poem in Kanada 'Nodnodta dinamaana, aadaadta aayushya',( 'The days go by in the blink of an eye, this lifetime at play.' ) That volume was published in 2011 by the Dharwad-based publishing outfit Manohara Grantha Mala.  While Karnad had translated some portions of the text himself, it is author Srinath Perur who has completed the work. Fifty years earlier (in 1961), Manohara Grantha Mala had brought out Karnad’s first full-length play, Yayati, when he was 25. This was my 91st of 2021.

It begins, with how blessed it was that he was alive, as his parents had plans to abort him. His father had repeatedly cautioned him 'Present pleasures need to be sacrificed for future comforts' . Interestingly it begins with his mother's autobiography, which she had written only until she got married, and when asked said, then life went on. So is this. It end when he gets married, he had plans to write the second part if time permitted, and if ever to name it 'Nodnodta Dinamaana' but seems got busy with other things and ill health.

He lived in Sirsi, moved to Dharwad lived in the 51 houses, went to Karnatak college and moved to Bombay, and then to oxford on Rodes scholarship at second attempt to  returned back to India and work at the Oxford press in Madras, direct his first play Sringeri: Samskara; first movie at Old Mysore, then spend sometime in Poona at the Film and Television Institute of India. Hema Malinis mother was keen on having her married to him, but finally he got married to his sweetheart Saraswathy for ten years. He married her at the age of 42.

Points that interested me in the book are:

His mother had written "Standing here on the brink of my seventy-ninth year and looking back, I see nothing but the mistakes I have made. I have been unsuccessful since my childhood (in everything). Nothing I desired has been achieved. Often when anger or immense sadness overwhelms my mind, I feel I should write down my thoughts. I could not fulfil any desire of mine in my life. I wanted to study a lot and become a BA or an MA, to learn to sing and to play the harmonium, to read a lot and so on. Except for the occupation of reading, nothing was achieved. " As Veena Das says while discussing the play Naga-Mandala, she drowns her individuality in her domesticity and becomes nothing. 

Indians are past masters at whitewashing history, and if you are to be influenced by considerations of what is the politically correct thing to say in the present context, today many construct history which is ideologically correct. 

The ability to instantly turn on a flood of bright, shadeless light, we have lost a certain delicate and ambiguous relationship we had with light and dark. When there is no evidence of light within the darkness surrounding us, the irises pick out floating silvers of light and weave them into changeable amorphous forms. That quality of total darkness, that takes us to the brink of blindness, also has a close relationship with complete silence. The lack of sound itself seems to shape the light one senses.

The other element we have lost along with the world of complete darkness is an abundance of stories. You could run into them everywhere - in side streets, deserted corners, in the thick of the bazaar. 

Going to library became a cause for anxiety. It was like stepping into a minefield: there was no telling where a new bud might sprout, when a lightning bolt might strike. 

Took Maths for BA as it helped to secure first class, which was necessary to get scholarship. Began to see in it patterns, arrangements, rhythm, elegance. Mathematics - how ripple upon ripple, branch growing from branch - led one to the uncanny and wonderful. While proving a theorem, it is important at the outset to identify its constituent parts, the relationship between those parts, and how they are held in balance. Mathematics taught that while working out an individual part, one has to be vigilant about the effect it had on the other parts, and how it changed the overall structure as well as the interrelationships between various parts. This is essential technical training for a playwright. 

Choose with great care the words used for analyzing ideas. The connection between language and philosophy was deep and delicate. Before using a word, it was important to examine how it was used in everyday speech, and to take utmost care that incongruous meanings were not foisted upon it. 

In oxford he studied in a tradition that equated linguistic analysis with philosophy. Shah cautioned him, that 'If we don't accept that, there are human experiences beyond the construct of language, then all philosophy is reduced to word play. '

The hallmark of a gentleman was his confidence, the belief that he could rule any place anywhere in the world. 

Indian's carried the halo of having achieved independence through non-violent means. 

Bombay peninsula used to be seven or eight islands which were joined into a single landmass in the nineteenth century by depositing earth into the sea.  

Thomas Mann's novel 'The Transposed Heads', original story is from 'The Kathasaritasagara' and is in the form f a riddle: "If two men's heads are interchanged, then who is who? Would a man be identified by his head or his body? Thomas Mann had taken the riddle and its traditional answer - 'the head is the superior part, the body inferior; the head identifies the person and worked it ironically into a novella.

Interesting story of  Balasaraswati who was an amazing dancer and her friend, famous singer Subhalakshmi, both were devdasi's and best friends. 

Bharata comes from the initial sounds of bhava, raga and tala. 

When in Pune and NID Appukuttan paid best compliment. 'If you had not acted quickly, kutityattam would have died out'.

His creative journey was linked to the electrification of Indian culture and entertainment. The wind under the wings of his exceptional career was always being the right age, in the right place, when a new industry lit up: modern theatre, then independent cinema, then television. 

His refusal to compromise with any lumpen politics meant he was frequently at risk of physical attack.His aim was to stop the poisoning of the well of secular coexistence.  There were glass thrown at home in early 1990 when daughter was doing homework, his name was first in the list of suspected assassin on Gauri's murder. 

So for one generation he was a prodigy, for another a heart-throb, for a third, a part of their intellectual upbringing, beamed into homes on Turning point. (TV serial)

At the base of his attitude was a simple lack of insecurity: about his standing as an artist, a Kannada writer, an Indian or a Hindu. He knew that none of the men who denounced him could ever match his authority on national culture or heritage, or his record as their steward. He put that unassailable position to use in two ways: to push creative and imaginative boundaries, and to lend courage to others to defy hate and ignorance. 

His children were raised at the confluence of five languages, and sixth finger on hand was Sanskrit. Only book he insisted his children to read was Mahabharata. He had read original Vyasa. 

One message after his death put was "Like a fruit - laden tree. Always giving. Always growing."

He and his son Ragu represented two halves of the city of Banglore. Girish the genteel and cultured world Raghu its rapid and well-capitalized life. They could guide each other across the line, and did. The last of the play was Boiled Beans on Toast.

This was released this May on his 83rd birth anniversary. 

How to Tackle Workplace Politics - Sawan

Good leaders behave with- humility and drive - they move from being ordinary to extraordinary. 

Trust  has an impact at the speed in which organizations move. Absence of trust creates workplace politics. 

In life it is never our intention, but our behavior makes a difference. 

To build trust - we need to understand that there is a definition to Trust.

It has two distinct sides - character side and competence side. 

• Character is made up of integrity and intend (motive)
• Competence side is made up of your capability and results. 

We trust our parents, but we will not let them do heart surgery unless they are a cardiac surgeon, so the importance of capability and result. 

You can thing this as a tree. Integrity is the root, intend is the trunk of the tree, is it straight or crooked. Capability are branches and results are the leaves. 

When we have the four components in place, we have the fruit of trust. 

Relationship need sincerity, energy and effort. Ability to take risk together and overcome it together. This is what leaders provide. People matter. 

Is Conflict harmful? The word has the connotation of people having disagreement and difference of opinion. Word makes you feel that it is detrimental. There is a range to conflict. There are two distinct end to this. 

1. Artificial harmony : The yes man. Chamcha.
2. Personal attack : 

Centre of the spectrum is where conflict. 

Conflict is to shed light on a topic, and not shedding heat on a topic. Nobody has monopoly on great ideas. Mind for conflict that is true and can be beneficial and best ideas will come out. That is the environment that employees want. Everything should feel being part of the leader. 

Employees feel empowered when they feel that they are part of a mission. 

Ton of articles on leadership, and is gone beyond buzz word. There is a misconception that if someone has reached Managerial position must have leadership quality. 

There is a difference between manager and leader. 

1. Management is about POSDC. 
2. Leadership is about the ability to create a mission who lead from front, with iron will and tremendous humility and code of ethics. They know what they want, and do not get influenced by circumstances. 

Real leaders walk the talk. They know when to express opinion, advise and when not to do anything. There is a fine line of balance, on when to work on an individual. When you work on them, you always win. 

Unfortunately the HR system is broken - Indian management is finest management, and HR is talented, HRs true role is to become an integral partner with each department. Make the company a factor of phenomenal people. They need to resent in version 2.0. They need to make people understand what are the core values. 

They should also be able to define the business results.

There will be four type of people:

• Who don't have value and don't provide results, Not fit to be in the team. 
• Have value but no results - their skills need to be addressed 
• Does not have the value but produce the result - if they do not have value their promotability will not work, and they will become and issue gradually
• Superstars. 

Invest in executive and leadership coaching. The journey to top can be lonely. You are making difficult decisions. 

Healing in a virtual environment, building relationship is difficult.  There needs to be an HR revolution to take companies to the next level. 

Any company that you are part of , there is existing level of politics in play there. You get to choose your friends, fitting into a system, and being in agreement with it, is not same thing. It need some amount of street smartness. You have to win peoples heart, so fitting into system comes first. Or the system will not tolerate you and will throw you out.

Unwritten rules:

1. You are being judged at all times - your physical appearance, smile, handshake, acts, - by you supervisor, boss, colleagues, team. Are you composed, are you trying to win an arguments? Spoken word cannot be taken back. This commitment is more important than breathing, and it will lead to damaging trust. 
2. Do not appear too busy. The people who are the busiest are the most available. Honor your deadlines. It's okay to ask for help. If you are someone who is complaining, it can become addictive and will become expert at it and will not be a solution provider. Keep your home life at home. Polite conversation in work place is okay, don't become over involved in others personal matter. What is not necessary to say, it's very important not to say. Do Compliment when you see good.
3. You are responsible for getting your work noticed. E+R=O. Event + Response = Outcome. No complaining. Fix it. 
4. In the professional context you are not paid for your time, or knowledge. You get paid for the value of results you provide. You have to be superb at your job.  Don't stay still. Act.
5. Insane work ethics. Get ready for a guiling journey. You have to pay for the price. If you stay in a big mansion, you will have more to clean, bigger electricity bill. First invest time in learning the game work hard. 

If your organization has top level change frequently, it is a system of underlying disease. If you don't get reward for your results, it is pointing at a gap in the top level and cultural issues. Sometime even top management, has difficulty to change the culture and DNA of the organization. 

There is a version of you take a deep introspection of yourself, get someone's advise, find if it is a cultural issue, which you are unable to fix, look at other organizations for prospect. 

Statistically speaking, can't say if this is the biggest factor for people leaving, but it is one of the major factor. There is lot of stress for people who are left behind, with many people loosing job. Journey of entrepreneurship will be 10 times more difficult. Many go into with a passion. If you love cooking, prepare meals for family and entertain friends, you cannot manage restaurant business, unless you know a lot of other things. You need to understand statistics, business, marketing and many more things. 

It's the job of the leader to set the context and let know the team about the project/job, to avoid conflict. Even if it is without context or it is a role pay, it will be upto us to invent, our self  and prove that you can be relied upon to take on such role and pull them successfully. 

 Is ignoring office politics right? Confronting can be difficult. Start getting comfortable to become uncomfortable to make a great carrier. Focus on your work, keep your nose down and chip away at what your responsibility are. You have to keep your blinders on, and be street smart. You can't be ignorant. Don't entertain, but keep it in your vision. To groom someone, to make yourself grow, you cannot play the blame game, its not a team behavior. You need to bring solutions to the table. You will need serious people to bring serious solutions. 

Fundamental for amazing career, the road to career development is paved with personal development. You have to see the upside and downside, and look at from a neutral place. Don't be influence by the circumstance, but look at both sides. Interpersonal skill will play a huge role, in how you make decisions. Work on your strengths. Don't bother about what is wrong with you. When you work on your strength, you work with your heart and mind. Strength =Talent*Investment

Work on personal development, interpersonal skills and strength. 

A Farewell to Gabo and Mercedes: A sons memoir - By Rodrigo Garcia

"A good story is the truth".  

“This is a beautiful farewell to two extraordinary people. It enthralled and moved me, and it will move and enthrall anyone who has ever entered the glorious literary world of Gabriel García Márquez.”—Salman Rushdie. 89th of 2021.  

Two books I wanted to reread at the beginning of the year, and right in front of me are by Gabriel Garcia Marquez - 'One Hundred Years of Solitude' and 'Love in the time of Cholera' as I had read that One Hundred Years of Solitude was being made into a movie, and wanted to re-read it before watching the movie. But with other books falling in the kitty, they took a back stage though right in front of my eye, and here came the reminder from his Son. 

With each section marked with a beautiful passage from his father's works mostly from the two books in front of me, the memoir though about Marquez & Mercedes, but as you read it at times you forget it is their memoir as the feeling is universal. It's basically of Gabo's final days in 2014 when he battled with dementia. A chronicle of love and loss. Rodrigo had taken notes and written them during the last three weeks of his father's life, but did not know what to do with them, then it was when his mother passed away in 2020 he brought this out. 

“What makes matters emotionally turbulent is the fact that my father is a famous person. Beneath the need to write may lurk the temptation to advance one’s own fame in the age of vulgarity. Perhaps it might be better to resist the call and stay humble. Humility is, after all, my favorite form of vanity. But as with most writing, the subject matter choses you, and so resistance could be futile.”

Some memorable quotes are:

" What matters in life is not what happens to you, but what you remember and how you remember it" - 

"Only the first book would be of any interest, to me, any way, because it covers the years that made me a writer"

" I work with my memory. Memory is my tool and my raw material. I cannot work without it. Help me". 

He thought great discipline was one of the cornerstones of writing a novel, particularly when it came to framing the shape and limits of the tale. Markaz had never read his novel once written until bedridden. 

Sentimental but a beautiful writing, neither aloof nor about feeing, but making it universal, as others see them, finding a balance, reveling the private that is interesting to others. 

Saying good bye to both the parents - when both die, it is like end of a planet, a religion, looking through a telescope and looking for a planet and knowing that it is no more there. Much of their cultures survives in some new form in the new planets created by us merging with our partners and new life. 

"I think of my father every morning when I dry my back with a towel the way he taught me after seeing me struggling with it at the age of six. Much of the advice is always with me." Exactly my thought worded beautifully. 

Rodrigo says, he felt differently then (during those three weeks) of his dad. "Detached. Maybe that is the purpose of transformation, to help you uncouple, just as a simple look at your newborn instantly triggers feelings of attachment."

How to Reject - Rejections! - Puja Puneet

 Just Ask, there is nothing you will lose. 

SW - Some win, Some work, some one is waiting.

Sweetest revenge is success.

Self estimate is very important:

1. Keep a victory log - our mind is attuned to remind what is wrong, keep writing what you did right
2. Mirror exercise - Look at the mirror and speak to yourself, start recognizing your awesomeness. Don't take yourself seriously. Every one is an opinion of themselves, 
3. Anything you can do of your own - whatever it takes to make you feel good, make a joy list, easiest way, good music.
4. Creating faith and surrender in the divine.  Ask good to show a solution fast and take us out of the current situation

Science of asking, and art of learning:

1. We from a young age is taught, we are not to ask.  Learning to ask is an art by itself. If you are willing to ask, be willing to give. 
2. We don't ask, because we feel obligated. You will pay it someday. The big ship is supposed to protect the boat, boat the yacht, yacht to the tube. If each of us is kind, it will go on. 

Courage to ask, and ability to hear a No. 

Asking and learning to accept rejection. 

When demoralized and we lose our spirit, don't fix too fast. we are not robots, and human being is sensitive. Give time to recover. When our emotions are back in control, our intelligence comes back, they are in inversely proportional. 

If your are persuasive enough you may get it. It could be a God challenge. When we are very close to our goal, there is a check if we really want it and will keep it properly?

What is the meaning you are going to give to rejection? Don't blame for the rejection yourself or others, recognize and learn the lesson. Just have patience. God will grace the situation to match your frequency.

When we have a wound, you don't apply the bandage immediately, you leave it open for some time, to feel the feeling, allowing it to come and go. 

How can we be kind and not defensive? We want to be kind to others, and yet to our self. Create the observer and experiencer gap. When you see other self bullying yourself, you will not allow the other person get into it. You are able to choose your response when you are an observer. Sometimes the best response is silence, walk away or confront. It cannot be pre-decided. When you become observer you tap into your intelligence. Reaction is what those people want, it will happen when you are not in your calm, your emotions are high and intelligence is low. Move into compassion going into their shoes. If they knew better, they would do better. If kindness and firmness don't work, be aggressive. That too is a response, becoming a kali till the time it is a choice and it is not happening to you. 

There is a need in all of us to be acceptable. When acceptance is such a deep need for us, that we become defensive. It is very natural. Just as anger shows up when things don't fall as our plan. We can control it by understanding that when a person don't want to understand us, they will not. Some people are predetermined to be misunderstanding. 

Manifestation: For us to attract anything, we have to match that frequency. Sometimes who are that huge in their aura it is difficult to match that frequency. 

How to use the tools daily, make it routine and rituals. Start with one thing at a time, and understand why it is done the way it is done. When our mind know the why, we are able to stick to the routines. Do gratitude every morning. You create a new neuron pathway. The negativity gets moved. If you understand the science, the better will be the application.

When there is a rejection, people pull your leg, and we go into depression. Most important, is what you say to yourself. Confront them for making fun of you. You can accept, confront or remove. When someone say it was joke - you say it was not a fun to me. Address it to them then and there, either in public or in person. If they don't correct , you can remove them. Don't be scared of loosing people. Start having right people around you. It will make all the difference.

In relationship we experience rejections, and we are unable to find the why, and it keeps on lurking in your life, and you are unable to get out of it. It becomes difficult to forgive to forget. There are two things:

1. Life is not fair
2. The quality of our life, is directly proportional to the questions we ask

The why question always belong to the victim. All whys don't have an answer. Sometimes you go deeper into the sad of life, when you ask why as the answer will never come. Replace it with How questions. Say you are strong enough, and God is trying to give something better. What is the lessons that I can learn from this. You will move into a place, where you can let it go. Letting anything go is very hard, as there is always the trauma. Forgiveness is the choice you make. It is saying I am not going to be hurt. This peace is more important. Forgetting is not in your hand. Allow better things to replace that garden. You can pluck out the weed, replace with better things, the weed not coming back is not in your hand. You can keep replacing the weed. Learn tolerance, peace and work with them. 

Zero confidence but want it desperately and feel you wont get it, how to raise the frequency? Work on confidence by taking small risk and accomplishing them. All of us shiver through life. First time we are all very nervous. But take the step. When we are insistent on something, it is an attachment. Ask God, give me this or something better. 

When people ignore you should we take it as rejection? It will depend on your relationship. People create drama sometimes - say not my monkey not my circus. People out of ego, show others as lesser. When they know if you are not willing to participate it is good. But if the people is important, and they do it because they don't know how to convince, best thing to do is to address is. Sorry is a beautiful word. Sometime it is good to realize and confront, as they may be hurt by what we did. Learn to handle in a better way - Have confidence and courage. 

Have right people surround you, you can outsource your rejection.

6 Steps to Build a Coaching Business - Sidz

4 Basics for business to be done in the same order: Principles /Strategy/ Tactics/Tools - This is the positioning. 

Event/Situation+Response = Outcome

6 Steps to Build a Coaching Business, a recipe for results:

1. Finalize your Micro Positioning: Micro Niche/Micro Market/Geo Location - You will be in blue ocean and will not be one in the crowd. To begin with start with your locality. Angel is in the details
2. Create a Business Plan: Courses/Coaching/Consulting - Better cash flow with limited resources. Win before you win. 
3. Set up your digital systems: Website, funnels, Emails, Webinars and LMS. Leverage Automation.
4. Generate Leads and sales: Webinars. Workshops. Messenger Classes. Attract Customers.
5. Nurture Digital Tribes: Inner circle calls. Masterminds. Hackathons. Build Communities. Don't just be a product seller. 
6. Scale up your marketing and advertising: Content Marketing. Facebook and Google Ads. Increase profits. - To do this we need to have product.

https://siddharthrajsekar.com/digital-coach/

90th of 2021. 

It's a marathon and not a sprint. 

Step 1: Finalize your micro positioning:

The Five P Validation System To Find the Niche:

First is you need to be passionate about your topic. If you’re not passionate about it, you’ll not continue for a long time. 

Passion should solve a problem. If your love for a subject does not solve a problem, then it is just a hobby. 

If your expertise can solve a problem for a particular persona, that is your micro-market. 

There should be potential in the market for your topic. For example, the e-learning industry is booming right now. So, there’s massive potential for you to get onto this journey as a digital coach. 

If your passion can solve a problem, targeting a particular persona, and then there is potential in the market, you can get paid, which will make your niche more profitable.

Overdeliver Value.

The Seven Macro Niches:

1. Business. 

2. Career growth. 

3. Health and wellness.

4. Money and wealth. 

5. Relationships. 

6. Personal development.

7. Arts and crafts.

Step 2: Create a business plan

How do we develop curriculum?

It is not about the knowledge that you give, it is about them. They need results. There is lot of knowledge available on the net.

First, write down a hundred questions, which our market is going to be asking you. Based on those a hundred questions, you will design your curriculum. And based on those hundred questions, you’ll start to go out there on social media. And you’ll begin to address those questions because people are asking those questions.

Keep the course of design keeping in mind. What a customer wants and how you can help them solve their problem quickly or as fast as possible in the best possible way with the least resistance. It’s not a tactic here. It is a genuine feeling that has to come through even in your videos.

You can get creative on your expression of your knowledge and express the knowledge, but don’t get creative on the framework.

Ten steps on how you can design your content curriculum.

1. Clarity on you Micro Niche
2. Clarity on your Position - in congruence to your niche, goal and mission 
3. Clarity on your Market Need
4. Clarity of Outcome - Top 10 results your students will get when they finish your course? 
5. Clarity of Funnel - You need to have three levels. So a lead magnet is an introductory course. A tripwire is a conceptual course. Then you need to have your core product, which is your implementation course. And then, you need to have another level of profit maximizer, which is where you want to create an impact
6. Create a profit maximiser
7. Define the value
8. Clarity in the pricing strategy
9. Clarity in Validation
10. Improvistion
11. Success Stories

How do you plan the curriculum for your course?

The results will come after the right operating system is installed. When you install the new programs, they can follow through, take action. When they get results you use their success stories as part of your curriculum to inspire the next lot. These success stories will create mind shifts for the new people who are getting into your student community. A new person comes in and sees an interview. They feel like, wow, if this person can do it, I can do it.

Step 3: Different Systems in Digital Coaching:

1. Content Marketing
2. Funnel Building
3. Lead Generation System
4. Webinar Sales System
5. Payment Gateway System
6. Learning Management System
7. Automation System
8. Reporting System
9. Customer Management System
10. Community Building System

Tools for Digital Coaching:

3 Concepts:

1. Choose the best
2. Aim for Mastery
3. The Success Ratio : 80% of your success is in your internal game, 15% of success is external communication. Only 5% of your success is dependent on the tools.

25 Tools are:

1. Click Funnels
2. Convert Kit
3. Get Response
4. Teachable
5. Click Magick
6. Blue Host
7. WPX Hosting
8. NameCheap
9. Webinar Jam
10. Everwebinar
11. Zoom
12. Demio
13. Google Drive
14. Zapier
15. Razorpay
16. Stripe
17. ScreenFlow
18. Ecamm Live
19. Garageband
20. Useproof
21. Manychat
22. Collectchat
23. Telegram
24. Mindnode
25. Mint (Money Management)

Ways to Promote a Knowledge Business:

Your digital coaching business will only be profitable to the extent that you diversify and build momentum. Course, coaching, consulting, and collaboration. 

You can do courses which could be in the form of videos or text. Courses are the easiest thing to do. You can create a digital product. 

• You can create a conceptual course, and 
• then can create an implementation course where your effort is only one time, but the scalability is much, much higher. 

Once you’ve finished the course layer, then you come into the second layer, which is the coaching layer. There are two kinds of coaching. 

• You can do one-to-one coaching, or 
• you could also do one-to-many coaching. 

and the one-to-one coaching can be like four, four sessions, eight sessions, and group coaching can also be based on those kinds of packages based on the number of sessions. 

Consulting, which is a little bit more long-term engagement with handholding. 

Next, come collaborations. You can create an alliance with three kinds of people: 

1. Competitors - Make a list of all the competitors in your industry and see how you can create a win-win model with them. To create such meaningful collaboration with competitors, you need to have a broadminded and open approach without having a scarcity mindset. all had our specialties and we could co-exist and help each other. 

 2. Complementors - These are essentially people who have the same target market as yours. They are not direct competitors, but they may have similar customers. For example, a personal finance coach may have many of his customers who may be working professionals. You may be a healer whose target market is also working professionals. It will be great to create an alliance and a revenue share model to make it a win-win for both of you. So, make a list of complementors, and build an alliance with them.

3. Influencers - The other way to maximize your profits through alliances is by connecting with big social media influencers. You can find YouTube influencers, Podcast influencers, or Twitter influencers who have a large following. If you have something valuable to offer to their audience, then strike a win-win model, where you could pay them for a “shout-out,” and they make a post about you. For them, the effort may be small, but the returns for you could be high. You could also invite the influencer to come and speak to your tribe, which will enhance your brand and will be valuable to your customers.

Alliances are mighty when you can think about how all can win first. You must never approach this with a “me first” attitude. It will never work. But when they see the value in the collaboration; it will work. Partnership is different from alliances. Get your customers to become your affiliate partners. Those people who have bought and experienced your product are your best referral partners. You can quickly maximize your profits and reduce your cost per acquisition by creating a win-win model with your customers. First, give them 30% to 60% commissions for referring your products. Next, give them commissions when people upgrade to your higher-level programs. Have partner contests and giveaways to incentive their efforts still further. 

Usually, in any affiliate program, people want to make extra income but are unsure how to market and sell the product. Adding that layer of education for your partners will give you an added boost in your profitability. Develop an entire library of partner assets - videos, images, and social media posts that my partners can use to quickly promote your courses and webinars, which gives high leverage in marketing and helps you reduce customer acquisition costs. Caution: do not prematurely launch your Partner programme. 

The main principle is not how much money you make on the internet. It’s about how you manage the money that you make that really determines your success. Whatever money that you make online, it’s not about how much you make, but it’s how you manage that money. You have to divide them into these five buckets. TWCGO:

Taxes : 40%  of your income should go here

Wealth: 10% of all your earnings should go to savings

Charity: 10% of your earnings should be spend on supporting causes

General: 20% should be used for general expenses - home bill, mortgage, grocery etc. 

Operations: 20% of whatever you make should be spend on business growth

The other question is how to start doing this the right way. 

Step one is you need to master the game of traffic generation, especially on the internet. If you want to master this game and create multiple streams of income on the internet, you need to master traffic. 

And the second step is you need to master the game of conversions. Getting people to pull money out of their wallets to buy your products or your service or whatever you’re offering to the right audience. When you master traffic and conversions, then you can apply this model to any number of businesses that you know, that you may have in your mind.

Don't be a copycat. It will not help.

Because 

others will be able to see through them and realize this person is saying exactly the same thing as other people. So the credibility also goes down. 

Even though one learns from a mentor and follows their coaching system and learns, the way that you will represent your knowledge is unique. You will show it in your thought process, by giving your own twist to the whole game. Some of those principles are evergreen and go back to all the marketing geniuses in the world. They talk about the same things, but how you present the information, the way that you develop your formula is unique though.

Second problem in the thought industry is they feel that what kind of results that they can get is precisely by watching somebody else. They set that as a benchmark without realizing that each one’s journey is going to be different because each one’s niche is unique, each one’s persona is special.

Another problem is people set unrealistic benchmarks. If you follow the right system, you can achieve some results in the next 60 days, 90 days. Each one of us has a different journey. Each one of us comes from a different background. Some people are able to get the results because of the six to seven years of struggling before this, making those mistakes, and ultimately developing that model. 

The third problem is a lot of people want shortcuts, a get rich quick dream. Shortcuts don’t work. Even if it works for a short time, you may lose that money or something. There’s always the law of nature, what goes around, comes around. You have to invest your time, you have to aim for mastery. You cannot expect to become like an expert overnight, but you need to think of yourself as a work in progress on a day-to-day basis to put in the effort, learn those skill sets.

People who are looking for shortcuts find out what is that latest Facebook ad tool that you’re using, the landing page, a template you’re using and simply use the same landing page, swipe all your headlines, and do it. There is no shortcut to success, but if you follow a system that is already working, when you infuse your uniqueness into a system that’s working, that can help you get results faster.

The shortcut mindset itself is wrong. Those people who are coaches themselves and who want only the hacks and the shortcuts will end up attracting those kinds of students who want shortcuts. 

Be Unique! Be You!