Confidence Booster

 Own the nervousness. Anything you do you have fear. Small risk when accomplish builds confidence. 

Confidence is a muscle, you build. You have to start first. Confidence follow success. 

Courage, Self Esteem and such tiny step leads to confidence. Enjoy the process. 

1. Stop Criticising self. Start sending positive affirmations.  Only when we do that, others will start supporting us. First notice what you talk about and then stop it. Negativity - add up until now. What you are till yesterday, will be different from what you are today. 
2. Take 100% responsibility of your life -Stop complaining and blaming.  Stop being confused. Design your own life, don't be a puppet. Take feedback from others but make your own decisions. Whatever you commit in the next 30 days, you must do. Most important is when you make commitment and don't do it, your subconscious mind and conscious mind are not in sink, and you lose confidence. Respect you get, when you respect yourself, and this comes from Trust. Trust yourself first. Accomplish your commitments. 
3. Mindset should be the faith that everything is happening for you and not against you. Meditation is to get the universal energy to your side. Be connected with one energy that exist in all of us. By way of prayers, cleaning, dancing, music, exercise. How you plug into that energy does not matter. Plug yourself into that energy. For the great, good has to go. When your faith is like that, nothing will matter. Believe in your faith. Do it every single day. 
4. Energy around: People and environment - Inspiring and Expiring. People that surround us are those who inspire us or those who expire us. We need to be careful of them. When we are being judged or not supported, we give the same energy to them. Think, if they knew better, they would have done better. Know, their intention is good, but is unable to see what we see. Overcome everything we think is an obstacle our way. Once this is done, people will start having confidence in us. List out the people and environment who support you and who do not. Clutter takes away your positive energy. 
5. Control your emotions and become smart using your subconscious mind. We make decision from conscious mind; it is where our intelligence leave. Our thoughts and belief system are in our subconscious mind. Will power is when we keep the command of our mind. We have to build will power. Say it. Do it. Say it. Do it. Our emotion drive our subconscious. Emotions are deep and shallow. It is not just positive or negative. All sad emotions go deep. We have to train ourselves to net let negative emotions to go deep, and train mind to let positive emotions go deep. Shallow emotions, we are so achievement oriented, instead of celebrating, you land up moving to next goal. The whole society is revolved around celebrating yourself. If you don't celebrate it don't go deep. What goes deep mind demand recurrence of the same. Angry people will be angry with everyone, there is pattern that is created. Don't let emotions go deep. How do we break patterns? Conscious practises. Keep negativity at superficial level, - (i) say 5 sentences for positive things and 1 sentence for negative things. (ii) Speak about things you can control. Talk to wife about boss problem and talk to boss or friends with wife problem. Talk with the right person.  
6. Connect with your pleasure. We are living in patriclan society, where everything masculine is given lot of importance. Women should own the power, to have the world in balance. Be in Balance. Come into your own. Sacrifice, adjust, tolerate - was what was expected of women, and they become like dry well. She is not able to create hormones to be happy. Give important to your desires. You let men mistreat you, and then when they mistreat you, you feel bad. Having pleasure is not being selfish. We need more sleep because we need more energy and have less outside pleasure. Bragging - post about what you like about yourself, do Gratitude and write your desire.  This is a golden Trinity. Understand the importance of feeling yourself important. Don't be just giving and giving. Sit yourself and enjoy your own company. 
7. Resistance is the enemy and opposite of confidence. This is the one thing that will always show up. It covers doubt, fear, overwhelm, perfectionism, procrastination. Change brings resistance. Resistance speaks to your weakness. It is invisible and is internal. It dampens our confidence and courage. The minute you recognise resistance you can overcome it. Change in your life will bring something new, something good. Find places where you can make change, explore newness. If you don't grow, you will start going down. Nothing in life is stagnant. Best book on resistance and change - who moved my cheese. 
8. Attract what you desire. You can design your own life. What you want gets decided by you. But when you get it is not designed by you. Farmer can sow but can't decide when it will sprout. When you are desperate for something; it would come to you until you do not need it. Wait, and wait for. Desperation of desire cause suffering, drop desperation. Press the lift button and wait is desire. You keep pressing the button and cursing, it's desperation. Enjoy the wait, and don't keep cursing. You have a choice. If we overwater our plants it will die. Give time to God to respond. Where in your life you can replace faith with restlessness. We are cocreating. Give time to others to respond. Have no problem losing what you want to attract. 
9. Hour of power - Every morning, 5 things grateful for, 5 things To do, food exercise and sleep tracker. 20 -20 -20 : Affirmations, exercises, Journaling. Life is all about expectations. Don't push it for more than an hour. Do what you are doing very well. What is important is consistency. Start to see how you can bring all of this into your life. 
10. Connection - We feel isolated and alone because we are not willing to be vulnerable anymore. Own the part of your that you are ashamed of. We start to hide behind and not become confident about. Just stop hiding. To connect you have to be honest, and to be honest you need courage. Keep energy up. This taught to own who you are. To be okay to be judged and open. Clarity is power. Know what is stopping you. World is divided into two kind of people - 1) Who thing they are worthy 2) Who do not know or think they are worth?  - Think you are worthy for who you are, without anything in your life. Love yourself and don't hide behind it. Whoever you think you are, bring out another version of you. Nourish new quality. Be seen. Leave what your are absolutely dependend on. Be uncomfortable. Only then you will be confidence. Only when you are seen you will feel connected and when you are connected you will feel worthy. We judge one another, first stop judging yourself. Own yourself. What are you hiding? Stop. Get out of the race for approval beggary. 
11. Consistency - Know why you are connected to what you want to do. Why gives us the power to follow the routine. Publicly announce, and you will feel the need to accomplish.  Celebrating small victories will give us happiness and boost our confidence. We can build habits by connecting old habits with new habits! Start with tiny habits. Don't make too many commitments. Set routine. Celebrate what you want to do. Mind just doesn't focus on good stuff. Don't stop, start stop start. Once you start, continue. Start consolidating all the activity, let your mind process the information, and write down three things you want to do consistently. Build habits and think of tools that will work for you. There are ways - but are you ready? It will not come from a place of relaxation. You will have to be dedicated and give 100% of yours. Who will become in 5 years, will depend on you doing what you say. Become who you are inside. 
12. Gratitude - Most profound thing in life. Negativity, blaming, for all this Gratitude is the anecdote. This is the highest emotion to live in. When you are in a place of Gratitude you cannot be in any other place. You can be happy but upset about something. There is a science behind Gratitude. You will be calm and composed. You will be able to convert negativity to positivity. Start as soon as you can. You can use Gratitude journal, Go as deep as you can, and it will become a recurring activity. There is a gratitude rock. Get up with gratitude, sleep with gratitude. It is about removing the poison you have build over the years. Gain your power back. Start appreciating others, let go of your ego. Make the effort, make the pattern, let your tube grow. Become the amazing human being. Do this one thing. That is enough. Live in the space of gratitude, and your life will transform. 
13. Forgiveness - Function of our mind is to protect us. To give meaning to our life. To prove us right. You create file, and keep putting facts, and think that is right. We need to change the meaning to the events in life. Give story that empowers us. Give the twist, say things in the head that helps us settle. Hurt people hurt people. Vicious cycle. Everyone gives the meaning they want. Why forgive? Whose life it is? If you are riding, and a vehicle comes in the wrong direction, will you move or not? Talk about people we love and not about people we hate. Own your life. Don't be consumed by anything or anyone. Give up and let it go. Start at looking at people's intention. Say they are just like that; we are just one of the person. Clean yourself or keep things in yourself. Don't just be comparing. First decide do you want to forgive? Truely decide do you want to change your story? Then think of How to forgive. Giraffe and squirell cannot become friends and want one to be short or the other to be tall. Tell people so they can realise. People keep hurting and you keep retreating, go for a cup of coffee. Fix if you can or accept it. Don't live in a space where you have to live with the hurt. The harder you find forgiving, when you hold a lot of regret and shame. 
14. Anger - is not a decision. It's a reflex action. When someone upset you, it shows up. You don't have control over your anger as it surfaces. Feeling of anger is a feeling of protection. Tell the person what makes you angry - there is no need of shouting. Just say, this is making me angry, or you are pushing me to get angry. Helplessness trigger anger. Understanding anger help control. Respect before you are angry. When you are angry you cannot thing all this. Your intelligence shuts when you are emotional. Where in your life do you feel helpless? Below anger is fear. Below fear is always hurt. Divert your anger. Walk away from the situation. Don't let it lose this time. Build consequences. Acceptance is the best way out. Start to show the world who you are. Compassion, kindness, love. Bring that into the world. Deflect this week your anger. When we speak, speak with elegance, calmness. You and others will respect you. 
15. Parenting - Honour the mother in us. Don't judge this aspect. Connect the type of person we are to the mother we are. Don't shout and scream at the child. It will reduce the soul of the child. Don't break the soul of the child, to make him one who the society appreciate.  As much as you can, let your child make his decisions. Honour the soul inside the child. Start with positive energy, hug and hold him. Let children make their own choice. Else they will not know how and when to make decision. If he fails, let him, and make him fix that. Let them play sports. It will teach them many things. Be interested in the things your child have to say. You don't lecture him, do something with him, that is of interest to him. Pure basic kindness is what is needed. Believe in them. Zero criticism rule. Check if you can say it in front of the people. If not, don't say behind the back. Gossip feels like fun. Don't criticise people when they are not around. Be consistent, and make children be consistent. Make them important, build trust. Delayed gratification. Teach them how to earn the things they want. Make them a chart for 30 days - write gratitude, do something that they need to improve it - at 80% give him and if achieves 100% give bonus.  It's bribing, if you give them something to get things done. These are great qualities to have. Discipline, Responsibility, Kindness, positivity - are the important things. Give him or her the tag 'I am proud of you'; this is more important than 'I love you'. Pray to God, to give them a great destiny, so they can shine. 
16. Relationships - Love Language. It is basically every human being has a language of love. When they get love in that form, they understand it better. Any other form, they don't understand. Five Love Language are: Gift, act of service, words of appreciation, Physical touch, quality time. Touch replenishes the soul. Infant die, if they are not touched. Its applicable to your parents, children, spouse, friends. It is something for which you will fight, or you get upset about. Once one act is complete, we will need the next. 
17. Creative Happiness - Ever women do not need career. But need creative happiness. God put a part of beauty in each of us, some have explored it and some have not. Find where your beauty is and explore this side of yours. The more you learn, the happier you will be and connected to your soul. Beauty is important in the world. Understand it. Explore it. You like to admire the beauty of nature. It calms you down. Do more of what give you happiness. Build your talent. We get attracted to what is inside us. Have freedom and independence to make own decision. Highest punishment is to take freedom. So people are putting them in jail. Financial Independence give one more freedom.
18. Planning - Affirmation and Visualisation. Affirmations are basically mantra. Any kind of repetition, that silence your mind. 'I am an amazing enjoyable life, because I am an amazing, wonderful wife.' It should start with I am, use emotional adjective that excites you as we are talking to our subconscious, let it be in present sense - 'ing' word, it should be specific, it should be positive, read it at night before sleeping and morning as soon as you wake up, it will help make closure you desire. Read with emotion. Emotion is the key. It is all around essence - like Gratitude. You should be able to visualise your affirmations. 
19.  Handle consistency - Be an explorer than a committer. You start strong, and then weaken. When you weaken, have a strategy in advance. Create 80% rule (You dont work 30 day, you leave out saturday and sunday and get paid for a month). Restarting takes lot of courage, so don't stop. Continue. Have a BHAG goal - Big hairy audicious goal. It will keep you excited, and you will keep trying. If you stop having goal you will not achieve anything. Make your own rules, we are given intelligence, use it. 
20. Kindness. World has lost compassion. Be kind to self, and start with it, then to your family, to people who come into your life. Whenever you have a choice, choose kindness and not revenge.