Where did the year go by?

Happen to read the article on Where did the year 2015 go by in the Times of India - so true the pace of time never change, but some people never get much done, and others achieve the moon in the same span of time - Is it all because of perception? Every time as December approaches, you realise that yet another year has passed by before you even knew it. A better alternative is to set CLEAR - Clear would mean Collaborative, Limited, Emotional, Appreciable, Refinable - goals.



Enjoy what you do. You need not wait for weekends to enjoy.

12 Daily Reminders

1. The past cannot be changed.
2. Opinions don’t define your reality
3. Everyone’s journey is different
4. Things always get better with time
5. Judgements are a confession of character
6. Overthinking will lead to sadness
7. Happiness is found within
8. Positive thoughts create positive things
9. Smiles are contagious
10. Kindness is free
11. You only fail if you quit
12. What goes around, comes around.

Ladies Coupe by Anita Nair

Trying to read this book some years back, but not being able to and having put this aside; for some reason was tempted to read this in full this Christmas season.

Well though not highly recommended; better than the three trending Engineering+MBA trending authors.

Something that I perceived, which I had not before were -

1) Though it speak of 5 ladies; it actually had stories of 10+ ladies and their (Anita Nair's) perceptions.
2) The train knew where it was headed. The train would stay awake while the passengers slept. The passengers need not tell the train what to do. (This resembeles life - we need to make choices; which there are in plenty - decision making matters; and when we feel we are not on the right track - change)
3) There are 5 elements that constitute life : and one can classify oneself into each of them - Like Margaret considered herself to be water.


The five ladies sharing Ladies Coupe were the old and experienced Janaki, Rich Prabha Devi, Margaret (Maragatham) the Chemistery Teacher, the young Sheela, poor (sister to the real thing) Marikolanthu, and the Central Character Akhilandeshwari or Akhila who sets out on a journey to Kanyakumari at the age of 45, single an income-tax clerk, who had to step into her fathers shoes, when he passed away; and was never allowed to live outside her roles as a daughter, sister, aunt a provider. She wonders: Can a woman stay single and be happy, or does a woman need a man to feel complete?

How does one know if one loves, hates or is merely indifferent to a man? How does one measure what one feels? Love is a colourless, volatile liquid. Love ignites and burns. Love leaves no residue - neither smoke nor ash. Love is a poison masquerading as the spirit of wine. Love beckons with a rare bouquet. Love demands your drink of it. And then love burns the tongue, the senses. Love blinds. Love maddens. Love separates reason from thought. Love kills. Those who can't have love have to settle for need. What is love if not a need disguised?

Do every womam desire for the meeting of the sperm and egg which are parts of the potential human life and create zygote the biological human life?

Once you stop worrying what the world will think of you, your life will become that much easier to live. You have to look out for yourself. No one else will.

Also the other women in the story are Akhila's mother - who married her Uncle, and was so much in love with him, that Akhil felt, if the couple are very much in love through out their life, their children would need to live the life of an orphan? Sarasa Mamai - when the head of the family dies, the family dies with him - will any mother want to go through what Sarasa Mamai had to? Karpagam - Akhila's friend - who made her dream and think of change. Sujatha Akka; Ladies K & L.

Well there are men as well - and I wonder if the cover page is Akhila waiting for Hair or is it the Ladies Coupe? Though had taken the book the second time to know the ending - it leave with a question mark.

Who made Akhila realise - Happiness is being allowed to choose one's own life, to live it the way one wants. Happiness is knowing one is loved and having someone to love. Happiness is being able to hope for tomorrow.

Women are not weak. Women are strong. Women can do everything as well as men. Women can do much more. But a woman has to seek that vein of strength in herself. It does not show itself naturally.

Akhila is Akhilandeswari decimated into ten entities:

Kali - Ready to destroy all that comes between her and the flow of time.

Tara - With the golden embryo from which a new universe will evolve. She will be her own void and infinity.

Sodasi - Fullness at sixteen. Nurturing dreams and hopes. Even now at 45.

Bhuvaneshwari - The forces of the material world surge within her.

Bhairavi - Seeking to find ways and means to fulfil her desires before all is null and void.

Chinnamasta - The naked one continuing the state of self - sustenance in the created world; making possible destruction and renewal in a cyclic order.

Dhumathi - Misfortune personified. An old hag riding an ass with a broom in one hand and a crow on her banner.

Bagala - The crane-headed one, the ugly side of all living creatures. Jealousy, hatred, curelty, she is all this and more.

Matangi - Seking to dominate.

Kamala - Pure consciousness of the self, bestowing boons and allaying fears...

Together and seperate this is Akhila.

End of yet another year...

The year began climing the Malayatoor hills - a wondeful trecking with sis and family - which Neil thoroughly enjoyed. View from atop a pristine hill is simply awesome; and for sis and family it ended up by the beach at Kovalam. The warm sun, calm water, and a great set of friends. For me it is a quite evening at home; being 3rd death anniversery of my father; besides his grave;a midnight bonfire might help? I remember:

Jab bhi tum khud ko akela mehsus karo to pareshan mat hona ... Bas apni ankhe band karna aur KHUDA se kehna ke kyu tune muje itna keemti banaya ke koi muje hasil hi nahi kar paaya....


Had lost my grand mother in the beginning of this year, not a shock, expected; So true...every mothers expect, pray and wish that her children will love each other long after she is gone....and many have left the world disappointed not being able to see this...What is the use of all rituals after death when one cannot be together when alive? What should we say and do with the people who try to bring barriers among the children - to the extend of declaring some of the siblings not alive, when they infact are; and other useless; except when they need them!! May the people doing this realise and pay for their folly.

What is the use of balming the discremination in the neighbourhood, when one cannot rectify it in ones own family?

Holiday week - the last week of the year, family time - Beginning with Neil's Bday and ending with Neil's Piranal; Achan's death anniversary and Amma's 60th Birthday in between; with Christman, New Year and Thiruvathira.

Thank you for all your support this year. Each of you have been valuable for me, in their own way, Not sure I’d survive without you! Yes, met so many of my old friends, had been to places, tasted variety food, saw the most number of cinema in theaters in my entire life till date and spend quality time with Ra of me.

Sending you best wishes for a happy and relaxing festive holiday.

Wishing you a very Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!!


Your's faithfully,

Bajirao Mastani

Bajirao Mastani is an enchanting, engrossing, entertaining but exhausting 2015 Indian epic historical romance film produced and
directed by Sanjay Leela Bhansali, who also composed the music score of the film. Bhansali's perspective, so there indeed is Bhansalisam in the movie.

Aakhir Dil hey hindustani, and heart goes to Kashi, somehow cannot appreicate Bajirao going behind Mastani - howsoever good she may be - and therefore can see a true concerned mother in Radhabhai - though could not justify the brahmins - if Mastani was his first love it would have made sense - but oh ya...Love is blind and when you fall in love, you do not realise if it is first or second or nth, right; nevertheless so are the lovers. Tanvi Azmi, who portrays the role of Radhabhai mother of Bajirao, was amazing, so where both Bajirao and Mastani.

Well, well, it appears that in the years gone by, or done, most men are akin Bajirao - and have Mastani's - Rich or poor, modern or traditional, famous or common man - Some have them in their life, and is known by all; for some it is a secret - open or hidden. This relationship might be known by many names - Sauthan, extra marital affair, 2nd wife or whatsoever. And its difficult to identify - who is Kashi and who is Masthani in a man's life. To name a few - Jawaharlal Nehru, Amithab Bachan, Aamir Khan...and the list would go on and on...

Don't know why some people go intolerant, without understanding or knowing the facts. Though the movie was released around the same time as Dilwale and I was confused on which one to watch, as I had time for only one; am glad that Bajirao was choosen over Dilwale. As whoever have seen Dilwale inspite of the bad review, have just given double negative feedback and have nothing good to say.

Nazar jo teri laagi main deewani ho gayi, Deewani haan deewani ho gayi, Mashoor mere ishq ki kahani ho gayi...Thank you for the tickets...Ladies(sister's) Friday night out was a memorable one.

Oh Yes, I'm Single!

Well happen to read this year, a kind of Chetan Bhagat & Rabinder Sing; this year it was Durjoy Datta; and this year it was among other books of his - book on his story or their story - Durjoy and Maanvi Ahuja.

Well, could be the freedom and life style they lead, which have them open to so many affairs since young age - which is now becoming universal. Indeed being around a person you love makes you complete, even if he does not care about you, or is an asshole. You just wait to hear that you are loved and pray for it day after day.

When you know the love of your life if not your's the world around you appear to crash. It is upto us on how we take it. Meeting, breaking and meeting and imaginary ring. Once bitten twice shy.

Secrets to healthy Relationship

While it's true that it takes two persons in love, who trust and respect each other, to make a happy relationship, science has proved that it takes something more than love and companionship to make a relationship long-lasting.

1) Don't rush into things: The longer couples date before marriage, the greater their odds of staying together. (But there is no gurantee that they would stay)

2) Avoid expensive weddings: The duration of marriage is inversely proportional to money spent on the wedding. Debt stress is a common post-wedding phenomenon that usually eats into a relationship.

3) Cuddle up together: Couples who sleep close together are way more happier than those who don't.

4) Say "thank you": Being appreciative of the other's efforts and struggles tend to be more successful. It leads to an understanding, caring and responsive atmosphere in the relationship.

5) Be honest

6) Small gestures count : Like tight hug, a kiss, a cup of tea or an unexpected gift

7) Marriage not the only key to happiness: Cohabiting couples share the same advantage as married ones.

8) Long-distance relationships do work: These couples are likely to have deep bonding than those who are physically closer.

9) Look for a partner, not a soul mate

10) Having kids is not a compulsion: Have kids only if you think you can devote time to their upbringing and share the responsibilities with your partner.

11) Be kind: Long-lasting relationships require two essential traits: kindness and generosity.

12) Share your experiences: Going for a walk, exploring new places together or dining at new restaurants can make couples more understanding of each other.

13) Work on positive interactions: Giving compliments or showing appreciation towards the actions of your partner is important.

14) Share your laughter: Giggling in tandem is an indicator of the relationship's well being.

15) Talk as much as possible: At least 5 or more hours a week.

16) Stay fit: Being physically unfit put pressure on a relationship.

17) Give up texting

18) Drink like your partner: Its important that both partners drink in equal amounts or don't drink at all.

19) Surround yourself with happy couples

20) Be sexually active

21) Limit your friendship: couples who have a lot of mutual friends are more likely to break up, while couples whose friend circles don't overlap much stay together longer.

22) Sleep like a baby : sound sleep and happy relationship are directly proportional.

23) Share your chores : Share your responsibility.

24) Have similar spending habbits.

Easy to say - Difficult to practise.

Gujarathi Wedding Eve - A memorable experience

Had an eventful weekend, attending Gujarathi wedding of Pooja and Kunal. May there be showers of blessings on both of them. Their wedding was, simple, elegant and lively. There was lot of splendor, colours, dance, dazzlingly décor, traditional ritualism, and fun. Indeed it was very colorful and vibrant.

Sangeeth ceremony

On Saturday had been for the Sangeeth night before wedding., and wanted to return early – but the function was so mesmerizing that I ended up being my true self – A born spectator. It began with
• Dandiya – the traditional Gujarati dance which is performed by family members, with two sticks, and two circles, one moving clock wise and the other moving anti – clockwise. This ceremony gives chance for both families to meet, greet and know each other well. It was an opportunity for people to interact with as many people and know them.
• Other Dance – There were other dance like Bhangda, and Bollywood dance with D.J. Songs.
• Cake Cutting & Ring Exchange - There was cake cutting and ring exchange between the would be bride and groom. Both of them looked stunning in their traditional costume.
• Games – There was special game arranged for the bride and groom; with 10 set of questions asked, with both of them sitting facing opposite directions, and had to lift different hands if they agreed or disagreed. The would be couple scored 7 out of 10.
• Food/Dinner – Simple and yummy my mouth still waters, when I think of them – Masala Dosha, Chole Bhature and Tomato rice; followed by deserts being gulab jamun and icecream.

Wedding ceremony


On Sunday, it was soothing to see the colourfully decorated Mandap with soothing colours and few flowers with the four pillars – made of brass (presumably) pots kept one above the other, that surround the mandap representing the parents of the bride and groom. This signifies the important part they have played in raising their children to become the responsible adults they are today.

Chaats to welcome the guest, followed by yummy lunch and tea/coffee with Vadas – Batata Veda and Medhu veda.

• Barat – on the wedding day groom arrives on horse dressed in traditional attaire and family members dance in surrounding on the traditional music of band. Not sure if it happened as such, as we arrived after that.
• Ponkhana (welcoming the groom) – the groom is welcomed by brides family in traditional way where brides mother perform aarti and pulls him playfully by grabing his nose. Groom then step forward by crushing earthen pots into small pieces this signifies that groom has power to overcome any obstacles in his married life
• Ganesh Pooja – after the groom is welcomed to the mandap the ceremonies start whith prayer of lord ganesh who is know are aradhya daivat (god of peace, happiness and prosperity). ceremony begins with the worship of Lord Ganesh, deity of peace and wisdom. This is done so people can find strength within themselves to remove any obstacles that may arise..
• Madhuparka – the brides father wash grooms feet with honey, yoghurt and ghee. This is the time when sister and cousins of groom steel shoes and groom have to offer some money and take it back. Did not witness this either.
• Kanya Agman (brides arrival) – the bride arrives with her maternal uncle (mama) on the mandap when she reaches mandap there is curtain (antarpath) in between of bride and groom which separates them from each other
• Jaimala – during the arrival of bride the priest begins the ceremony by saying mangalashtak and then antarpath is lower and the couple exchange the garlands
• Kanya dan – the ritual is that parents give (dan) their daughter (goddess laxmi) to the groom (lord Vishnu). Parents give away their daughter by keeping her hand onto the grooms hand.
• Varmala – cord is tied around the neck of bride and groom and looped around 24 time by the elders in family. This means the couple is safe from any negative energy or evil
• Hasta Milap – the scarf wore by groom is tied to the scarf of bride this is known as meeting of soul. The petals of flowers and rice grains are shower on them during this ceremony.
• Mangal Pheres – brother of bride is asked to put some rice on the hands of bride and groom and pour it in hawan. The bride and groom take four circles around the hawan (fire) signifying the promise to be with each other, good health and prosperity, blessings, love and loyalty. During this ritual the priest recite some mantra. After which the bride and groom runs and sit on the chair, it is been said that whoever sits first will rule the house for life time.
• Saptapadi – during this ceremony the groom helps bride to touch 7 betel nuts with her right toes by chanting seven mantra in which he request for support from his wife in ups and downs of their life. This is the most important rite of the entire ceremony. Here the bride and the groom take seven steps together around the sacred fire (Agni) and make the following seven promises to each other: As per the Vedic rituals, the groom sings "With God as our guide, let us take":
1. The first step to nourish each other
2. The second step to grow together in strength
3. The third step to preserve our wealth
4. The fourth step to share our joys and sorrows
5. The fifth step to care for our children
6. The sixth step to be together forever
7. The seventh step to remain lifelong friends
8. The perfect halves to make a perfect whole!
The Satapadi ceremony concludes with a prayer that the union is indissoluble.
• Sindoor Daan – The groom puts red powder on brides head and ties mangalsutra around her neck which symbolize that she is married and belong to him.
• Kansar – the bride and groom feed sweets to each other after this all rituals have been done (this varies from tradition to tradition).
• Akhanda Saubhagyavati Bhava – here any seven womens are called to give blessing to newly married couple. These womens bless bride as akhanda saubhagyavati bhava which means that may your husband live long life and be with you forever.
• Ashirwad – The newlyweds take blessing from elders by touching their feet.

Post wedding functions


Gifts are exchanged between families
• Vidaai – This ceremony is about departure of couple which include tears of joy and sadness as the bride is departing for her new home leaving her old memories back.
• Ghar Nu Laxmi – The bride is welcome in her new home as Laxmi who will bring happiness and prosperity in their house. The mother-in-law place a matka or steel vessel filled with rice and ask bride to enter the new world by touching vessel with right foot.

Glad could be part of some, though not all the events – and wishing the newly wedded couple all joy.


All said and done, howsoever strong a women is, how much soever she may claim that she would not cry at her wedding day, it is an emotional day, an emotional moment. Not only the girl, those closely related to her also end up crying. This I have seen in post of the Indian weddings....all over the country, irrespective of the state or religion; except for a had few of them.

Talk Less. Talk Sense.

Yet again, just after a year; time to rethink and reiterate on what was written then - Communication is the link pin of every relationship - personal or professional. We need to ask question when required, seek for help when needed, KMS - Keep our mouth shut at the appropriate time. Most important of all, know when to do what!

1. Introduction: Do not use unnecessary adjectives when introducing others. Be specific and to the point. Ensure that there are no casual remarks.

2. Feedback: Do not give unsolicited feedbacks. As a boss you are bound to give feedback to your team members. In case you have to give a negative or bad feedback, be calm, and give it in a sandwiched fashion, adding some good points and tips for improvement. So also when you take feedback. In case you do not agree, ask for clarification, don’t argue. Be polite – and you could just say – “Thank you, but No Thank you.”

3. Confidentiality: This is the most important thing to remember. Whenever someone confides in you some confidential matter, ensure that you do not discuss it with any one. Remember, even wall have ears. If you breach confidentiality, your relationship would go for a toss for ever.

4. Hierarchy: In professional life; there are no friends, only colleagues. It is important to respect hierarchy. It is good to appear to be friendly with people at all level. But in case you talk about anything negative about your direct reports to the people reporting to them, it would be of great risk. Also we should not try to ask them, what our direct reports think about us bluntly as it would create a feeling of our lack of confidence. We need to ask it in a diplomatic manner as to ‘what do you think is the feedback about me on the floor?’

5. Problem: When you need to communicate problems, remember your boss or team members would be happy to hear about probable solutions, and not just a blunt problem statement. Ensure that you have some tips to overcome a problem, when you deliver it.

If a pen is mightier than sword; action speaks louder than words. The man of few words, have lesser risk of creating enemies. Why not try to be one?

Weight Loss Tips in 19 Simplest Ways to Lose Fat

Weight loss cannot be achieved in a day or two, it takes more time than we can imagine. It’s a process, and your body needs to adapt to the changes that you make to your routine, exercises and to your diet.

1) Get enough sleep:

Not only healthy dose of sound sleep will normalize your metabolism, which is one of the essential "ingredients" of healthy weight loss, but also, good rest will reduce your stress levels and prevent you from "emotional" eating

2) Eating more often, but smaller meals can boost your metabolism, helping you lose weight almost effortlessly.

3) Not only healthy breakfast can supply you with the boost of energy in the morning, but also, it will help to keep your hunger at bay later during the day, so that you will snack less. Go for the mix of fresh fruits, protein and whole grains, when preparing your breakfast

4) Exercising can efficiently help you to lose weight, but what can add even more of a boost to your working out routine is a good, rhythmic, energizing music.

5) Avoid drinking soda and other sugary drinks, because they are packed with plenty of calories and sugar, that you don’t even notice.

6) Reduce the size of your portions of cakes, pasteries, chapathis, doshas and rice.

7) Exercise: jogging, walking, step aerobics, swimming, bicycling, elliptical burner, dancing, zumba and house cleansing.

8) Don’t skip meals

9) A 7 days healthy diet plan can definitely help - make sure to include fruits, vegetables, lean proteins and whole grains into your list.

10) Include freshly made soups into your diet

11) Using smaller plates is a psychological trick that can help you to eat less and, therefore, shed extra pounds.

12) Limiting your calorie intake can definitely help you to lose that extra weight; for this purpose you would probably need to plan all your meals in advance, based on your daily calorie needs

13) Drinking a glass of water before eating can help you feel full quicker and this, with less food.

14) First of all, never go grocery shopping hungry. Second, avoid going to those areas of the grocery store, where you can be tempted to buy cookies, chips, ice-creams, sodas, pizzas and other unhealthy, fattening and processed foods.

15) Going to restaurants on a regular basis can tremendously increase your weight, therefore, try to cut down on restaurants or be prepared to make healthier choices when you order: chose lean meat or fish with a salad, instead of pasta or pizza, and have a fruit salad for dessert, instead of an ice-cream or a cake.

16) If you feel hungry between your meals, snack on fresh fruits, berries and fresh vegetables. These healthy snacks will help boost your metabolism and nourish your body with vitamins, healthy nutrients and fiber, helping you lose weight the healthy way.

17) Water is a very important “ingredient” of healthy weight loss, not only it can help boost your metabolism, but also, water can provide you with the feeling of full stomach. Often, when we feel hungry, we are, actually, thirsty. Therefore, make sure to drink, at least, 8 glasses of water every day, especially, if you are serious about shedding those extra pounds.

18) Stop eating at least 3-4 hours before going to sleep.

19) Weigh yourself every 3 days (but don’t do it too often though), it will help you to monitor your weight loss and stay motivated.

Stay beautiful and treasure yourself!

5 Lessons from Aisha

What a way to start a sunday - Listening to an aweinspiring video talk by Aisha Chaudhry, daughter of Niren Chaudhry who heads YUM Restaurants in India (parent compan that owns brands like Pizza, Hut, KFC & Tacobell) Aisha passed away at teh age of 18. Sad but hugely inspiring story of her life can be heard at https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=pFExgTJzEV4

Due to illness, life full of challenges, she would feel like she was in the middle of a shipwreck.

1. Believe in Miracles - Good things that are unlikely to happen. Believe in them, and they will happen.
2. Always live in the moment - Think of the things that you could do & do the things you can. Don't keep worrying of the things you can't do.
3. In every difficulty one can always find an opportunity - Enjoy that.
4. Never forget to dream - The power of the mind is limitless - All things happen twice, ones in the mind, and ones in reality.
5. If everything else fails, get a dog.

There is always someting in life to be grateful for. My soul would not have rainbows if my eyes did not have tears.

What is Wrong with the World?

As we have more, we want more. Or else how could we describe what is wrong with the world?

“Three-BHK flat Sheena ko mil gaya hai,” were the first words that Indrani Mukherjee uttered after murdering her 24-year-old daughter Sheena Bora in cold blood.

Was Aarushi murdered by her parents?

What is the real story behind Diana's murder?

Incidents like rape, murder, riots, have become part and parcel of most of the society. 'God's own Country' is also not spared.

Soumya, a 23-year-old woman commuter of Ernakulam-Shoranur passenger train (56608) found in an unconscious state in woods near the Vallathol Nagar Railway Station on February 1 between 9-30 p.m. and 10 p.m. She succumbed to injuries at the Thrissur Government Medical College Hospital on February 6 around 3 p.m. On February 3, the police took into custody Govindachamy, 30, of Virudhachalam in Cuddalore. According to the prosecution, he tried to rob Soumya in the women’s compartment, smashed her head against the wall when she resisted, pushed her hands into the gap of a closing door and threw her out of the train. He jumped out of the speeding train, walked 200 metres to find her lying in a pool of blood. He carried her to woods near the rail track and raped her.

Is this the truth?

Can rich buy anything?

All this in a span of 6 hours.. Across the globe:

Lebanon: Twin suicide bombing, about 30 killed, few injured.
Paris: Under attack, explosions, at least 26 dead, 60 held hostage.
Japan: Powerful 7.0 magnitude earthquake has struck off the South West cost of Japan, a Tsunami warning.
Baghdad: 18 people killed, 41 injured, in suicide bomb attack on funeral.

Heavy rain in places which has scanty rainfall - with no name or chance of stopping.

No we cannot buy everything. If at all people would realise this. Our mother earth has sufficient for all, if at all, we would realise it. If at all we would understand and enjoy living in the borderless world, and really do so in peace.

Family

Though was brought up in a small flat, in a metro; we always had some or the other members from our extended family with us; in our nuclear family; and with father always telling us stories of his childhood, and mother wanting to visit her parents and native land; it was my childhood dream to find a job in our native land when grown up. It was a time when there were not many job opportunities in Kerala, and people used to go out of Kerala in search of job. When my mother would ask me how will I find a job in Kerala, I would say, somebody has promised me. She was pussled and wanted to know who it was? On lot of persistence - I finally would say, well 'G' has promised me. So the discussion would continue on who the 'G' was.

Our family was large, both on my father and mothers side.

My father had 7 siblings, he had brothers - one elder and one younger than him, and 5 sisters - 2 elder and 3 younger than him. Between them they had 21 children. His youngest sister, and elder sisters daughter were almost of the same age. My mother with her 4 siblings - was the first to have child in her family; so I was the darling of my maternal grandparents. Especially on my mother’s side my grandmother was very close to her eight siblings, and therefore with her. Their father had passed away when they were young, and it was their mother, who had no siblings, brought them up. They were very closely netted family. Between my grandfather and his three siblings, there were again many relatives who lived around their small house. My normally stern grandfather, was a terror but very loving. So also my Paternal grandparents. Very interesting. My grandfather had his siblings in Ernakulam, and he worked in forest. While grandmother had acres of land. It was fun to go around the places, litting dried coconut leaves.

Not from a very rich family, we had our tough times, but days went on, with fights and reconcilations being part of daily life. With passing time, we moved to Kerala. I completed my studies, and got a job in 'God's own Country', as desired.

But saw the huge families drifting apart. Now as I do not have any of my grandparents around, and even my father I ponder on the life gone by. About the Child who did not have time or interest to have food with his mother even once during her last 10 years, but was there to conduct all her last rituals, of a brother who had to die in an orphanage, and another who was drawned in the village pond. Were these something avoidable?

Why blame others for misunderstandings and quarrels? Cancer is in the body and mind...For the India and Pakistan quarrell is England to be blamed? Is this what I really wanted? What could be done by one singe soul? What is the goal that I could find?

Life Lesson : From Living Abroad Alone!

Travel had always fancied me, but it was always with someone for company during international travells, though in India; I had traveled alone. This year, had the privelage of doing that as well.

Living abroad is going to make you a little more confident and a little less fearful. And if you get a chance to live that life, go for it.

Living abroad teaches you to appreciate what you had back home.You like the fact that India is probably cheaper and you have endless support there. (You might miss the food, but not me).

You will walk on empty roads, fall in love with a local, read a book under the sun, dress up differently. You’ll do things you have never done before.

You will be cautious of your bank balance. You will learn to do everything on your own.

You will stop cribbing about little things. You'll become wise and humble. You will get rid of unreasonable ideas. Most of all, you'll become realistic.

You will know what it feels like to kiss on a street and not have people stare at you. You might want to have someone with you. But Solitude is also addictive. Once you see how peaceful it is , you don't want to deal with people.

You might, just want to come back; or might never want to come back or might want to shuttle. Whatever you feel, you do learn few life lessons, when you are alone, abroad.

Joby Mathew : An inspiring Life

Joby Mathew...great to read about you and privileged to have a friend like you...keep achieving new heights. Having worked as the Guest Relations office at Veegaland, aiming to qualify as an IAS officer, today we have him a physically challenged person by birth with 60% disabilities, a height of only 3 feet 5 inches and severely under-developed legs, which is a condition caused by Proximal Fimoral Focal Deficiency PFFD, has won medals at multiple international events. Various events that he has won medals at both general category and disabled category include arm wrestling, fencing, athletics, and body building

He is blessed with a lovely family - wife a professional dancer and two sons. Joby, who works for the Bharat Petroleum Corporation as a sports trainer.

He has been driving all across in his specillay designed Santro.

P - with the alphabet is all you need!

Pappu, Pappa, Parent,
Pant, Panther, Pantaloons,
Personality, Psychopathy, Post,
Piano, Prince, Princess,
Play, Parasail,paraglide,
Print, Pun, Politics,
Projects, President, Preside,
Preserve, Persevere, Perspire,
Pardon, Pals, Put,
Pretend, Pacific, Pacifier,
Paid, Paijamas, Paint,
Panic, Pale, Pail,
Planning, Pageant, Paris,
Passport, Peppers, Patio,
Paddling, Paradise, Party,
Penguine, Pansies, Protect,
Pen, Page, Press,
Potty, Penetrate, Personify,
Park, Partridges, Patter,
Pace, Perform, Pressure,
Pancakes, Porridge, Pork,
Pear, Pagoda, Pie,
Pooped, Perfect, Purple,
Pumpkins, Pig, Puffy,
Parrot, plump, pear,
Pink, Posies, Pretty,
Priya, Playmate, Publish,
Pot, Puppies, Play!
Pray, Prayer, Peace!!!

Eyes

While your eyes speak volumes of how you feel, the very shape of our eyes can reveal a lot about you?

“Eyes are the windows to the soul…” The face is the portrait of the mind, the eyes-its informer

1. If your eyes are bigger than the rest of your facial features, you have big eyes. They not only look appealing but also are the mark of someone who is receptive to the conscious and subconscious. You have an open mind and approachable personality. It is easy to open up to people like these. They are warm and welcoming.


2. If your eyes are samll You are precise and love details and observant and love to gain expertise over matters that interest you. You are farsighted and focused. You don’t trust people easily and can often be misunderstood as cold and arrogant.

3. Almond eye shape looks exotic and holds deep mystery and appeal. You are warm and compassionate, but you keep your cool and don’t let emotions out of control. You stay composed and attentive at most times.

4. People with Round eyes are very creative and artsy. You stay lost in imagination and have Strong ideologies. You are dreamy and moody and can border on impracticality. You often get carried away by your emotions and find it tough to keep your thoughts and feelings to yourself. Your charm is such that even though you can hurt people with your sharp tongue, they are attracted to you again.

5. People who have close set eyes are staunch believers in customs, history and traditions. They respect the old world beliefs and can sometimes be very stubborn. They are focused and hard working but can be very resistant, even stressed because of even little changes in their lives

6. Peope with wide set eye are extremely adventurous and experimental. You love trying out the latest trends, be it fashion or lifestyle. You love freedom and cannot easily stick to a routine. You find love and success in areas where there is a lot of freedom and liberty allowed.

7. If you have deep set eyes that seem to be a bit sunken, you are intense and captivating. You are passionate and romantic and have great analyzing skills. You like to keep things private and are a keen observer.


8. People with eyes that bulge out a little like to stay protected in a circle of close friends. They are sensitive but very approachable. They love meeting new people and are warm. However, they get worried easily and stay stressed. Pessimism is also one of their negative traits.


9. People with upward slanting eye/Cat eye are Ambitious and witty, determined and focused. You like to achieve what you have set your eyes on! Your company is fun and interesting as you are a great conversationalist, but people may see you as an opportunist and maybe slightly selfish.


10. People with downward slanting eye have a closed circle of friends, you don’t trust easily and can get pessimistic. Your self-confidence is dwindling and is easily dominated. You can’t say NO easily and can get very needy and brooding. However, you make friends for a lifetime.

Search deeper and the biggest mysteries of mankind will unravel themselves for you!

This blog ‘What does the shape of your eyes say about your personality?‘ was originally published on LimeRoad Blog.

My First English Movie in the theater: SPECTRE

The 24th movie of the James Bond series, and my first ever English movie - that I had been watching in a theater - Is'nt that a good choice. That too at mid-night. Is it me?

Well, I had been travelling across Mexico’s famed Day of the Dead parade, Rome’s cobbled streets, Swiss Alps, dreamy Tangier and to a lit-up London (just reminding me of being there a couple of months before - Westminister Bridge - and I did walk over that, at mid night, viewing the wonderfully lit London city). Wanting me to go to the Himalayas and the Thar deserts of Rajasthan even more...Movie takes us through all the past Bond movies, the pretty ladies, villains, and the cars....retuned in 'One piece'. An all inclusive recaping Bond movie and a softer Daniel Craig. In Spectre, there is the introduction of a personal history element to Bond, rumoured to be his last film. Dr Swann (Lea Seydoux) is more sugar than spice, unlike the other Bond girls.

The James Bond series focuses on a fictional British Secret Service agent created in 1953 by writer Ian Fleming, who featured him in twelve novels and two short-story collections. Since Fleming's death in 1964, eight other authors have written authorised Bond novels or novelizations. This have been made movies as well beginning with Sean Connery, and going through George Lazenby, Roger Moore, Timothy Dalton, Pierce Brosnan and Daniel Craig, James Bond movies,

It all began with 'Dr. No' which was the first 007 film produced by EON Productions. Bond is sent to Jamaica to investigate the death of MI6 agent John Strangways. He finds his way to Crab Key island, where the mysterious Dr. No awaits. Also was born, the series of Bond Girl beginning with Honey Ryder and her breath taking entry, unforgettable.

This film also introduced the criminal organisation SPECTRE, which would also appear in several subsequent films.

James Bond followers know that Specter is not new. In the 4th movie, Thunderball, Emilio Largo, the Number 2 at SPECTRE, has stolen two nuclear warheads. He threatens to destroy a city in the United States and England unless a large ransom is paid. Bond is sent to the Bahamas to investigate.

James Bond films are known for their iconic theme songs. From the twanging guitar of the original instrumental theme, to Shirley Bassey's strong vocals, many of the songs have been successes in their own rights. Even this one had a charm of its own. But nothing to beat the original.

Rani Padmini

The poster pre release, and the movie Summer in Bethleham,tempted me to go for Rani Padmini all by myself - first of a malayalam movie.

Nothing much in the script, but Rani Padmini brings into light, how wonderful our country is...You need not travell outside India, to view snow cladded mountains and beautiful peaks.The movie is about Padmini & Rani's adventurous journey through the northern India and the scenic locations. Padmini a traditional girl from Kerala moves to Delhi after getting married and meets tomboyish Rani in the bus, when she is on her way to find her husband Giri who is participating in a car rally in Himalaya.

The "flying" moments of Rani and Padmini with their wet eyes show how happy one can be with a pinch of freedom in their life. Somewhere the movie has traces of 'Queen' as well. If you watch it with too much of expectation, there is nothing much in it,but if you would love to view the locations, go for it.

It definitely took me to Delhi and Schliersee Germany.

Songs are soothing - not many.
01. Varu Pokaam Parakkaam
02. Oru Makaranilavay
03. Puthu Puthu
04. Mizhimalarukal



The Child artists- though only in the first song, were awesome, and so were Ramesh & Suresh.

Catch 22 - Joseph Heller

At the heart of Catch-22 resides the incomparable, malingering bombardier, Yossarian, a hero endlessly inventive in his schemes to save his skin from the horrible chances of war.

His problem is Colonel Cathcart, who keeps raising the number of missions the men must fly to complete their service. Yet if Yossarian makes any attempts to excuse himself from the perilous missions that he's committed to flying, he's trapped by the Great Loyalty Oath Crusade, the bureaucratic rule from which the book takes its title: a man is considered insane if he willingly continues to fly dangerous combat missions, but if he makes the necessary formal request to be relieved of such missions, the very act of making the request proves that he's sane and therefore ineligible to be relieved.

Yossarian is furious that his life is in constant danger through no fault of his own. He has a strong desire to live and is determined to be immortal or die trying. As a result, he spends a great deal of his time in the hospital, faking various illnesses in order to avoid the war. Yossarian is placed in ridiculous, absurd, desperate, and tragic circumstances—he sees friends die and disappear, his squadron get bombed by its own mess officer, and colonels and generals volunteer their men for the most perilous battle in order to enhance their own reputations.

Catch-22 can be found in the novel throughout the characters’ stories, —for instance, the ability of the powerful officer Milo Minderbinder to make great sums of money by trading among the companies that he himself owns.

A number of secondary stories unfold around Yossarian. His friend Nately falls in love with a whore from Rome and woos her constantly, despite her continued indifference.When Yossarian brings her the bad news of Nately's death, she blames him for Nately’s death and tries to stab him every time she sees him thereafter.

The novel draws to a close as Yossarian, troubled by Nately’s death, refuses to fly any more missions. He wanders the streets of Rome, encountering every kind of human horror—rape, disease, murder. He is eventually arrested for being in Rome without a pass, and his superior officers, Colonel Cathcart and Colonel Korn, offer him a choice. He can either face a court-martial or be released and sent home with an honorable discharge. There is only one condition: in order to be released, he must approve of Cathcart and Korn and state his support for their policy, which requires all the men in the squadron to fly eighty missions. Although he is tempted by the offer, Yossarian realizes that to comply would be to endanger the lives of other innocent men. He chooses another way out, deciding to desert the army and flee to neutral Sweden. In doing so, he turns his back on the dehumanizing machinery of the military, rejects the rule of Catch-22, and strives to gain control of his own life.

A concern for one's own safety in the face of dangers that are real and immediate is the process of a rational mind.
In addition to the theme of sanity in insane world, two of the other main themes of Joseph Heller's Catch-22 are its obvious anti-war messages and its view of heroes and heroism. Cowards become heroes (Aarfy, Milo Minderbinder) and heroes are labeled as cowards.

Probably the best examples of Heller's anti-war stance come when Orr finally succeeds in bailing out and sailing away; and when Yossarian discovers Orr's success and decides to try to duplicate the feat. Persevere and Perspire to achieve what you want.

Dark triadic personality traits

Three dark triadic personality traits are Narcissism, psychopathy and Machiavellianism.

Narcissism is the pursuit of gratification from vanity or egotistic admiration of one's own attributes. The term originated from Greek mythology, where the young Narcissus fell in love with his own image reflected in a pool of water.

Psychopathy also known as—though sometimes distinguished from—sociopathy is traditionally defined as a personality disorder characterized by enduring antisocial behavior, diminished empathy and remorse, and disinhibited or bold behavior.

Machiavellianism is one of the dark triad personalities, characterized by a duplicitous interpersonal style, a cynical disregard for morality and a focus on self-interest and personal gain.

Typically not the sort of person you’d want to hang out with – but these traits are not only present, but even common among humankind, so one need to know about them.

Talvar : Aarushi whodunit

Meghana Gulzar's "Talvar" a classic satire, based on the 2008 Aarushi Talwar murder India's most gripping whodunit, will leave you pondering over our systems & bureaucracy. Though it would not answer to your thoughts on who would be the murderer, it is well made and if you don't take it lightly will leave you disturbed.

Everyone you meet in life is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Relationships are complicated. Every story has multiple sides. You cannot judge a person by perception. We need to have privacy for our family from outsiders. When you get into trouble it multiplies, and there are people to make fun of you, and make money out of your situation where possible.



Take it as any othe movie, well casted, well narrated and worth a watch. Life goes on...whatever will be, will be...Well, well it is not just the future which is no ones to see, but even the past.

I know, my empathy might lead me into trouble one day, I have been listening to 'Mera Kuch Saman' and looking forward to see the movie Ijaazat. Also it was interesting to watch the movie, sitting in between my Williams Lea Colleagues, when in fact, I had planned to go all alone; then had a company who arranged and facilitated and then a group. Planned or unplanned...Things happen...

From Moors to the Countess of York via the Cliffs & Sis

In addition to my sister in UK well if it was the Moors calling before...It was the Countess of York this time via the Cliffs......calling.

An incredible reminiscence with Sharyn again picking from the railway station to dropping me again....talking and chatting and meeting her daughter.

It was a blessing to see her office as well this time -

Which indeed was quite inspiring;
Wishing her all the best and success in her new venture professionally
in addition to her personal life and with her home which is an art gallery. This time around met both her sisters and their children as well in addition to Ginni.

Missed her father who went fishing, in between the last visit and this one.

We have had some common losses.Though was double minded about going to the cliffs - glad that we finally did it-
A breathtaking view and evening it was.
Mismerising walk toward the light house with cliff on one side and golf court on the other.

Glad that I lived that moment of peace, calmth and serenity.Humming I am the mountain, I am the sea.

It was lovely to hear the Seagulls chirriping and good to see various other animals and birds enroute. Missed the beautiful full moon, like the last time- but had lovely sunset
Next day morning I stood like a tree without leaves - was sad to see this tree had lost its leaves

Finally the reunion - Sharyn, Vanessa, Claire and Me...and dream come true.

Nothing like this for high tea..a combo with classy utensils and location, with a great team. Glad to see Gareth in the office - Rubbish - Not all can be in touch always.

And the good bye once again for a week; but presents with thought full words and directions for the future, and presents for her Indian Mom, sis and family....To meet again soon, we departed.


Thanks to my lovely sis and this beautiful historic country side for calling me, Love you.

Mumbai Here I Come...

Mumbai Mere Jaan...here I come finally on the 21st of August..but just for 3 days..in Kalyan and at School on Friday with my schoolis.With Geeta Mishra from and to Kelkars and Thanks for being the coordinator of my all trip and around airport with Juhi Gupta and Goregon/Malad cousins on Sunday..

Thanks to Geetha for coordinating everything-
Lovely to be Back to School and meet my Schoolies..Holy Cross Khi Kudiyas and our dearest Teachers who have a great role in who we are today...Sad that could not meet all as expected; but am extremely Thankful to those who could make it in coordinating, by their presence and giving us a memorable time. As I could not be part of many of these before; can understand how it feels when you really want to make it and cannot. For those who could not make it; there are at times 'Next Time'. Fingures crossed..let us have a mega one soon and I be able to be part of it. Went with Ritanjali to Shahad Birla Mandir and to meet some teachers, though could not meet all. Stayed at my cousin Jayan Chettans house that night in Kalyan and was off to meet old neighbours and some family friends next day morning, though was continuously sneezing and had a bad headache. Glad to meet Rema aunty and Usha and Raju chettan as well. But missed meeting so many.

Loved to be back to college...Wish I could spend more time with you Geeta Mishra and with your mom and family too.....Am very grateful to you for all that you have been doing for me since last one month.coordinating my visit,shopping and arranging things for me..wish we could spend more time together...so see you soon in Kerala....

So kind of Prasanth and Neha to come and pick me from Thane and take me to Malad on Saturday night, though missed Powai and meeting few of my colleagues, Sunday at Goregon was awesome.Meeting Geetha Aunty is never enough- her talks; achama, Prabha uncle being to both Priya and Prashanth's house,awesome kids - Sloka, Kavya, and Niranth meeting Deedhi, Krupali - her daughter and off couse my Eshan - Still his Maushi lingers in my ears.

Great..I could make a complete valuable use of my vacation.. being time constraint could make it , giving time to all those I love and also those who love me too..this was a commendable one..Mumbai airport was awesome and Prasanth and Suku came to drop me at the airport - did not know how the time just flew away.

Missed meeting so many of my colleagues, hope we have a next time...

London - 2nd Innings - Ich will hier Bleiben!

My Art Beats - Naveen

Could you just skip these paintings? If not, just imagine how the actuals would have been? And could you just say one which is your favourate? For each his own or multiple right...

As the only thing better than singing is more singing, a picture is worth a thousand words.

Truely blessed are the people with special skills to paint, sing, dance, play...And an artist might need appreciation!

And I felt specially blessed when an artist - Naveen painted for me three sketches and 10 beautiful paintings in a short span of around 10 days...

Words fail to describe them....

Thank You! Thank You! Thank You! Naveen for these..

There could not have been more personalised gifts than these!

These are done by my colleague at Williams Lea...I am privelaged to be his first customer.

Look out for his Face book page - 'My Art Beats'..

The Ra of Me....

Ah! Never realised this!

So many Ra's of Me...

Indeed so my name!!!

The name and numerology book say - our name and Date of Birth has a great impact on our life.

So may be some consider naming children based on the timing of birth and corresponding alphabet.

Once there was a Me..

And this me now has always Ra's...

My name meaning say:

Me - Is a word of Hebrew Origin Meaning -FAITHFUL &
Era- Is a word of Hebrew Origin Meaning - Protecterness

Life must go on

We are busy making plans, but God has something planned for us.

A humble request - please keep the handful of people I really have in my life happy and healthy. I am tired of being tired; and seeing my dears unhealthy.

Why is it that since I have read and really appreciated that - Health is the first of life - we are all unhealthy and untill then all were healthy?

Inspite of all this Life is going on, and must go on. Unbeliveably old I have become in last two years both physically and metally - Keeping a smile on my face - No matter the time or effort - To the best of my ability - Yet with lot of negative feedbacks.

Indeed it is so consoling and motivating to hear positive feedbacks at time when one is alive - Very true we need to keep aside our ego in order to do that!

"It's so weird how we start thinking, reading, wondering, about a person when he is gone forever. We start looking to know about them more when they are no more!! Sad but true!!It's rightly said " don't take things for granted because they might not be there tomorrow" - Ritu Chopra in FB.

From the bottom of my heart - my humble request - My dear God! Please no more deaths & Losses for some time now; or I would really break down!

How beautifully has the 9th standard girl written - Ishitha - My Schoolie Preetha's daughter, and this has brought tears in my eyes:

He's not dead,
No, he is not,
Only the body left the world,
The soul will always stay in our heart...

He wasthe devottee of science,
He the missile man,
I don't know about others,
But every Indian is surely his fan.

He was the best president,
With only one vision,
To make India eminant,
And he worked hard for his mission.

He saw vision 2020,
We will surely complete his desire,
He is our role model,
The person who gave us 'Wings on fire'

We know you are no more,
But we will keep your thoughts alive,
And as being the new Youth,
To live upto your vision we will strive.

For right now, everyone is mute,
Sir- to you, we all give a ground salute!

This is the only real truth of life - Everything that is born, has to die!

DIGITAL DETOX

Thanks to technology...for all the good things that it has done to mankind...Guess it is how we use it that matter...Balance is the need of the hour; true we need trees to live and not wi-fi's ...

Reading a post of a friend in Facebook made me look into interent on more regarding this topic and courtesy technology this is the view:

Our ability to stay balanced in this time of exponential technological growth, and create healthy relationships with our digital devices is the need of the hour.

Everywhere you see people are all looking at their phones,texting,e-mails, taking pictures etc. This world can be a better place by communicating with the person beside you. I have been hurt many a times, when I have wanted to talk to people but they have been busy with their technology devices, so also I have hurt many of them - My Mother the most.

May I disagree with those who say no or criticise the technology devises, in a gentle way? I understand the sentiments expressed, there can be no substitute for living, breathing humanity. A real hug in real life from a real friend is worth more than a million 'likes' on facebook. But as long as we use social media to enhance real friendships I think it can be a power for good. I am talking to you right now, through this media, it doesn't mean I can't have friends in real life, it means we can keep in touch with each other, share our thoughts, our dreams, our photos, and where appropriate, our news, when we are apart. We can support each other in times of need. I see the photos of cousins and friends at the other side of the world, and I can share their lives in a way that was impossible before. Used properly, facebook, Whats app,Skype,you tube, twitter etc are a power for good. It's not the medium that matters, it's the people who use it.

Yes, technology has helped us in many ways, made our job easier, everything easier but the easier it becomes the more we forget how much struggle we had to do before technology. But what really bothers me is the future of the kids today, they barely go out anymore, they stay indoors and would rather play games on the tab. What will be their childhood? All they can remember is those silly games, which you just tap and tap and I realize we'll be the last generation to go outdoors, get all sweaty, get your knees scraped, get sunburns and laugh like it's the best time of our life. And I don't want us to be the last, I want it to go on and on and on. Technology has many uses and it was made for us, but I guess we've crossed the line and are depended on it too much...

Developing a new code of ethics around technologies, creating social etiquette, setting positive cultural norms, and raising awareness around harmful habits while sharing the importance of mindfulness is urgent.

"These social networks will not "miss us" or "shed a tear" " - Agree- But we do not know who exactly our friend in need would turn out to be, this helps us to be connected. Indeed primarily we need to be focused on our important job - but for growth, it is important that we are connected. And in this age, where the world has shrunk to such a great extend, where we do not know, who is where next hour, what better way to be connected?

All said and done I really liked these statement of 'Rajesh Krishna' in Face book - Which I could read- Again Thanks to Technology.

"So, my friends on social media...

I dont want to know where you eat everyday, but do call me and tell me what food you love and what we can eat together....

I dont want to know where you went with your girlfriend, but definitely let me know over a call if she accepted your proposal and included you in her life....

I dont want to know how much you like someone or like something over the social media, but please let me know when you would like to get together to talk about the good times and the good deeds we would commit together....."

Sometimes doing all this in person is not feasible...and Technology would definitely help us do it...

Simplicity

Salman Khan's Bajrangi Bhaijaan and SS Rajamouli's Baahubali: The Beginning have a unique connection and that's KV Vijayendra Prasad, who penned the story of both the films. Baahubali has epic violence and Bajrangi Bhaijaan is a sweet story promoting non-violence.

Have not seen both, but I am in between the two...Various teams have gone for one movie or the other, and it is at the cost of my sleep. Does anyone realise that? Own office team - my second home to the former, and personal home team from office to the first, at this mid night hour. And how they make me do...By saying Chechi, chechi...

I am reminded of Chechi from Circus serial during my school days...Yes, the same one in doordarshan with Shahrukh Khan as Shekharan, a Malayalee / Keralite Circus person. There was a chechi in that. Today I am a chechi in my office of most of them....So is my office a circus?

No wonder, there are lot many similarities. We do have the ring master, the monkeys, the treasurer, the hard work, the pay checks, the tigers, the elephants, the owls and ha..the Joker...But mind you, I am not a joker.


There is one thing common in both the movies, as in me - simplicity. Now I am not boosting. A shere fact.

Don't dare to play with it. I love me, and don't want me hurt and broken like that of a joker....