Thursday, January 08, 2015

Single, But not lonely



Indeed as mentioned in Times Life! by Eric Klinenberg,the author of Going Solo: The Extraordinary Rise and Surprising Appeal of Living Alone -

Living alone, feeling alone, being lonely and being isolated are four distinct conditions, but we often combine them. Singletons(People who live alone), are generally neither lonely or isolated. They are actually more likely to spend time with friends and neighbours than married people, and volunteer in civic organisation too.

In the past 50 years, living alone has become one of the most rapidly increasing social trends. India, along with China and Brazil, has recorded the fastest growth of single-person households.

People who are successfully married do relatively well on conventional happiness measure. Do they enjoy life more? Not sure. But then there are all those who marry and then divorce or separate.(or compromise and stay together). People who live alone tend to be happier than them. Human history is full of people living, trapped, in marriages that are lonely and isolating. Living alone is a way of escaping it. As hard as it can be to go solo, there's nothing lonelier than living with the wrong person.

Living alone comports with many of our most sacred modern values: freedom, control of one's own time and space, the search for solitude, the capacity to socialise on our own terms. This is appealing to millions of people around the world.

The disadvantages are that it's expensive, sometimes impossibly so. It can be lonely and if you get depressed while living alone, the problem can spiral out of control. Also, aging alone can be brutal, particularly if you are frail and poor.

Whatever you choose, life sometimes get so bogged down in the details, you forget you are living it. There is always another appointment to be met, another bill to pay, another symptom presenting, another uneventful day to be notched onto the wooden wall. We have synchronized our watches, studied our calendars, existed in minutes, and completely forgotten to step back and see what we've accomplished.

It is our interdependence that makes our independence possible.

We would one day, be removed from the rotation, God is like The rising Sun, 'Too bright in her losing eyes'; Giving light and heat. Both a necessity. But Light to be more than heat.



One swing set, will make memories, to give you in future, an ache of sentimentality. All fragile and fleeting, but it introduces you to ups and downs of human life gently and safely, and teach you : No matter how hard you kick, no matter how high you get, you can't go all the way around. - As in the advertisement for the sale of the swing, in'The Fault in our Stars'. You have the freedom to make your choices, and when you do it; there is no regret, that you are living someone elses life.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I don't understand why you stated "The disadvantages are that it's expensive, sometimes impossibly so." Nice observations, rest all seems to be rational. ;-) I have 4 good friends who opted to stay back single and enjoy their life. Cheers ...

me ra said...

Well all financial burden is your own, there would be no support.