The 8th Habit

One of the major points in Stephen R. Covey’s global bestseller “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People” was that in today’s day and age, working together has become more valuable than competing with one another.

Back in the Industrial Age, when work was mostly physical, differences in individual people’s productivity were marginal, as no one man could cut 100x logs more per day than another. But now that we live in the Information Age, where knowledge is our main skill, a great programmer can indeed be 1000x more valuable than an average one.

Find your Voice:

Discover your voice – Unopened Birth- Gifts, your freedom to choose is the biggest gift you were born with. Build trust by being friendly, knowing when to say sorry and following through on your promises. Live by principles or natural laws rather than going along with today’s culture or quick fixes.
Express your voice – Through Vision for mental intelligences, Discipline for physical, Passion for emotional and Conscience for spiritual being the highest manifestations. Conscience profoundly alters vision, discipline and passion by introducing us to the world of relationships, taking us to interdependent state, transforming passion into compassion. Help experience internal integrity and peace of mind. People who do not live by their conscience will find their ego attempting to control relationships. Even though they might pretend or feign kindness and empathy from time to time, they will use subtle forms of manipulations and will even go so far as to engage in kind by dictatorial behavior. The private victory of integrity is the foundation for expressing voice.
Inspire Others to Find Their Voice – The Leadership Challenge
Focus - modelling and pathfinding : Modeling is the sprit and center of any leadership effort. It begins with Finding Your Voice-developing the four intelligences and expressing your voice in vision, discipline, passion and conscience. Choose to use the voice of Influence, trustworthiness. Blend voices and search for Third alternative (Synergy) and come to one voice – shared vision. Be a Trim-Tab leader who exercise initiative within his or her own circle of influence, however small it may be. Even though values control behavior, principles control the consequences of behavior. Moral authority requires the sacrifice of short-term selfish interests and the exercise of courage in subordinating social values to principles. And our conscience is the repository of those principles.
Execution – Aligning and Empowering : The voice and disciplie of execution is aligning goals and systems for results. Empower others by giving up control and handing them responsibility, this will help release passion and talent.


Natural laws (like gravity), and principles (like respect, honesty, kindness, integrity, service and fairness) controls the consequences of our choices. Moral authority is the principled use of our freedom and power to choose.

Do you want to set yourself up for a successful career in a post-Industrial Age world? Then let’s cultivate the 8th habit together!

Visionary leader thinks big, thinks new, thinks ahead – and most important, is in touch with the deep structure of human consciousness and creative potential.

Leadership is communicating to people their worth and potential so clearly that they come to see it in themselves.

Life is a mission and not a career, and the purpose of all our education and knowledge is so that we can better represent the divine and serve that mission of life in thy name and toward thy purpose.

Five cancerous behaviors are criticizing, complaining, comparing, competing and contending.

The 8th habit is the sweet spot of

Personal Greatness : Vision, Discipline, passion, Conscience (The 7 Habits)

Leadership Greatness: The 4 roles of leadership – Modelling (7H), Pathfinding, Aligning, Empowering

Organizational Greatness: Vision, Mission, Values – Clarity, Commitment, Translation, Synergy, Enabling, Accountability.

Consider further the comprehensive power of this whole person (body, mind, heart and spirit) model. It deals with the four intelligences/capacities – IQ, EQ, PQ and SQ. It represents the four basic motivations/needs of life – to live, to love, to learn, to leave a legacy. It represents the four attributes of personal leadership – vision, discipline, passion, governed by conscience. Finally, it represents these four attributes at large in the form of four roles – modeling, pathfinding, aligning and empowering.



4 Intelligences

4 Attributes

4 Roles



S P I R I T

(To Leave a Legacy)

Spiritual Intelligence

Conscience

Modeling

Focus

M I N D

(To Learn)

Mental Intelligence

Vision

Pathfinding

B O D Y

(To Live)

Physical Intelligence

Discipline

Aligning

Execution

H E A R T

(To Love)

Emotional Intelligence

Passion

Empowering



Finding your voice is a synergistic concept of the whole being greater than the sum of the parts, so when you respect, develop, integrate and balance the four parts of your nature, you’re lead to realize your full potential and lasting fulfillment.

As a person engages in the sequential 8th Habit process of finding one’s own voice, making the choice to expand her influence by inspiring others to find their voice, she increases her freedon and power of choice to solve her greatest challenges and serve human needs; she learns how leadership can eventually become a choice not a position , so that leadership, the enabling art, is widely distributed throughout organizations and society, and therefore, while we manage or control things, we lead (empower) people.

Regarding the people paradigm, we have learned that every human being is precious in his or her own right, endowed with enormous, almost infinite potential and capacity. We’ve learned that the pathway to enlarging that capacity is magnifying our present gifts and talents. Then, almost like a flower blooming in the spring, additional gifts and talents are given or opened up to us and our “hardwired” capacities in all four areas are unleashed to lead a balanced, integrated, powerful life. The opposite is also the case. If we neglect our gifts and talents, they like an unused muscle, will atrophy and waste away. The command-and-control Industrial Age software has driven he workplace to believe that the greatest source of wealth lies in capital and equipment, not in people. We have the hardwiered power to rewrite that software, this power inspires us to lead (empower) people, who have the power of choice, and manage things, which do not.

The developmental process paradigm answers the “how” and “when” questions and teach us to conquer ourselves first by subordinating what we want now for what we want later. The process is increasingly exciting because it is increasingly powerful in expanding our choices and capacities. If we follow principles (symbolized by a compass) that always point north, we gradually develop moral authority; people trust us, and if we truly respect them, see their worth and potential, and involve them, we can come to share a common vision. If, through our moral authority (primary greatness), we earn formal authority, or position (secondary greatness), we can together institutionalize these principles so that body and spirit are being constantly nourished, leading to unbelievable kinds of freedom and power to expand and deepen our service. In short, the kind of leadership that inspires followership comes only when we put service above self.

Organizations, both private and public, learn that they are only sustainable when they serve human needs. Again, service above self. This is the true DNA of success. It is not about, “What’s in it for me,” but about “ What can I contribute?’

Crucial Conversations - Patterson Grenny McMillan Switzler

Conversation are Crucial if the results could have a huge impact on the quality of your life. It is a discussion between two or more people where:
Stakes are high
Opinions vary and
Emotions run strong
We often back away from them because we fear we’ll make matters worse. Silence kills, Silence fails.

When we fail a crucial conversation, every aspect of our lives can be affected – from our careers, to our communities, to our relationships, to our personal health.



Mastering Crucial Conversations The Power of Dialogue – At the core of every successful conversation lies the free flow of relevant information. The pool of shared meaning is the birthplace of synergy. Achieve dialogue, rather than making a Fool’s choice. Dialogue skills are easy to learn.


Start with Heart, stay Focused on what you Really want. The best way to work on ‘us’ is to start with ‘me’; only person you can directly control is yourself. Don’t just go about winning, punishing or Keeping the peace. Refocus your brain. Take charge of your body. Refuse the fool’s or sucker’s choice, ask brain to solve the more complex problem by searching for the and. What do I want for myself, other person and the relationship. There is a way to share your concerns, listen sincerely to those of others and build the relationship – all at the same time.


Learn to Look, how to notice when safety is at Risk? Most of us have trouble dual-processing (simultaneously watching for content and conditions) Watch for three different conditions:


The moment a conversation turns crucial
Signs that people don’t feel safe (silence or violence) – learn to look for safety problems. The three most common forms of silence are masking, avoiding and withdrawing. Three most common forms of violence are Controlling, Labeling and Attacking.
Your own style under stress.
Make it safe to talk about almost anything – When others move to silence or violence, step out of the conversation and make it safe. Apologize when appropriate. When safety is restored, go back to the issue at hand and continue the dialogue. Talk about the problem with no pretending, sugarcoating or faking, notice which condition is at risk. Watch for signs if mutual purpose is at risk – care about their goal, trust motives. Do other believe you respect them? When you’ve clearly violated respect, apologize. When others misunderstand either your purpose or your intent, use contrasting. It is not apologizing, but provides context and proportion. Contrasting is a don’t/do statement that:
Addresses others’ concerns that you don’t respect them or that you have a malicious purpose (the don’t part) {This is important as it helps clear misunderstanding}
Confirms your respect or clarifies your real purpose (the do part)
Start with what you don’t intend or mean. Then explain what you do intend or mean. Create a Mutual Purpose. Contrasting can be useful both as prevention and as first aid for safety problems.



When people misunderstand and you start arguing over the misunderstanding, stop. Use Contrasting. Explain what you don’t mean until you’ve restored safety. Then return to the conversation. Safety first.



When you are at cross-purpose, use four skills (CRIB) to get back to Mutual Purpose:

Commit to seek Mutual Purpose
Recognize the purpose behind the strategy
Invent a Mutual Purpose
Brainstorm new strategies.


Master my stories - stay in Dialogue when you are Angry, scared or Hurt – You make yourself mad, scared, annoyed or insulted. Not others. You and only you create your emotions. You can either act on them or be acted on by them. You either find a way to master them or fall hostage to them. Feelings drive actions. When you feel hurt or worried, you go into silence or give cheap shots. Stories create feelings. Just after we observe what others do and just before we feel some emotion about it, we tell ourselves a story. We add meaning to the action we observed. We make a guess at the motive driving the behavior. Why were they doing that? We also add judgment – is that good or bad? And then, based on these thoughts or stores, our body responds with an emotion. So the path to action has the below steps:
See & Hear
Tell a story
Feel
Act
Stories provide our rationale for what’s going on. They’re our interpretation of the facts. They help explain what we see and hear. They’re theories we use to explain why, how, and what. If we take control of our stories, they won’t control us. Else the stores will control us. They first control how we feel then how we act and as a result the results we get from our crucial conversations. We can tell different stories and break the loop, to have improved results. If strong emotions are keeping you stuck in silence or violence, try this to retrace your path. Notice your behavior. Ask yourself what you’re really doing:

Am I in some form of silence or violence? – Get in touch with your feelings. Learn to accurately identify the emotions behind your story.
What emotions are encouraging me to act this way? - Analyze your stories. Question your conclusions and look for other possible explanations behind your story.
What story is creating these emotions? – Get back to the fact. Abandon your absolute certainty by distinguishing between hard facts and your invented story.
Watch for clever stories. Victim, Villain and Helpless stories sit at the top of the list. Refrain from clever and unhelpful stories. Tell the rest of the story. Ask:

Am I pretending not to notice my role in the problem?
Why would a reasonable, rational and decent person do this?
What do I really want?
What would I do right now if I really wanted these results?


State My path - speak Persuasively, not abrasively. When you have a tough message to share, or when you are so convinced of your own rightness that you may push too hard, remember to STATE your path; The first three states what to do, and the next two states how to do it.
Share your facts. Start with the least controversial, most persuasive elements from your Path of Action.
Tell your story. Explain what you’re beginning to conclude.
Ask for others path. Encourage others to share both their facts and their stories.
Talk Tentatively. State your story as a story. Don’t disguise it as a fact.
Encourage testing. Make it safe for others to express differing or even opposing views.


Explore others paths listen when others blow up or calm up. Start with an attitude of curiosity and patience. This helps restore safety. Then, use four powerful listening skills to retrace the other person’s path to action to its origins.
Ask. Start by simply expressing interest in the other persons views.
Mirror. Increase safety by respectfully acknowledging the emotions people appear to be feeling.
Paraphrase. As others begin to share part of their story, restate what you’ve heard to show not just that you understand, but also that it’s safe for them to share what they’re thinking.
Prime. If others continue to hold back, prime. Take your best guess at what they may be thinking and feeling.
As you being to share your views:

Agree. When you share views.
Build. If others leave something out, agree where you share views, then build.
Compare. When you do differ significantly, don’t suggest others are wrong. Compare your two views. Don’t turn differences into debates that lead to unhealthy relationships and bad results.


Move to action and result. Avoid the two traps of violated expectations and inaction. Decide how to decide.
Command. Decisions are made without involving others.
Consult. Input is gathered from the group and then a subset decides.
Vote. An agreed-upon percentage swings the decision.
Consensus. Everyone comes to an agreement and then supports the final decision.
Consider who cares, who knows, who must agree, and how many people is it worth involving.

Finish clearly. Determine who does what by when. Make the deliverables crystal clear. Set a follow-up time. Record the commitments and then follow up. Finally, hold people accountable to their promises. Document decisions and follow up.

Tools for preparing and learning. Two high-leverage ways of getting started is by becoming more conscious of these two key principles.
Learn to Look. Are you playing game or in dialogue?
Make it SAFE – Do/say something to make others comfortable

Slum

For the past few days, sums have been disturbing me. Was wondering about them, and happen to read the below,



These were something, I was looking for –



https://www.wilsoncenter.org/article/building-slum-free-mumbai The definition of a slum has two dimensions. From a legal perspective, slums are unauthorized and illegal structures, where inhabitants do not have legal title to the land that they occupy. In terms of living conditions, slums are areas that are short of basic amenities and characterized by the prevalence of insanitary, squalid, overcrowded conditions, and hence become a source of danger to their inhabitants’ health, safety, or convenience.


Over the years, slums have become “vote banks.”

Politicians periodically provide services to slum dwellers in exchange for votes. The exchange through electoral politics brings about incremental improvement of the living conditions of slums, but does not solve the long-term problem of housing shortage. On the contrary, the exchange stabilizes existing slums and even provides incentives for the creation of new slums.

Government Responses: The History
The Indian government’s responses to slums have gone through several changes. In the 1950s and 1960s, the initial government reaction was to clear slums and rehouse slum dwellers in subsidized rental housing. This approach did not succeed owing to the shortage of resources to build and maintain housing stocks and the lack of political will to do so. Meanwhile, it was realized that slum dwellers contribute significantly to the local economy, so the government began to have a more tolerant attitude toward slums.

In the 1970s and 1980s, the government adopted a different approach to improve and upgrade the living conditions in slums. Through various acts and programs, specifically aid from the World Bank, the government provided basic services such as water, toilets, electricity, pathways, street lights, conservancy, and primary health care and education to slum dwellers. At the same time, leasehold tenure of land was transferred to cooperative housing societies of slum dwellers. However, the scale of the programs remained limited and did not prevent slum proliferation.

Current Model of Slum Redevelopment
After the previous two phases of slum clearance and slum upgrading, in 1995 the government started a new scheme of slum redevelopment. Under the current scheme, private developers can purchase slum land from the government at a relatively low price — 25 percent of the fair market value of the land — and redevelop the land through the incentive floor space index. (Floor space index, a ratio of built-up area to appurtenant land, is a planning and development control tool used to control population density and building design from the point of view of health and safety.)

Specifically, after purchasing the slum land and obtaining the consent of 70 percent of the slum dwellers in the community, the developer will clear the land and rehouse the eligible slum dwellers free of cost in multistory-building tenements of 269 square feet (upgraded from 225 square feet) carpet area per household. Only slum dwellers who have documents to prove that they have been living in the slum prior to the cut-off date of January 1, 2000, are eligible for the free housing. The rehabilitation buildings are on a part of the land occupied by the slum (in situ).



https://borgenproject.org/10-facts-mumbai-slums/


Thanks to projects like these - “The Borgen Project is an incredible nonprofit organization that is addressing poverty and hunger and working towards ending them.”



So could not resist sharing.



“Currently, one in eight people across the world lives in slums. In 2014, an estimated 881 million urban residents lived in poor informal settlements in developing countries. These numbers are especially high in India where the 2011 census found that more than 17 percent of urban Indian households live in slums. Mumbai is one of the most populous cities in India, and while it is one of the wealthiest and most developed regions in India, it is also home to one of the world’s biggest slums. This article discusses the key facts about Mumbai slums.

Top Facts about Mumbai Slums



1. The United Nations Habitat program defines slums as informal settlements that lack one or more of the following five conditions: access to clean water, access to improved sanitation, sufficient living area that is not overcrowded, durable housing and secure tenure.

2. Mumbai, which is surrounded by water on three sides, has waged a constant battle since the colonial era to find space to expand. Adding to the pressure is the fact that growing employment opportunities in the city have led to a continuous influx of migrants from other areas of India. Shortage of affordable housing and a steady increase in real estate prices in the city has made formal housing unaffordable for most of these migrants.

3. An estimated 6.5 million people, around 55 percent of Mumbai’s total population, live in slums.

4. In Mumbai, slums are notified or recognized by the government if they were settled on state or city government-owned land prior to 2000. Nearly half of Mumbai’s slums are non-notified, meaning they have no security of land tenure and are not entitled to access city services like connections to the water supply and sanitation.

5. Most slum houses do not have individual toilets and taps. Residents have to pay to use community toilets which are rarely maintained and buy overpriced water from vendors. Some 78 percent of community toilets in Mumbai’s slums lack water supply and 58 percent have no electricity. Many slum houses do not have proper doors.

6. Dharavi, with an estimated population of one million people, is not only one of the biggest slum areas in Mumbai, but in the whole of Asia. While physical conditions in the area are dire, it has a thriving informal economy with an annual turnover of one billion dollars by some estimates.

7. Mumbai’s slums occupy 12 percent of its total geographic area and up to a quarter of the available construction area in the city.

8. Alarmed by the rising number of slums and in order to free up land, the state government has been attempting to rehabilitate the slums in Mumbai since the 1990s. The Slum Rehabilitation Authority allows private builders to construct new properties in former slum areas if they can get the consent of the current residents. The developer has to re-house the residents in the newly constructed buildings, free of cost. The rest of the available construction area can then be used to build upscale towers for commercial sale. These slum rehabilitation projects thus provide developers with an opportunity to access prime real estate, while renewing the area.

9. These slum rehabilitation projects are receiving significant resistance. The main concern is that they mainly focus on residential buildings that leave no space for informal businesses that are the livelihoods of many.

10. Apart from the millions of people living in Mumbai slums, the city also has a high number of homeless who cannot afford any form of permanent shelter. The official number of homeless people in the city is around 50,000. Some argue that the actual figure might be much higher.

While the living conditions in Mumbai slums are unimaginable and much more attention should be given to providing adequate services to people who live there, they also provide shelter and employment for millions of migrants who hope for better lives in the city.

– Helena Kamper”



Slumber and you will be in slum.

For the Love of a Son: One Afghan Woman's Quest for Her Stolen Child by Jean Sasson

For the Love of a Son: One Afghan Woman's Quest for Her Stolen Child

One of our neighbour boy, who used to come to us for tuition’s once asked, “when husband and wife separates, we call divorce, what do we call when mother and son want to separate?”

Any word for it? I could not think of any. So I told him, the bond is so divine that it cannot and should not be separated. 

What would a mother do, when her son is taken away from her? There is no solace for her grief. 

Here is one such story. Jean Sasson in ‘For the Love of a Son’ as the named indicates takes us through ‘One Afghan Woman's Quest for Her Stolen Child’. It offers such a brutal window into life in Afghanistan and Saudi Arabia. So full of suffering, it is incredible that this is a non-fiction.  Well truth is harsher than fictions. 

I cannot fully describe the devastating scenes that unfold in this true story – from the rape and abuse many women suffer at the hands of their own husbands, while the rest of their families turn a blind eye, to the injustice of gender discrimination in countries like Afghanistan and Saudi Arabia. The book’s dedication, by Khail, states: “These memories of Afghanistan are dedicated to three people who loved Afghanistan with all their hearts: To my beloved parents, and to Farid, my ‘big brother’, I miss you every day of my life.” Sasson adds, “For every woman in Afghanistan who silently suffers unimaginable abuse at the hands of the men who should love and respect her. I’m sure these women wonder if anyone in the world cares – I care.”

From the time she was a little girl, Maryam rebelled against the terrible second-class existence that was her destiny as an Afghan woman.

Maryam had witnessed the miserable fate of her grandmother and three aunts, and wished that she had been born a boy. As a feisty teenager in Kabul, she was outraged when the Russians invaded her country. After she made a public show of defiance, she had to flee the country for her life.

A new life of freedom seemed within her grasp, but her father arranged a traditional marriage to a fellow afghan, who turned out to be a brutal and violent man. Beaten, raped, and bused, Maryam found joy in the birth of a son Duran. Junaid Safdar. But then her cruel husband stole him away far beyond his mother's reach. For many long years she searched for her lost child, while civil war and Taliban oppression raged back home in Afghanistan.

Set against a landscape littered with tragic tales of horrific suffering, Jean Sasson, chronicles the story of one resolute but tormented woman Maryam Khail's who is determined to achieve freedom and equality with men. She takes us through her journey in Afghanistan, US and Saudi Arabia and how the life is different yet the same to some of them. 

The 7 habits of highly effective people

To achieve your highest aspiration and overcome your greatest challenges, identify and apply the principle or natural law that governs the results you seek. Principle solutions stand in stark contrast to common practice and thinking of our popular culture. Some common human challenges we face are:

Fear and insecurity – We live in interdependent reality, while we try to become more independent.
I want it now – What is important is sustainability and growth
Blame and victimize – Accept and take responsibility for the circumstances and take initiative to work around the challenges.
Hopelessness – Be the creative force of your life.
Lack of life balance – Have clear sense of highest priorities, work with focus and integrity towards them.
What’s in it for me? – Work selflessly with mutual respect for mutual benefit.
The hunger to be understood – Understanding and influence is what our culture demands, and deep listening is the key.
Conflict and differences – Creative cooperation
Personal Stagnation – Four-dimensional human nature – body, mind, heart and spirit.


A habit is the intersection of knowledge (What to, why to); skill (how to) and desire (want to). Tip of the iceberg is what people see first is our personality. The weight of real effectiveness lies in good character.

As you work from the inside out by building your personal trustworthiness, you create trust on an interpersonal level and improve relationships; you can empower individuals and groups within organization to produce desired results and organization can align its systems and structure better with the corporate mission and with strategy to meet stakeholder’s needs. Alignment then contributes to greater empowerment and higher trust.

A person with high character exhibits integrity, maturity and an Abundance Mentality. A person with high competence has knowledge and ability in a given area. To be truly effective in any area, a person must have a balance of high character and high competence, as people balance these two elements, they build their personal trustworthiness and their trust with others. Personal Leadership grows out of trustworthiness. Interpersonal leadership is built on trust. Trust, which builds strong relationships, flows from trustworthy people.

Basic Change Model:

Each of the 7 habits is based upon and incorporates one or more:

Principles upon which the habit is based – We are not in control, principles control. We control our actions, but the consequences that flow from these actions are controlled by principles. Principles are Natural laws or fundamental truths.
Universal, timeless
Produce predictable outcomes
External to ourselves
Operate with or without our understanding or acceptance
Self-evident and enabling when understood
Values are the worth or priority we place on people, things, ideas or principles.

Self-chosen beliefs and ideals.
Internal, subjective, based on how we see the world.
Influenced by upbringing, society and personal reflections.


Paradigms that are aligned with principles – The way an individual perceives, understands and interprets the surrounding world; a mental map is Paradigm. Individuals are products of learning and experience, and no two individuals share the same knowledge base or the same set of experiences so no identical paradigms.
If we want significant changes, first we must change our paradigms. Every significant breakthrough in science is first a break with tradition.

For small changes, work on behavior; for quantum-leap changes work on paradigms.

Self-Fulfilling Prophecy: The way we treat others influences their behavior and performance. The self-fulfilling prophecy-what we believe about ourselves and others – influences our self-perception, behavior and performance.

Processes or thoughts and behaviors that affect the results we achieve – related series or routines of mental or physical activities. Effective processes contribute to the ultimate behavior or habit we are trying to develop. It includes tools that help create and reinforce desired behaviors or habits.

The Change Cycle

Our paradigms (how we see things), influence the processes we use and the behavior we choose (what we do), this affects our results (what we get), which either meet or fail stakeholder’s needs. To continuously improve our effectiveness and exceed stakeholder’s needs, we constantly challenge our paradigms.

As we align ourselves with principles, we are more likely to succeed and make predictable and effective choices in a changing environment.

P/PC Balance: The Principle of Effectiveness

Effectiveness is a balance of two things:

Production: The desired results produced (The golden eggs, or P)
Production Capability: Maintaining, preserving and enhancing the resources, that produce the desired results (the goose or PC)
The most important resource available to any organization is the relationship among its stakeholders; of the three assets viz: physical, financial and human.

The Emotional Bank Account:

Is a metaphor for trust that exists in relationship. It suggests that every interaction with another human being may be classified as a deposit or withdrawal. Deposits build and repair trust in relationships. Withdrawals lessen trust in relationships.

Deposits:
Kindness and Courtesy
Keeping Promise
Honoring Expectations
Loyalty to the absent
Making Apologies, Forgiveness

Withdrawals:
Unkindness and Discourtesy
Breaking Promise
Violating Expectations
Disloyalty, Duplicity
Pride, Conceit, Arrogance, Holding Grudge


You can’t talk your way out of problems you behaved yourself into.


The Maturity Continuum:

Shows the relationships among 7 habits, public victory, private victory and stages of interdependent progression.

Private victory: When we learn self-mastery and self-discipline.

Be Proactive - You are the Programmer. Exercise human endowments (HE) through conscious choices in decision making.
Respond according to values – Use space between stimulus and response.
Accept Responsibility – 4 HE Self Awareness, Imagination, Conscience, Independent will
Focus on Circle of Influence – not on concerns. Can choose actions not consequences.
Become Transition Figure – Person who stops the transmission of negative behaviors to others.
Choose to positively influence others through actions and examples. Relationships are built by action before emotion.

Begin with the end in mind – Write the program. Envision results and values to guide activity.
Mental creation precedes physical creation
Choose a life center
Personal Mission Statement


Put First things first – The key is not to prioritize your schedule but to schedule your priorities.
The Time Matrix:

For living an effective life we need to be in quadrant 2 of the below Time Management Matrix.

All activities can be classified by importance and urgency.

An activity is important if you personally find it valuable and if it contributes to your mission, values and high-priority goals. Six steps, quadrant 2 process are:

Connect to Mission
Review Roles
Identify goals
Organize weekly – Schedule the Big Rocks
Exercise Integrity – One’s philosophy is expressed by choices made which is our responsibility.
Evaluate
An activity is urgent if you or others feel that it requires immediate attention. We can put them in a Time Management Matrix as below:


1 Urgent

Crises
Pressing Problems
Deadline-driven projects, meetings, preparations

2 Important

Preparation
Prevention
Planning
Values Clarification
Relationship building
Re-creation
Empowerment


3 Not Urgent

Interruptions – calls, emails, reports
Meetings
Proximate, pressing matters
Popular activities

4 Not Important

Trivia, busywork
Irrelevant mails, Calls
Time wasters
‘Escape’ activities
Excessive TV, internet



“Effective people have genuine Quadrant 1 crises and emergencies that require their immediate attention, but the number is comparatively small. They keep P and PC in balance by focusing on the important, but not urgent, activities of Quadrant 2.”

These three leads to independence. The Habit of Interpersonal Leadership are:

Think Win-win – Balance courage and consideration in seeking mutual benefit.


It comes from

Integrity – True to their feelings, values and commitments.
maturity – Express their ideas and feeling with courage and with consideration for the ideas and feelings of others.
Abundance Mentality – Believe that there is plenty for everyone.


Six Paradigms of Human Interaction
Win-Win
Win-Lose
Lose-Win
Lose-Lose
Win
Win-Win or No deal
Win-Win Rescripting
Develop Self-awareness
Write new scripts
Develop new scripts
Four Dimensions of Win-win
Character
Relationships
Agreements
Systems and Processes


Seek first to understand, then to be understood. – Use Empathic Listening Skills.
The Challenges of Communication – Diagnose Before you Prescribe.
We listen at one of the five levels – ignoring, pretend, selective, attentive or empathic
Tendency to respond autobiographically – advise, probe, interpret and evaluate messages based on our own experiences and motives
The one who listens does most work, not who speak – learn the attitude and skill of empathetic listening
The Attitude and Skill of Empathy – Built on a caring attitude and a sincere desire to understand.
While understanding another person takes consideration, getting another person to understand us takes courage.

Synergize. – Whole is greater than sum of parts.
Value Differences – Tolerate. Ground rules – Mental preparation, Interaction. Compromise.
Create Third Alternative
Communicate until you both find a solution you feel good about
Listen with the intent to understand, not reply
Express how you feel about and see the situation
Perspective of Humility – People see world as they are. Appreciate the rich resources available through interaction with the hearts and minds of other human being.


Sharpen the Saw – Develop & renew personal resources to create better personal P/PC Balance.
Four Dimensions of Renewal – Physical, Mental, Spiritual, Social/Emotional
Personal Production Capability – P are survival and PC are revival activity.
The upward spiral – of growth, change and continuous improvement. Progress is not a straight line but spiral with rhythms of progress and retrogression, of evolution and dissolution.
Principle – Centered Living – The only constant in life is change. People cannot live with change if they don’t have a changeless core inside them. Whatever is at the center of their lives will be the source of their security, guidance, wisdom and power.
Security – Sense of worth
Guidance – source of direction in life
Wisdom – Perspective in life
Power – capacity to act
Action Planning Guide:

Using a profile: provides you with a special opportunity to look at your effectiveness from several viewpoints. As you explore your own and others feedback, you will build your awareness and open your mind to your current level of effectiveness as you and others see it. You will be able to work towards your mission and become who you want to be by consciously building effective habits.
i. Objectives are intersection of:

a. How you see yourself

b. How others see you

c. Who you want to be



ii. Receive feedback proactively



Action Planning: As you review your profile feedback, identify and record your major strengths and improvements for each category.
Following Up: Once you have created an action plan, ultimately you are responsible for carrying out the plan. You may choose to enlist the help of others eg. A personal coach; support team including guides, challengers, providers, comrades, sponsors, opposites; those who submitted feedback.
Acknowledge and Thank those who gave you feedback and thank them for their support.
Initiate, share your action plan and track progress.
Strive for Continuous improvement.


Explore! Arrive where you began to know the place for the first time. Share learning with another person. Capture, Expand and Apply.

A poetic novel about grief - Maylis de Kerangal’s The Heart

https://www.gatesnotes.com/Books/The-Heart



By Bill Gates : May 22, 2017; He inspired me to read the book – So why do I write another review/Book Summary?



In his words:



I recommend a lot of nonfiction books on Gates Notes, and every once in a while I review a novel. But I don’t think I’ve ever written about a book of poetry before. That’s almost what Maylis de Kerangal’s The Heart is, though. It’s poetry disguised as a novel.

The story itself is simple: three French 20-year-olds go surfing in the middle of the night, and as they’re driving back from the beach just before sunrise they get in a car accident. Two of them survive but one of them, Simon, dies, and his parents have to decide whether to donate his heart or not. They decide to do it, and doctors transplant the heart, and the book is over. That’s it.

The car crash happens in the first 15 pages, so the rest of the book is a meditation on life, death, and, as the title suggests, the heart. There aren’t even that many characters: you meet Simon’s father and mother, the doctor on duty at the hospital when Simon gets there, the nurse assisting him, the head of the organ donation organization, the woman who gets the heart in the end, and a few other people.

But just describing the plot is like saying “during a heart transplant, doctors put one person’s heart into another person’s body” and leaving it at that. It’s not the plot that makes The Heart such a wonderful book. First of all, there’s the language. It makes me think of Vladimir Nabokov more than anybody else. The sentences are rich and full, and they go on and on, which is the exact opposite of how I write. There are sentences that last entire paragraphs.



At times I found myself reading more slowly than usual, simply because the way she describes things is so beautiful: at one point she describes a character’s words as “reddening rocks from a still-burning fire.” The word choices are very specific—I went to the dictionary a dozen times to look up words I didn’t know—but “rhizomic” turned out to be exactly what the passage needed.

The book connects you deeply with people who are only in the story for a few minutes. You get really detailed backstories about all the characters: Kerangal goes on for pages about the girlfriend of the surgeon who does the transplant, for example, even though you never meet that character. In the end, the effect is to remind you that all the people you meet in the novel— and all the people you meet every day, even if it’s just for a few seconds—have lives as full as yours.

And then there are the themes Kerangal is dealing with: grief most of all, and how it feels to have to change your life suddenly because somebody who was in it isn’t in it anymore. When I travel for the foundation, I meet parents whose children have died and children whose parents have died, and I get sad every time. This book forced me to feel the depth of that grief, and it was an experience I appreciated.

I told a friend the other day that she especially would like The Heart. Just like me, she mostly reads nonfiction, and this book is a good counterweight. When Melinda recommended the book to me, she said, “It’s different from most of the books you read.” And that’s true—but part of the reason for that is that it’s different from most books.

Ready to be a Thought Leader? - Denise Brosseau

We find thought leaders in all walks of our life. One of the world's most sought-after and my favourite, Dr. Stephen R. Covey, on the topics of leadership, organisational effectiveness and family, because he had the courage to find his own voice and make a distinctive contribution.

Thought Leaders are not just Subject Matter Experts, but change agents whose intentions and efforts are aligned to improve the world and who then choose to have a more significant impact by sharing their expertise, knowledge and lessons learned with others, aligning their efforts in a way that creates momentum for sustainable evolutionary and revolutionary change.

Common Characteristics and behaviors of thought leaders are:

Expand Ideas,
Nurture Relentless Curiosity,
Engage with Ecosystem,
Show the way forward,
Tell Stories,
Uncomplexify,
Engage with Metaphors,
Channel Universal Wisdom,
Help Others see the Impact,
Be willing to be Vulnerable,
Practise Journalistic Principles – these includes thoroughness, accuracy, fairness, independence and transparency,
Build lasting relationship,
Foster Trust,
Think relay not sprint,
Encourage ‘others to Other’ conversations,
Share Certain Behaviours – Help thought leaders increase momentum for their ideas,
Foster Approachability,
Be Discoverable
Share Openly
Avoid TMI (Too Much Information)
Be Persistent
Get Support
Don’t just think – Do




Steps to be a Thought Leader:



Find your Driving Passion – Develop your strategy:
Identify your Niche, the intersection points where your credentials, expertise and commitments are aligned; identify the ‘reason to believe’ i.e. why others should listen to you on this topic and is there an audience or market need?
Define your ‘What if’ future (WIF) – that your stand for, and is ready to make happen, Think Big.
Align with trends.


Build your ripples of Influence
Select your path forward, by sharing WIF to learn what resonates, be open to adapt new ideas.
Nurture divergent and consilient thinking. Consilience is the ability to link facts and fact based theory across disciplines to create a common groundwork of explanation.
Identify and enroll stakeholders
Have meetings with who matters
Face the naysayers
Clarify your message, overcome objections, don’t give up easily
Adapt, modify and redesign program, project or process to bring in multiple viewpoints and recommendations
Use zero-based thinking to regularly reassess that they are going in the right direction and let go of perfection. Relook, Rethink, Reassess.


Activate Your Advocates - This is needed to broaden impact from one ripple to entire pond.
Identify champions (ones who will put their reputation online) and allies (those who roll up their sleeves) – potential supporters
Think about ‘what’s in it for them’ and what holds people back, and align their messages accordingly. It could be altruism, shared point of view, skill-building, credibility and reputation, social capital, innovation, media attention, business considerations. Necessary trust can be built on a lot of different factors, especially visibility, credibility, likeability and comfort level, reputation and reliability, brand, baggage, confidence, sense of humor, loyalty, coachability, network and trust circle.
Prepare to SPAR - Set up their tracking and connection tools, prepare their message template, articulate your one-page action plan, and rehearse and hone their elevator speech and key messages.
Pursue a ‘Button to Billboard’ engagement strategy – incrementally bringing people on board
Create broader agreement with their ideas – crafting a white paper, hosting a training or encouraging a spin-off
Identify and empower champions from key constituent communities.


Put Your “I” on the line
Step into spotlight as the person who is ready to lead the way - “ If not me, then who”?

Willing to step forward, even if they are not yet expert enough
Understand it is their right and responsibility to lend their voice to the world’s conversation
Have the courage to stand up for community, even if there is a risk
As a follower there is a role: to pick up the torch and carry forward
Look at failure as a step-in learning
Appreciate the surprising rewards – influence, impact, connections – that comes with stepping into the spotlight of thought leadership
Use the ‘rules for resilience’ to reframe any doubts or fears and overcome failures and setbacks.
Use different kinds of help: forming a mastermind group, “ purse club”, or personal board of directors to support their efforts
Leave aside their “ Yeah, but….” And keep moving forward.


Codify your Lessons Learned
Understand how change happens
Overcome the ‘Not Me’ attitude – It often includes one or more of the following often false beliefs:
Not the leader, others already know it or own it, Too Busy, My strength lies elsewhere, Early days.

Capture what you know. Begin a wisdom journal or store mementos along the way.
Use Exercises like “JuxtaRows” to distill insights into a set of guiding principles or lessons learned they can share with the world. This is putting down on left the negatives and on right the positives.
Create intellectual property: represent ideas visually, add a creative and memorable name and a clear set of instructions for what needs to be done to repeat their success.
Devise verifiable metrics and collect proof points that document their progress to date and support their ideas.
Protect their intellectual property with a trademark, copyright, patent or other legal protection.
Decide what they would like to control and what they will not control.
Hire needed expertise, such as knowledge management experts or a ghostwriter, to move this phase along to completion.


Put yourself on S.H.O.U.T –
Select your audience and venue
Hone your message
Overcome resistance – Learn to practice strategic ubiquity, start with 20 minutes increments, overcome any fears of the online world, pledge yourself to be in service to others, earn to overcome objections and commit to spreading happiness. Happiness spreads.
Understand potential pitfalls – to avoid including straying from principles of transparency, going outside your pond, trying to please everyone, becoming too predictable, not matching your content to the level of your audience’s expertise.
Transform individuals into a community – Say We, Not I.
Start with the basics. Ensure others can find you. Be discoverable, connect with the community and share ideas widely by say writing in a well trafficked forum.

Incite ( R ) Evolution
Track your impact as a thought leader by measuring the reach, resonance and relevance online and off
Accelerate your influence by consulting, speaking, writing
Amplify your voice, create a follower community, empower followers, teach them. Your success is reflected in the success of your followers.
Take care of yourself. When you hit a speed bump, seek support. Rest and rejuvenate. Remember to connect. Turn over the baton to others and let them carry it for a while. Together you can stay the course and achieve the finish line.


We delight in the beauty of the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty.

Thought leadership is not about being known; it is about being known for making a difference. Keep learning and growing and regularly share what you know with others. That is the core of the thought leadership journey. Increase your impact, expand your influence and leave a legacy that matter. Remember to stay in service to your followers.

Inner Engineering - Shambhavi

This 31st March, visited Isha Yoga again. Was blissfull to be able to meditate at the Dhynalinga for almost an hour. Men had a dip at Suryakundu and women at Chandrakund.

To be able to do Shambhavi besides Adhiyog the bust sculpture of the first yogamaster is a great experience.

Shambhavi Mahamudra, a crash course of which say:

· All rules are my rules,

· This moment is inevitable

· I am responsible for everything

· I am not the body, I am not the mind

· I am a mother to the world.

You are advised not to do it, except under the guidance of a qualified trainer. There are just my precise notes for  quick references as and when I need them.

There are few steps in this, the first part is the preparatory exercises and the second part is the actual kriya itself.

There are three preparatory exercises:
1. Pathang asana (the butterfly)
2. Shishubala asana (rocking child)
2a. Right leg
2b. Left leg
3. Nadi vibhajan

Exercise 1 and 2 has to be done for 2mins and 3rd has to done 3times.
The main focus area of these exercises is to strengthen the base of spinal chord.

Now the second part starts which is a 5step process. To do this one should sit in Artha Sidhasana, which is sitting with left lower foot pressed firmly towards mooladhara. :
1. Reverse U-breathing. Start and end with exhalation from left nostril. While breathing from one nostril the other should be closed. 6mins
2. A-U-M chanting. This starts with ‘A’ from little below navel, ‘U’ from chest & lungs, ‘M’ from throat with closed mouth. One can feel the vibrations inside. 21times.
3. Rapid breathing or rabbit breathing with head slightly up and focus on junction between the eyebrows. 3mins.
4. Bandas which is neck, diaphragm and anal locking with fullest and with emptiness. Depends on how long one can hold his/her breath.
5. With head slightly up and focus between the eyebrows, normal breathing. 5mins.

In all the entire kriya is for 21mins. Basically there are three important steps in pranayama
1. Pooraka (Inhalation)
2. Rechaka (Exhalation)
3. Kumbhaka (Retention)

In kumbaka there are two types, again Antar kumbhaka (holding the breath after inhalation) and Bahya kumbhaka (holding the breath after exhalation).

That is what is used here with minimal effort and simple steps. One needs balance of body, stability to sit through for 21mins which is where the preparatory exercises help.

What better gift can you give some one than you time and my sis Thara did just that.

How to be a Bawse – Lilly Singh

Thanks to Kalam. Time to revisit books read and write review in 1,500 words. Among other books, reread this when Vinay who gifted me this was leaving exactly two years after.

A Bawse is one who excels in both personal and professional settings. Who excudes confidence, turns heads, gets hurt efficiently, communicates effectively and hustles relentlessly.

Success, Happiness and everything in life that feels great have no Escalators, only stairs, and we need to go up those. Start Stretching.



PART 1: MASTER YOUR MIND

Our mind is our biggest asset as well as our biggest obstacle. Most important tool we possess, but useless if we do not know how to apply it. Befriend it, control it, and become more self-aware. Be the best referee. Get your brains on Board.

Play Nintendo – Not being able to control people and situation doesn’t make your powerless, it just means you have to exercise your power in a different way. If your can’t control people, then control your reaction to them. If you can’t control a situation, then prepare for it. Don’t get fixated on getting people to behave in accordance with what we want that we forget to focus on ourselves. The best way to stop people from pushing your buttons is to start pushing your own.
Conquer your thoughts – It’s an ongoing process, requiring frequent readjustment as our mind is frequently evolving. Ask – Why, What, How? Analyze and discover the cheat codes:
People may be upset about something else in their life
Strongly believe your own opinion
Do things that make you happy or fear and negativity will slowly take over
Make yourself better in constructive way, rather than replying to all negative comments
Be Secretive – It’s up to you to decide what to reveal and when.
Get Uncomfortable – Seek out situations that mke your uncomfortable and then throw yourself into them. Think of discomfort as currency – It’s the price you pay to learn some pretty crucial things.
Have Fewer Emotions – Be driven by goals. Train your brain to focus less on feelings and more on productivity. Make every struggle count and remember that experience will always be a silver lining. Get hurt efficiently.
Don’t overthink – Humans have a tendency to overcomplicate simple things because we overthink them. But if you take a step back and remember your priorities, it becomes easier to make a decision.
Call yourself out – Making mistakes is cool, it brings your one step closer to success, provided you try to prevent them in future. Steps are:
Take ownership – Avoid Blame, Deflect, Denial, or don’t ignore.
Call yourself out
Find solutions
Communicate
Send the GPS Deep – Take a look at the molecules that make up your unique existence. Dig deep and discover your layers. Understanding yourself and why you are the way you are requires complete honesty.
Exercise Self-Control –
Set goals for yourself
Reward yourself
Challenge yourself
Don’t survive – If you’re doing it, do it the best your possibly can. Don’t just try to pass your classes; try to ace them. Don’t just aim to pay your bills, save enough to travel. That’s the difference between settling like a survivor and conquering like a bawse.
Be in Love – Take time and effort for the relationship with yourself. Don’t be hard on yourself, encourage yourself, Be patient with yourself.
Pause – When you have too many things happening. Pause. It’s your responsibility. Savor the moment. Meditate, Disconnect.
PART 2: HUSTLE HARDER

Once you and your mind are BFF’s , work together to focus on goals. Get work done, get rid of distractions, stay organized, create meaning success.

Commit to your Decision – To accomplish or be great at something. Two common obstacles are fear and distraction.
Let Go of FOMO – i.e. Fear of Missing out. Focusing on your work moves you closer to reaching your goals. Keep training your brain to pay attention to how rewarding it is to work hard.
Schedule Inspiration – It is the fuel for your Hustle.
Have Vision – The universe might respect the law of attraction, but it respects a good hustle even more. Long term visualization is when you imagine yourself in a scenario that you hope will become a reality one day. Short term visualization is helpful when you know you are going to be doing something specific and you want to imagine how the scenario will play out. 3 reasons why you should have a vision board are:
It gives you clarity about what your goals are
Helps you to be self-aware
iii. Constantly remind you of what you want in life.

It helps you make tough decisions.

Aim High – Life is one big negotiation. Start high. You are never going to get exactly what you want, so better ask for more. When you go for something you want, there are three possible outcomes: ideal, workable and horrible. Don’t give up before you even try.
The Alphabet is a lie – If you really want to do something, don’t have a plan B. Having a Plan B means you’re expecting your Plan A to fail and that is’nt the right attitude.
If you can do it, you don’t have to say it – Show people who you are, and then keep showing them. Talk is cheap, so leave it at the thrift store.
Know the game – Whatever you’re doing in life, stand owner. It’s important so you can excel at playing it and prevents you from being cheated. I want to stay in the league, so I keep up to date on the game. Let’s play.
Climb the ladder – It’s not usually an easy climb, you have to earn each rung.
Take the stairs – Shortcuts do not exist when it comes to success. Doing work eliminates the need for luck.
Set deadlines – Procrastination is a Hustler’s worst enemy. The clock is ticking.
Don’t be made. Don’t be broken – Your success shouldn’t walk on stilts. If one opportunity will make or break your success, then your idea of success isn’t solid enough to begin with.
You’re an architect – design your path to success. Get wild, be creative and don’t get distracted by the flow of traffic.
Be active – Make sure your body can keep up with the Hustle.
Stretch in the mornings
Don’t take the easy way
Don’t be hard on yourself
Drink water
Eliminate stress – Simple fix – Need Recognition and Problem – solving. Do not get frustrated.
Mold your failure – Don’t let disappointment blind you to potential. Roll up your sleeves, use your creativity as glue and mold your success. When One door closes; open the closed door.
Climb another Ladder – Feel empowered to earn success.
PART 3: MAKE HEADS TURN

Don’t blend into a crowd – stand out.

You are not a parking ticket. Don’t get easily validated. It should happen only when you accomplish goals or contribute to society.
You’re special – Do something with your unique characteristics.
You’re not special – Don’t keep entitlement complexes. Validation is temporary. The greatest and worst feedback are both dangerous in their own way.
Protect your vision – Your idea is your baby, parent it well. Let it grow up to be wonderful event, product or campaign.
Be the dumbest – It doesn’t make you a stupid person. It mean you are smart enough to select people to work with that you can learn from. Who is dumber, the person who pretends they know everything, or the person who doesn’t and ask questions?
You’re an investment – Invest in yourself using time, energy and money.
EFF Protocol – If rule is not accommodating the magic you could create, cross the yellow line, break the rules and get things done. It might result in something magnificent or chaos, but sometimes it is better to ask forgiveness than permission.
Be Santa – To Impress
Smile for a reason
Listen to understand
Don’t be Robotic
Live in the moment
Be confident
Dress comfortably
Power poses
Listen to your Jams
Speak in statements
Body language
Always have presents, and leave your presence.

Say what you mean – There is always a way to be open and honest while also being respectful. Anyone who behaves otherwise is just being lazy.
Not everyone hates you – But if things don’t work in your favour, or you see majority are against you, take the hint and work on improving yourself.
Understand priorities – Relationships fail, because of difference in priorities. Best relationships are those that not only allow you to have your own unique carrot but also allow you to help your partner reach their carrot.
Be unapologetically yourself – Everyone is weird, no matter how normal someone seems. There is a big difference between being yourself and being unapologetically yourself.
Shake what your mama gave ya – Make a phenomenal first impression.
Your EX wasn’t right for you – It is our attachment to an idealized relationship that is hard to let go of. If your loved one hurts you , it is the other parts that is right for you, not the one hurting.




PART 4: BE A UNICORN

Power of compassion, love and kindness should never be underestimated. Have strong values, express gratitude, positively impact others. Navigate sticky situation that tempt you to behave poorly.

You are a chameleon – You are a product of your environment. So, create an environment where you can thrive by:
Create passwords that are affirmation or important reminders like – Staydetermined.
If your struggle with certain thought or bad habit, put positive reminders against them.
Change your ringtone
Follow cute puppies or your motivations.
Choose colours that soothe.
Don’t talk crap – Spend time each day thinking about IDEAS to grow your mind and resist the urge to talk negatively about people. Stop allowing judgmental mean thoughts to occupy space in your brain. Pick a feature to admire about people you meet and store them in your mental contact list.
You’re not the biggest Bawse – There will always be a higher power that can throw you off the ladder at any time, whether it’s God, another high being, science, spirits, superpowers, evolution or miracles. That helps you appreciate what you have while you have it.
No Piggybacks – It’s important to know the difference between supporting people and giving them a free ride. Respect the art or hustling and make sure it doesn’t become extinct. Support those who work hard.
Have values, not hobbies – Create Personal Manifesto of your values, and Recite. Let your values be your powerhouse of the cells -Mitochondria.
Be Nice to people – Not being nice is like poisoning yourself with bad vibes.
There is a team behind you – Humanity is the biggest team
Positivity Is key
Opportunities are unlimited.
Promote what you love – Don’t bash what you hate. If I was going to let my passion get the best of me, then I had better use that passion to also promote what I love.
Appreciate thing – Rewire your brain.
Call out all the simple things. Even amidst issues, pay attention to things you can be grateful for.
Witness alternative way of living. Understand how blessed you are. Some people have it rough.
Pause for a moment and reflect on what reaching milestone means to you. It’s sad to work hard for something, only to become complacent once you’ve achieved your goal.
There is a lot of horrible things happening in the world and to deal with it you have two choices, - Be numb and continue living or help others with your privileges.

Be in Sync
Think of your mind, body and soul as members of a group project. You get the best grade when everyone does an equal amount of work. It helps align your thoughts, actions and emotions. Listen to your mind, work with your body, feel with your soul. Be in Sync. Be so N’sync that when you leave room, you say, Baby, Bye, Bye, Bye.

Badla

Birthday Celebration with Bhumi and Jisha.

BADLA ( official remake of 2016 Spanish Film Contratiempo meaning “THE INNOCENT GUEST” by Oriol Paulo); The name spells it all- A murder mystery propelled by revenge. It is interesting to see Mahabharata being quoted quite a few times in the movie as the solutions in life are mostly found in the deeper meaning of vedas and mythology.
Movie introduces Amitabh as a hot shot lawyer who is the last bet of Tapsee who has been framed in the murder of her lover, lover because it’s an extra marital affair. The movie plays with you for quite a lot of time building the story, characters, permutations and combinations that make it interesting. As you get to know and pin out people, the mystery oscillates and points in a different direction as a powerful movie should do. The only thing jo badla is the gender .

Performances are undoubtedly the reason people flock to theatres as you have powerhouses of talent from 2 generations -Big B, Tapsee and Amrita Singh are a delight to watch. Ghosh, who achieved success with a similar genre in Kahaani (2012), maintains control of the twists and turns. The Cinematography is fabulous. Some Dialogues are wonderful with a ting of humour which gives some relief from the tense.
It is like the Italian Pizza coming to India and getting its Masala which even some Italians love.
The movie ends with another famous quote from Mahabharata, said by Nirmal: "Its not always right to take revenge, but nor is it right to always forgive."