Bankerupt - Ravi Subramanian

When stories of migrants and Gun control; in India and US with their aftereffects on society run in parallel, how can we keep the book aside and get some sleep? This was 31 of 2020. Started on Saturday completed on Sunday...This has become a trend with books by Ravi Subramanian and am enjoying them. At the end of every book wonder is it real or fiction?

With guncrime becoming Comman in US, pro and anti gun lobbies are fighting a pitched battle. Cirisha Narayanan ambitiouses young woman with integrity is working feverishly shuttling with her career in MIT and research project in India. He father develops an interest to deal with Emu in Coimbatore, and to facilitate trade meets the investment banker Adi. In due course they become family. While Cirisha is busy building her career, Adi falls prey to hoax that plays out in the skyscrapers, markets and slums of Mumbai.

Cirisha stumbles upon a secret which change their life for ever. She gets involved in some sleuthing, on 'Staring down the barrel' by James Deahl and believe data for research was fabricated. How much of Richard did she know? Was it right of her trusting her mentor Michael Cardoza?

Some interesting discussions are Adi telling Shivinder what are auditors for? To write what we want them to. Lucifer telling James it's criminal to have a team which always dreams of personal glory, desperate for success. When aspirations are not in sync, it leads to trouble.

Gun incidents reignite the debate on gun rights vs. gun control. Nothing change. The game continue with different players.

Fix-m-Fast Lunch

Soya variety:

Fried Rice:

1) Biriyani rice wash and add salt  half n hour soak and then drain.

2) in an utensil, put ghee, elakka, gramboo n patta.. stir. Add rice and fry.

3) in another utensil, add water in double qty of rice and boil. After boiling, add this water in the rice.

4) add some lime juice n salt in this mixture.

5) after boiling, put the flame in sim till the rice is dry. Rice ready.

6) carrot beans & colored capsicum (optional) cut in same shape and fry in ghee. ( For non veg taste- you can fry soya chunks) (I sometime add a green chilly and little pepper powder when I feel like having it spicy,  Off the flame and add chopped spring onion and cellary to this fried veges. 

7) kismiss n cashew fry in ghee.

8) mix rice and all these fried items, layer by layer and mix thouroughly.

9) on top of the rice (for garnishing), add more nuts and savola thinly cut and fried.. 

10) coriander leaves can also be added on top.

Dal Rice

Add rice, dal, salt, curry leaves, potatoes, soya chunks, green chillies, turmeric, and to this water in the proportion of 1:3 and cook. For two whistles normal. But will depend on rice. Can add to this Jeera fried in ghee and cashews as well.

Soya Kebabs

Half cup channa dal – soak dal for 30 minutes,

One cup soya chunks – boil for 20 minutes – you will pressure cook later, but doing this will make it soft.

Drain water from soya.

While pressure cooking, put 2 spoon of ghee, dhal, bay leaves, red chilli, small onion, ginger , garlic, and for masala one big spoon jeera, eliche, pepper, haldhi powder, salt, and garam masala, and one cup of water – neither more or less – equal to quantity of soya chunks. 1 In high whistle, and 2 whistel in low flames.

Once pressure cooker becomes cool, mix all ingredients and fine grind in mixture, and chopped onions, dhanya pattha and green chilly. Mix all. Depending on water, to reduce moisture add bread crumbs, it will hold shape. In case there is no bread crumbs you can add rice powder, in case you want it dark colour add Kashmiri chilli or beetroot. To give shape add oil in hand.

Shallow fry each side for 3-4 minutes

For chutney, : Dhanya leaves, garlic, ginger, chilli, tomato, salt, and jeera – grind in mixture. That’s it. Can add pudina in case needed.

Soya chunks Biryani:

Missing Non-vegetarian? This would give a  little solace.

Soak soya in boiling water and rice in normal water, for around 30 minutes.  I took one cup. Chop and smash ginger, garlic and green chillies. Cut 3 onions. Drain water from Rice and soya. Squeeze Soya as water would have interned it's pores. Add salt, corriender powder and pepper, mix well and keep aside.

Add ghee to a kadai,  when hot add a little of masala i.e powdered clove, Jeera and pepper. If interested can include elaiche and other masala items if you have. Got it you have bay leaves. Fried rice in this. 

In the vessal making Biryani add ghee fry cashews, can keep aside few to garnish at last. Add ginger/garlic/ green chillies paste. Fry well. If you have, include little corriender leaf, pudina or Kasturi methi if required. Add chopped onions fry it till it turns light brown. Meanwhile add salt, turmeric, corriender powder, garam masala/biryani masala (optional), to this add soya chunks and cook for some time until all mix well. Parallels boil three glass water (based on the kind of rice used). 

When Soya is cooked and all mixed, add fried rice, mix all these together. Pour the boiled water, half lime and keep it closed for some time, checking occassionally. 

Once done and ready, garnish it with chopped onions fried in ghee and cashews. 

Other quick rice fixes are one pot meal of sambar rice, Avial rice and the famous lemon rice, curd rice, coconut rice and tamrind rice.

Mindfulness

Are we Mindful or mindfull ? 

Where is your awareness during this time? What happens?

Creating awareness of mindfulness means bringing in a lot of attention on what you do. What are some other thoughts coming up? Any  preoccupation, which takes our focus from one thing are hinderances to mindfulness.

Only thing we don’t get back is time – need to be careful on how we spend it.

Thoughts – words – actions – habits – character – destiny

 How much of iceberg do you see? 10%  - result, action, behavior, what we do not see – 90% - values, attitudes, thinking, feeling, belief, motives, judgements

Use nose to smell three different things, listen to 4 different voice, look for 5 new things around. Touch and identify 4 things around.

 Monkey mind is given instruction to concentrate. It’s being aware of our thoughts.. Be in the present.

 Two way to do: 

• Formal – concentrate on breathing.
• Informal – Mindful eating, walking, breathing, listening, breaks, appreciation, focus.

Life fullness competency -  live full living – how to apply it in current situation? – awareness, inner-self, mindful action, Intuition, positive mindset, Inherent happiness, Gratitude.

 Accept things as they are.

 

'The Man' by Irving Wallace

"In a Composite Nation like ours, made up of almost every variety of the human family, there should be, as before the Law, no rich, no poor, no high, no low, no black, no white, but one country, one citizenship, equal rights and a common destiny for all. A Government that cannot or does not protect the humblest citizen in his right to life, Liberty and the pursuit of happiness, should be reformed or overthrow, without delay." - Frederick Douglass. Irresistible, unstoppable...though small print, a medium sized book... The man by Irving Wallace is an interesting and captivating read, that speculatively explores the socio-political consequences in U.S. society when a black man becomes President of the United States. 30th of 2020, the novel's title derives from the sixties American slang,"The Man"; used to describe White people.

When acting president TC dies due to a fluke of destiny, the succession laws let Douglas Dillman, a black citizen, as The President. Douglas Dillman is sharp, intelligent, shy at asking any favours, very sensitive and over-cautious lest he be labelled as showing preferential treatment to his kind. Though a widower, he is reluctant to pursue a relationship with a biracial woman because he fears the lightness of her skin will raise the specter of miscegenation. To calm people’s worries, he agrees to play the role of a figurehead. He doesn’t even veto a clearly unconstitutional bill prohibiting him from removing any member of his predecessor’s Cabinet. But little by little he asserts himself, to the growing frustration and fury of his enemies. They finally pounce after he fires a backstabbing secretary of state. Dillman is impeached on spurious charges, but at the Senate trial he is dramatically acquitted by one vote. Several weeks later he is celebrating the New Year with his lady friend, whom he no longer feels nervous around. A new poll has been released: two-thirds of the public have drifted into the undecided column. This is good news, an advisor tells Dillman. He isn’t liked, but he isn’t disliked either. The Femme Fatale Sally Watson and her introduction by Leroy Poole, Ambitious Arthur Eaton, ‘keep the door open’ sequence between Doug and Edna, wavering of Edna Foster, fall and rise of Otto Beggs and the near assassination, high octane bursts from The Judge, bombastic speeches by Zeke Miller, interrogation of Wanda Gibson by Zeke Meller, loyalty of Nat Abraham and his wife Sue, Presidents transformation from being too depended and fitting into the shoes of late T.C. per request of his widowed wife – again a game plan, his gradually writing own speaches, meeting the CIA, his relationship with son Julian Dilman and daughter Mindy; and the deeds of Senator Watson father of Sally are all interesting plots, weaving the story.

Interesting lessons are, when it gets real bad, it’s enough to make it worth while. With great job comes great responsibility, do the best. Braveness is good, but we need to be smart and keep ourselves surrounded with smart people.

Thanks to Pattabhi Ram Sir for recommending this book, a worthy read, especially in the current political scenario. 

I think of a quotation from the final page of his novel The Prize, the last line of which appears on his grave marker:

“All man's honors are small beside the greatest prize to which he may and must aspire—the finding of his soul, his spirit, his divine strength and worth—the knowledge that he can and must live in freedom and dignity—the final realization that life is not a daily dying, not a pointless end, not ashes-to-ashes and dust-to-dust, b

Letters from a Father to his daughter

Remembering Our first Prime Minister, Late Jawaharlal Nehru or as we called him during our school days, Chacha Nehru on his 55th Death Anniversary. His Life Philosophy as he had written in The Discovery of India was "The future is dark, uncertain. But we can see part of the way leading to it and can tread it with firm steps, remembering that nothing that can happen is likely to overcome the spirit of man which has survived so many perils; remembering also that life, for all its ills, has joy and beauty, and that we can always wander, if we know how to, in the enchanted woods of nature. " There may be many who disliked him then and dislikes him now. But we know he did travel miles through the lovely, dark and deep woods...uplifting and shaping India of his dreams. ("The woods are lovely, dark and deep,. But I have promises to keep,. And miles to go before I sleep,. And miles to go before I sleep". - These lines from the Poem Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening BY ROBERT FROST, were his favourite and he had them at his desk always) Pranam to Architecture of Modern India.

Having just completed Re-reading Discovery of India, could not stop this - as I kept wondering, was that book derived from this? This was first compiled in 1929, based on letters written in the summer of 1928 when Indiraji was 10 years of age and in the Himalayas at Mussoorie.

It covers many things, like how little pebble and nature can teach you many things, on how early history was written, the making of the earth, the first living things, how animals appeared, the early men, races, civilization, formation of tribes, how religion began and division of labour, changes brought about by agriculture, the early civilisation, the great cities of the ancient world, different classes of people, kings, temples and priests, a look back. 

To work together is better than to work singly, and to work together for the common good is the best of all. 

Wellness & Mental Health

Mental health and best practices for self and at workplace – An information sharing session.

 Unique and effective workshop; by Devika Dharmaraj from Kelsa Solutions guiding us to be balanced , resilient, make better decisions at workplace, mindfulness and stay happy.

 Raise awareness, have honest conversation, and take action to improve and take care of Mental health.

 Agenda is to increase Mental health literacy. Anxiety and Depression are widely known issues, which needs to be discussed, and what can we do as leaders.

 Pandemic – Changed the way, we are working. There is a science, and today we know a little more. It’s our responsibility to understand.

 Need for the session is - Confidentiality of personal story, break to ask question. Experience sharing, openness, Icebreaking-warmup session, Rapport, willingness to listen, interest from others, Empathy,  No Judgement.

 Wellbeing drivers:

Pillars – Physical(sleep, activity, recovery, nutrition), Emotional (feelings), Mental(cognitive), Spiritual

 These drivers – gives a sense of purpose – giving us energy and passion – making us productive human being.

 Street words commonly used to refer to someone with a mental health issue are words like Abnormal, Mental, Something wrong, crazy, and many more. Mental health is a state of well being, Range of state of mind – will be anywhere in between good mental health and poor mental health.  Where we are in the range depends and influence our thoughts and behavior.

What constitute illness?

Does it impact your day to day behavior, persist over time period, Might need medication, therapy , support. In most cases people do recover completely.

What affects this state of mental health for you?

 All of us have stress buckets – some have large, and some have small, some are able to absorb, some are unable. If buckets overflow, problems develop. Larger the bucket you are more vulnerable. It is important to have a tap or hole in the bucket.  Which are positive coping mechanisms, which will help the stress out. It could be positive or negative. Negative coping mechanisms will cause more stress eg. Drinking will lead to domestic abuse. What is small for you, might be bigger for someone else. We all have different sized buckets. It’s not good to have large buckets, as it might lead to burnout. Eg. Fatigue, tired, anger. Little stresses help us get things done.

 Facts on how Covid 19 is impacting people.

11% of lost job, 38% people depressing, 40% people complain about stress; productivity is shown as dropping. 

Factors contributing, to psychological effects of covid 19 – uncertainty, disruption in social connection, WFH, different schedule, fear, financial anxiety, change in family system, decision fatigue, concerns about older parents and younger children.

Psychological effects : Increased fight or flight feeling, Reduced immune system, Disrupted sleep, Increased feelings of stress/anxiety/desperation/sadness

 It is really important that we as leaders are cognizant of this and send the message that it is okay to experience these feelings.

 Possible causes of distress:

Jobs are more than a paycheck, Work provides a sense of identity, Psychological benefits that comes from being productive

 EAP (Employee Assistance Programme); work based intervention – to assist employees. Online, F2F, By appointment, Walk-in, Counsellor, Psychologist, Therapist, Psychiatrist

Who will notice and act?

Managers/Team leaders; Friends; Colleagues/Team Mate; HR

MHFA – Mental Health first aid ; trained staff.

 Anxiety and Depression

What do you feel when you are anxious?

Physical(sweating, headache, missed heartbeat); emotional (worry, fear, anger, nervousness); Behavioral (avoiding, distress, OCD, drinking, smoking, sleep); Cognitive (Indecision, confusion, blame, blank) ,  - Reminded of the movie Patch Adams

 What happens with these?

• Immune system is repressed
• Heart beats faster, pumps more blood,
• Lungs – breathing becomes faster and shallow
• Skin – sweating
• Pancreas – Sugar rise
• Endocrine  - Pumps out adrenaline , releases less growth hormone,

You and the person feel that they are going to die,

Symptoms of Depression

Physical – loss of energy, fatigue, change in weight, aches/paings

Behavioral –Crying, sleep, drinks,

Emotional – Sadness, guilt, anger,

Cognitive – self-doubt, confusion, worry, loss of judgement and concentration

 Alcohol is a depressant.

 Some put masks, but when it drops the person will be very exhausted.

 Realise that the person needs professional help. We need to be aware of the signs and symptoms and what we can do.

 Coping during Covid 19

Experience emotional exhaustion but coping mechanisms have vanished. If you notice team member is not functioning to his/her full potential due to stress they need to be asked to consult a counselor, don't ask them to take leave or put them on PAP and if you experience any of the symptoms discussed; reach out to family and friend, take professional help – don’t prefer to deal with it yourself, or ignore it.

  --------------------------------------------------------------

Biotype and Mental resilience:

 Rumination, Negative bias, Threat response – fight or flight, anxious avoidance, Cognitive fog, Inattention, Emotional numbness, context insensitivity, (loose motivation, interest)

 Recharge strategy and Micro steps – (Brain is muscle and the current situation is like a marathon – so we have to practice to build up the muscles with baby steps, to build the capabilities)

 Healthy baby steps – social media control, breathing technique, right source of information, think about what your are grateful for – positive thoughts,

 WFH Practical guidelines: Nutrition/Fitness/ Mind/Connect. What you eat is important., set up an office space, have regular breaks, make sure you are getting  exercise, limit social media, have a routine day, have a regular lunch break and make sure it is away from your workspace, eat healthy, stay dehydrated, be mindful of being present at home

 Life after Lockdown: Pandemic will not go, there will be blended WFH options, Increased VUCA (Volatile/Uncertinity/Complexity/Ambiguity), Wellbeings, Communicate, listen, show compassion, Be present, Build relationships.

 To Do:

Instill trust, provide hope, give stability, show compassion.

Listen, communicate, be mindful and aware of symptoms, Trust and empower team, know what organization is doing.

Connect - Please be fully present.

 Helplines: Available.

 Counseling skills for managers

• Listen, Listen, Listen, Listen, Listen
• Identify the problem
• Trust and confidence
• Respect, concern and being valued
• Appropriate Information
• Confidentiality
• Encourage help-seeking behaviour

 Re-Anchor:

• What am I grateful for today?
• Who am I connecting with or checking in today?
• What expectations of ‘normal’ am I letting go of today?
• How am I getting outside today?
• What thing of beauty or joy am I either creating, cultivating, or inviting in today?

Mental/Emotional/Physical -) Drives -)Energy and passion -) Productive Human Being

Close your eyes – breath in through nose – 4 count, keep in  - 6 count and breath out with mouth – 8 count. (Do it for 6 to 8 times)

Focus and concentration exercise: Eyes closed, and sit relaxed completely – aware of breathing, chair its texture, cloth wearing, sounds around us, - Think about the last vacation you took.  With whom you went, and how did you go? Did you enjoy? Think about the last wedding you went to?

 5 management skills that will be put to the test. 

1. Leadership;
2. Challenge & Upheaval;
3. Engaging Employees;
4. Communication;
5. Delegating & Coaching Employees

 Managers/Individuals need to be the Chief Listening Officers. Future belongs to listeners. 

The Discovery Of India - Jawaharlal Nehru

Have read this book in Mid 90's fascinated and was introduced to it, from the DD serial Bharath ek Khoj. Took this up again as 28th of 2020 for couple of reasons - viz. felt like the book was calling me from the book shelf, no wonder could be because was thinking about Nehru and India with claims from Blind Bhakth's  of it being a dark era until 2014. Also thought worth documenting the key notes from this book. Another compelling force to do it was listening to Shashi Tharoor and Subramania Swami mention about this book, one saying this is one of his favorite top 5 books, and other  going at length to describe why it was not written by Nehru. 

The book in 10 chapters, starts and ends with the Ahmadnagar Fort, and is dedicated to colleagues and co prisoners in the Ahmadnagar. Nehru was in  Prison Camp from 9 August 1942 to 28 March 1945; this was written over five months, when Nehru was imprisoned there, and Published after release in 1946. In this book Nehru brings alive, an ancient culture, that has seen the flowering of the world's great traditions of philosophy, science and art, and almost all its major religions; analysis-es ancient texts like Vedas and Arthashastra, speaks about great personalities like Buddha and Gandhi with deep humanity and lucid style. 

When the world was going through the world war 2 and the famine; Nehru was imprisoned, and had a great urge for action. He pondered over the past in its relation to the present. Another reason for doing so, was he had lost his wife Kamala. On Life Philosophy, he mentions:

| The future is dark, uncertain. But we can see part of the way leading to it and can tread it with firm steps, remembering that nothing that can happen is likely to overcome the spirit of man which has survived so many perils; remembering also that life, for all its ills, has joy and beauty, and that we can always wander, if we know how to, in the enchanted woods of nature.  

Chorus from The Bacchae of Euripides, Gilbert Murray's translation:

    What else is wisdom? What of man's endeavour

            Or God's high grace, so lovely and so great?

            To stand from fear set free, to breathe and wait;

            To hold a hand uplifted over hate;

    And shall not Loveliness be loved for ever?

About The problem of Human relationship which is vital according to him; he says:

 It should be possible to have a union of pose and inner and outer progress, of the wisdom of the old with the science and the vigour of the new.  Indeed we appear to have arrived at a stage in the world's history when the only alternative to such a union is likely to be the destruction and undoing of both. 

On General elections, he was a convinced believer of adult franchise. In the quest, he felt, he lived two lives.  From chapter four begins the discovery of India, beginning with The Indus valley civilisation, Buddha upto Ashoka. Central idea of our culture was Dharma, which was part of Rita. 'Through the ages', takes us through the era of Guptas, and India's relationship with various nations in the world.  How Sanskrit, Greek and Latin have common words, and could be from common source; why we would have started the practise of idol worship from Greek, while Vedic period it was opposed. The six systems of philosophy followed were Nyaya, Vaishesika, Samkhya, Yoga, Mimamsa and Vedanta. Romain Rolland wrote:

"If there is one place on the face of the earth where all the dreams of living men have found a home from the very earliest days when man began the dream of existence, it is India".

Chapter Six deals with the new problems, beginning with the Arabs and Mongols upto the arrival of British.  Four legendary figures/great conquerors were Sikander (Alexander0, Sultan Mahmud, Chengiz Khan, and Timur. Arab culture flowered here long before they started their conquest; as we traded with them. There were different people who tried to conquer starting with Mogols, followed by Arabs, Afghans and Turks. Mahmud of Ghazni looted India couple of Times but reached only the north - Punjab. It was the lineage of Babar to Akbar who first captured Delhi and started the process of Indianization. Till them South Was always separate - with links to Jaya, Indonasia, Combodia - comming under Chola Dynasty and different rulers. Aurangzeb put the clock back and there was growth of Hindu Nationalism. There was decline all along the line - intellectual, philosophical, political, in technique and methods of warfare, in knowledge of and contacts with the outside world, and there was a growth of local sentiments and feudal, small-group feeling at the expense of the larger conception of India as a whole and a shrinking economy. In 1739 Nadir Shah of Persia swept down to Delhi, killing and plundering and carrying off enormous treasure including the famous peacock throne. A consequence of this raid was separation of Afghanistan from India. The real protagonists for power in India during the 18th century were Marathas, Haider Ali, British and French. 

Chapter's seven to nine covers the British rule, their ideology, revolts, challenges, frustrations and wars. When the book was written in 1944, the British had been in the city of Madras a little over 300 years, ruled Bengal/Bihar etc for 187 years, in south over 145 years, United Provinces - central and western India about 125 years ago, and spread to Punjab 95 years ago. The East India company had received permission from the Mughal Emperor to start a factory at Surat early in the 17th century, later they purchased land in the south and founded Madras, in 1662 the island of Bombay was presented to Charles II of England by way of dowry from Portugal, and he transferred it to the Company. In 1690 the city of Calcutta was founded. The battle of Plassey in 1757 brought vast area under their control.  

There are alternating tendencies for self-glorification and self-pity, both are undesirable and ignoble. It is not through sentimentality and emotional approaches that we can understand life, but by a frank and courageous facing of realities. We cannot lose ourselves in aimless and romantic quests unconnected with life's problems, for destiny marches on and does not wait for our leisure. Nor can we concern ourselves with externals only, forgetting the significance of the inner life of man. There has to be a balance, an attempt at harmony between them. 'The greatest good', wrote Spinoza in the seventeenth century;

is the knowledge of the union which the mind has with the whole of nature....The more the mind knows the better it understands its forces and the order of nature; the more it understands its forces or strength, the better it will be able to direct itself and lay down rules for itself; and the more it understands the order of nature the more easily it will be able to liberate itself from useless things, this is the whole method

'Oftentimes', says Lao Tzu:

Oftentimes, one strips oneself of passion

        In order to see the Secret of Life;

Oftentimes one regards life with passion,

        In order to see its manifold results. 

In our individual lives also we have to discover a balance between the body and the spirit, and between man as part of nature and man as part of society. Perfection is beyond us for it means the end, and we are always journeying, trying to approach something that is ever receding. And in each one of us are many different human beings with their inconsistencies and contradictions, each pulling in a different direction. There is the love of life and the disgust with life the acceptance of all that life involves and the rejection of much of it. It is difficult to harmonize these contrary tendencies, and sometimes one of them is dominant and sometimes another. 

In the Epilogue he writes:

"India is a geographical and economic entity, a cultural unity amidst diversity, a bundle of contradictions held together by strong but invisible threads. Overwhelmed again and again, her spirit was never conquered, and today when she appears to be the plaything of a proud conqueror, she remains unsubdued and unconquered. ..She is a myth and an idea, a dream and a vision, and yet very real and present and pervasive. ......The world of today has achieved much, but for all its declared love for humanity, it has based itself far more on hatred and violence than on the virtues that make man human. War may be unavoidable sometimes, but its progeny are terrible to contemplate. Not mere killing, for man must die, but the deliberate and persistent propagation of hatred and falsehood, which gradually become the normal habits of the people. It is dangerous and harmful to be guided in our life's course by hatred and aversions, for they are wasteful of energy and limit and twist the mind and prevent it from perceiving the truth. Unhappily there is hatred today in India and strong aversions, for the past pursues us and the present does not differ from it. It is not easy to forget repeated affronts to the dignity of a proud race. Yet fortunately, Indians do not nourish hatred for long, they recover easily a more benevolent mood. .......

For only they can sense life who stand often on the verge of it, only they whose lives are not governed by the fear of death. In spite of all the mistakes that we may have made, we have saved ourselves from triviality and an inner shame and cowardice. That, for our individual selves, has been some achievement. 

Man's dearest possession is life, and since it is given to him to live but once, he must so live as not to be seared with the shame of a cowardly and trivial past, so live as not to be tortured for years without purpose, so live that dying he can say: " All my life and my strength were given to the first cause of the world - the liberation of mankind" - Nicolai Ostrovsky. 

10th Apple Effect. - Diminishing Marginal Utility

If you are grateful for what you have in life, you will have more things to be grateful for.

In life as in Economics, the law of diminishing marginal utility apply. For a person who is hungry and starving for days, a gift of 10 apples would be a jackpot. The first would be bliss and rejuvenation. The second yummy, third juicy, fourth excellent, fifth nice, sixth good, seventh okay...by the time he would take the tenth, he might not even feel like having it. The 10th apple did not lack taste, it did not lack the potential to satisfy his hunger but the only thing lacking was his gratitude for finding food in the middle of the jungle.

So is life and everything here. We appreciate less, once it's on a downward curve. It is actually the law of diminishing gratitude, in simple words, taking things for granted. The hunter represents us. And the apple represents the gifts that life gives us. As we continue receiving the gifts of life, our hunger, our greed keeps on increasing and the joy we get from these gifts diminishes.

Never let the ‘10th apple effect’ make you take these gifts of life for granted. Never let your gratitude for life fade away. Happy life!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=32ectBThSFg 

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/10th-apple-effect-sreejith-krishnan-g/

Thanks to Sreejith Krishnan - you can watch this directly from him, at the above link. 

Migrant's Saga

Posted this picture in Facebook, and comments started pouring in left, right and centre. I know reading about the walking migrants, I got a bit sentimental - various stories, of a women delivering while walking, death of 16 people in Maharashtra, when a train went over them, as they were sleeping on the platform, people falling down dead, carrying children and heavy load without any food and water. But the discussion did make me ponder.

Indeed, we need to think on humanitarian grounds. For a mother whose one son is daily wage worker and another is a NRI, both of them would be definitely equally important. She would take all possible actions to ensure their betterment to the best of her capabilities.

When you lockdown a vast country like India in 4 hours, In the process taking away jobs and livelihoods in a jiffy, removing all forms of commutation, to leave lakhs of them homeless and hungry, they just have one choice - a long walk back without clamoring for any subsidies or stimulus packages. Lockdown was sudden, so may be impact could not be gauged. Actions were taken may be bit late. After all they are children of lesser God who were not part of the lockdown plans anyways . They hardly matter to the Vikas plans. So as plane loads of HowdyMody promoters arrive to fanciful welcome there is this part of India that walks hundred and thousands of kilometers if only to explore accessing Maslow’s hierarchy of human needs ! Even people who came by flight during initial days were stranded in the airport and had difficult time. Later after flights started, they had to pay, and be quarantined before starting their life in India. If they didn't have money for taxi they would have also walked. Moreover those working outside India miss so many things when they are overseas.

What hurts is that people are still trying to lay the blame on a certain group, as if what the country is going through today is just because of them! They are completely oblivious to sheer ineptitude of the governments, center or state. There are many stranded away from their families whose pain and struggle is not visible. But here something that's so visibly hurting all of us and nothing much done for them is really sad and over that people putting blame on each other instead of sitting together and finding a solution is even more sad! The question is why it is been arranged only after so much of anger? Why it took them so long to arrange basic transportation? If media persons can track them and show features, do you think the government is so technically backward to do so? People were panicked and fleeing. They were not given awareness or assurance. If each state government could work together with their local administrative blocks, these people could have got relief long ago! But no, we were busy blaming each other. Our administrative divisions are amazing and if they all work in an organized way things would not go out of hand so much. I'm pissed because I know what our government and administration is capable of but they are not doing it as they lack empathy.

The word 'migrant' is both racist and insulting, when they all belong to India. Should doctors, engineers, CAs and others who work in other states be dismissed as migrants. We should be careful before we make the kind of disrespectful remark that some have chosen to make. Being penurious is a crime, a sin, a torture even today and presume, so will it be. Only way out, is to come out of it. 

Schoolies

Between then and now, so much have changed. School was the foundation that sustain us, and has a big role in what we are today, our teachers were our nurturing mother, and schoolies our earliest friends with whom we carry lovely memories to reminisce. February 15th 1992 was our farewell day, and many of us have never met since then, some of them had become thick of friends, always together and few others, just in touch. We have moved and are scatted across the globe nurturing generation next, some have taken up their journey to the heavenly abode as well. Unfortunately we did not have a common directory of all class mates then. Thanks to technology, slowly we started catching up - first with Orkut, then with email groups, which moved to Face book page which brought us to a whatsapp group created with the intent to unite and bring together as many of our schoolies together. After 22 years few of the , class mates met on 4th May 2014 at Powai; and so began reunions. It was not just an yearly affair, it happened as and when possible, all across; few of us visited school together in August 2015 and had a get together with our teachers as well. 

First it was St. Judes School, from where a couple of them joined the new one. Patel Miss, Betty Miss, Jessy Miss, set our basic foundations. Amazing long walks with Raju and Rajani - either with their parents our ours, cannot be forgotten. As we travel down the memory lane, we remember the morning school assembly, the news, prayers and exercise, how we got into classes after that in line being checked by council members for the tie, badge and to see if the shoe is polished. Late commers were always made to stand out. Oh Man! We can go on and on. Charlie Chips, popcorn and Vada pav from canteen served by Girish Bhai and Raju Bhai. Being a girls schools; there were only handful of guys, we got to met in the school campus - The watchman, two office staff, two bhai's in the canteen, and for a very short period of time a PT Sir. Did all the girls together make Yadhav sir run away from school? How fortunate were we to have Gladys Miss as our English teacher, who was in the same school as the likes of Girish Karnad and Shashi Kapoor. An anglo Indian, she was the only teacher in high school who used to come to school wearing frocks, we did have Colin Miss in the primary schools, who still played guitar for school annual day events. A school for girls founded in 1974, owned and managed by the Maharashtra Holy Cross Sisters Society, a member of the religious congregation namely "The Sisters of Mercy of the Holy Cross" founded by Fr. Thedosius Florentini and Mother Maria Theresa Scherer in 1856 in Switzerland, our principal then was Sr. Mercy, Senior, we also had another Sr. Mercy Junior who used to teach us science. They inculcated in us Gandhian value of 'Simple living and high thinking'. We did have couple of other sisters as well teaching us like Sr. Neeta who was very strict and very particular about handwriting, Sister Jaya, but most of them were teachers, Few of them were a terror to all, some of them were liked by a few but others felt that they torchered them, while there were few teachers like Geetha Miss who was liked by all. She was always in the forefront, weather it be for Annual day, sports day, Guide, and was always one among the students. The various plays that she used to teach children for annual days were unique and outstanding. While Geetha Miss, Nigam Miss and Savita Miss helped us improve our Hindi, Lathike Miss, Louis Miss and Ghokhle Miss helped us with our Marathi. Kalyani Miss set our base with Mathematics, which was developed by Jessy Miss and polished by Prasanna Miss. We used to be in Aww of Alice Miss hair and often asked her how she maintained it, she taught us Chemistry, while Lathika Miss taught us Physics and Omana Miss taught us Biology, with the science class been taken by Beena miss. Our introduction to social science was given by Vikshalakshi miss, while Annie miss took us into the world of Geography, letting us live in igloos, tropical forests and greenlands. Sister Neetha and Sister Jaya, had a tough time making us remember dates and events from history and introducing us to the civics. There was another Jessy Miss who introduced us to economics, Bharathi miss helped us improve our drawing and craft work, while Aahere miss ensured that we participated in sports activities. We had PT period once a week, and Mass PT every Wednesday with different uniform. Motto of our school was 'Truth and Duty' ; with emphasis on love of God and service of man. So in high schools, girls had an option to choose between guide, social service and LTS. Margret Miss along with Geetha miss thought us different knots, songs and took us camping and hiking during our Guide sessions, praising Beden Powel. Margret Miss along with Chandoke Miss taught us English during the initial days. Rita Miss and Geeta Varghese Miss had set our basics. 

When they played an important role, in who we become or have become, it was schoolies, who helped create memories, each unique with varied talents. Over the years, some have developed it, and some have turned out into an all together different individual. It is so nostalgic, enriching and blissful to get in touch with each one of them, to learn and understand from them, and grow with them. With many people comming together, different groups could be formed, for charitable purpose, to meet/have fun, and to provide mutual help, which are all so rewarding. There are also differences of opinions, priorities, and needs. Hope and wish that we are able to find all our schoolies, and remain together - because Har dosth jaruri hai.

Marco Polo: From Venice to Xanadu by Laurence Bergreen

To elude corona, was virtually travelling into the most exotic of places and time; then it started raining in an extravagant tantrum...What the world encounters is stranger than a fable, indeed. 26th of 2020; this was with me, at least for the last six months next to my pillow - but someother book always overtook her or should I say him? One reason for delaying was - I wanted to give it time, and go deep into it; as it was a mix of my favorites - history, travel, and Biography. Having started re-reading today the 6th of May; do not know how long it would take to complete.

When Genoese jailed Marco after war with Venice, he not only survived there, but thrived. Rustichello collaborated with him to bring out the work on "Description of the World"; as experienced by Marco Polo, which came to known as 'Travels'. Marco knew well the use of adversity, and had been turning them to his advantage during the whole of his extraordinary life.

Divided into three parts - Book One (Europe); Book Two (Asia) and Book Three (India); each have further engrossing, fascinating, mesmerizing, illuminating stories.

VENICE - Seductive, Byzantine and water bound - most important centers of commerce and culture in 13th century Europe. (Byzantium and Constantinople, is the most populous city in Turkey, it was instrumental in the advancement of Christianity during Roman and Byzantine times, before the Ottomans conquered the city in 1453 CE and transformed it into an Islamic stronghold and the seat of the Ottoman Caliphate. Under the name Constantinople it was the Ottoman capital until 1923. The capital was then moved to Ankara and the city was renamed Istanbul) For Venetians, the world was modern and flat way back then, they were globalized. The Polos were not the first merchants to travel from Venice to Asia, but Thanks to Marco Polo's exploits, they became the most celebrated. The combination of the doge's (leader's) secular power and Mark's spiritual authority imparted a sense of political destiny to the Republic - a secular destiny, despite everything. The age of faith was also an age of peril, turmoil, and war. Splendor first has always lead to disarray/turmoil. The triump of Christianity was not a sure thing then; Rome was fighting against Islam, Mongols, Greek Orthodox church and even itself. At the time of his birth Marco Polo's (henceforth called as MP) father and uncle - Niccolo and Maffeo Polo had left towards east. Natural hardships had made the travel difficult, and thought they wanted to return, then kept going further; through the silk road, until they met Kublai Khan, who promised them the Golden passport.

Moghols captured and destroyed Afghanistan, Genghis Khan, established Tenggerrism - the worship of heaven as the official religion of Moghol Empire and appointed himself as it chief representative. Then, globalisation seeked to connect the whole world, including one God  - called Natigai. Genghis Khan's grandson Hulegree killed Caliph in 1258. His grand son Kubli Khan and his cousin Kaidu were never at peace. With Kublai's grand son, Thymur,  Yuan dynasty ended, and lesser Khan's embraced Islam. 

Different life style, places enroute Silk route among others and rituals during wedding, birth and death across places have also been described. Almost a year was delayed due to ill health of MP - which was healed by going up on the mountains of Afghanistan. What medicine was used, is not described, it could be opium. On meeting Kublai Khan, MP's father and uncle dedicated his service to Kublai khan. 
 

There have been conflicting views, as to whether MP, actually reached China, or was this written from his readings. 

Trade and religion has to be kept separate. Common essence of internal relations, is that it transcends political system and religious beliefs, all of which are self-limiting. Only absolute is power of belief itself. 

A Hobby and what it does to me - Dunja

A HOBBY AND WHAT IT DOES TO ME - BY Dunja - Sharing with her permission.

I am not sure if you have had this moments in your life when you are sucked into one of your hobbies from which you think it is your area, only yours - where you are the specialist, the all-known person until you meet someone who is far more of an expert than you are. Well when it comes to this point – I would not have a hobby because I am not an expert in anything. It is not even that I pretend to be an expert – I don’t like people who show off with their personal expertise on topics nobody really needs to know like for example who invented the ball-bearing of Jane Fonda’s roller skates while I have to say I don’t even know if Jane Fonda has ever been an owner of roller skates. Probably not, rather an owner of these pinky – kinky American Aerobic suits which were kind of fashionable in the 80’s. Not where I grew up. We wore cotton pants when playing handball against the enemy village and you were always afraid that - during a handball match where we were not allowed to drink any water because our overweight trainer had thought that only pussies would drink any liquid while playing the hardest game of your life – one of the opposing team members would pull down these cotton short pants out of anger because you had shot more goals than they did.
When I saw Jane Fonda the first time in one of these magazines you shared with your friends because mum would not allow to buy one (too costly) I was sure – the reason of wearing one of those kinky-pinky suits was because she had also been afraid (like me, so I had something in common with Jane) that someone would pull her costume down in public. I could not see any other reason than this. Why else would someone wear what make you look like an idiot? Top of the body almost nothing while feet where covered with leg warmers. I felt always sorry for her and all the women who copied her. Today I know, I had not understood the concept of physical attraction by that time. But I do know now. We all have our hidden secrets.

My hobby is sewing. Recently my husband, a mid-life-crised torned engineer, bought me one of these fancy Overlock sewing machines. When you sit in front of this machine it feels like being in one of these movies where the airplane is about to crash, the captain shot and a passenger is taking over the steer in the cockpit not knowing which button to press first to make the plane land safely

That is how I felt when I opened the box of his wonderful present. Engineers are different than other human beings, they want to improve the world, make it a better place for all of us. They invent a brush holder for a bathroom with an individual hole for each brush (I use the word hole, the correct word is according to my husband brush stem holder) and take it personally when your adolescent children ignore that invention and throw the brushes in the drawer below. So I had no excuse when my husband whispered that he had booked a training session for us. Yes, you read it right.

Coming back from rehab I was not able to remember the next day more than the two words US and TRAINING. That meant – he and I . I don’t know how many men in this world join an overlock sewing machine training class with their wife – I believe not many. Well my husband had thought it is a very normal thing to do.

To be honest – when I stepped into the store it felt like a daddy-and-me session in one of these places where fathers go on a Saturday afternoon with their toddlers to potter for mummy something creative like a dinosaur-shaped vase, colored in light green. Not that I would not have liked that but the presents I received for mother’s day where going more in a technical direction (we will touch that topic maybe later..).

Anyway the timing was a bit unfortunate because I had been really really tired and unfortunately (again!) – carried the wrong glasses with me in my self-sewed bag. (You have to send the right signals right from the beginning) . So my husband had to take over the steer in that training, exchanged technical knowledge with the young, pretty trainer while I was nodding my head hoping that the session would be over soon. To stick with the picture I had been able to close the training session but could not remember one single thing the next date even my husband had made notes but you know how that was in school or in university. Notes from other people are not useful if you don’t understand the content at all, they are like additional miracles where you think that is exactly what is written in the book (or in this case in the manual) so why has she/ he written the whole stuff again by hand - on a notepad. I must admit – I am a well-known-first-grade-ignorer of handbooks. Have you ever read a handbook of a toaster or a hair dryer? I bet you have not - at least when you are NOT an engineer. The world is divided into handbook readers and handbook ignorers, I belong to the last group but while a toaster is not so difficult to make it to function as a toaster an overlook-sewing machine can be a real challenge. I think you get the idea - . I had no choice but to read the handbook. I think it was the first handbook I have ever read in my short life and that from page 1 to page 54.

For people who belong to the first group (in case you have forgotten: that are the ones who actually read the manuals/ handbooks) it does not leave them with any particular feeling. But for people like me who ( I help you here again in case you have forgotten to which group you belong by now) never read handbooks – reading 54 pages and following on top also the instructions – it feels like being an expert, being in heaven – a sewing machine heaven of course. You got the point? I hope so. And this is not a lie. It worked, believe it or not – I am now able to use the machine and that made me very happy and it put me on a higher stage somehow, didn’t it? The feeling of belonging to the group of one of these experts was crawling from my feet to my heart. And now, after three pages I come to the point:

When using my Ovi (the community does not use the term Overlock sewing machine, the community says “Ovi”…. it obviously always needs abbreviations to belong to a certain community) I start to drift away …. I start to see myself standing on a stage with red curtains in the background, in front of a big but very quiet and highly concentrated audience and beside me a young, beautiful lady in a long shiny dress and professional make up, this young lady helds a microphone in her hands, starts to interview me and - there is that big, striking, colorful poster behind us which screams in the camera “Dunja , Designer of the year 2022”. In this special moment there is not much of a difference between the real Dunja who just started to understand her new Ovi and Dunja, the designer. I am only a breath away from reaching that stage and that makes me smile in front of my machine until my niece calls up asking me: When will you finally send what you promised a year ago?

And that is what I like about hobbies. They put you back on earth quite fast. But you have these tiny little moments just for you, for yourself where you think or feel: well - it COULD happen, couldn’t it. And don’t tell me you don’t have that. I have asked my sister: and she has these thoughts, too. That is evidence enough.

My sister presented me her first short-story which was about our cat Jimmy. In these days we called ourselves still being an owner of an animal (we both grew up on a farm, by that time divorce was a no-go and you still called yourself an owner of a pet without hurting any feelings) means that was by the time Jane Fonda’s kinky-pinky suit became fashionable. You see, life is a place where all winding paths meet. Jane Fonda almost met Jimmy in my home town - so to say.

Well, the cat was always stealing cold cuts from our kitchen table until my mother made this horrible, loud, fizzling sound with which she scared away our Jimmy. To make a long story short – my sister’s short story was about Jimmy’s cold cut trauma and we discussed over a glass of red wine that I will of course take over the accounting and managing part with her publishing house but that my only request would be that she needs to mention my name – and if only for one time - when she will give that interview to the NY Times while being appointed as THE new German author ( we could see the headline, literally feel the number of comments from readers …!) Even she belongs by now to the group of the political correctly named silver agers. She does not like that expressions as she dyes her hair.

She has – when she sits on that stage to mention the following – and she promised me to do so when we had that bottle of red wine - “my manager is my best friend and btw it is my youngest sister” – Only after that I let her go to find her place in the same row like Herta Müller, Hermann Hesse, Goethe or whoever has been on that NYT bestseller list (we will also touch that topic later, I am not an expert yet on literature)

So my sister has it, my friend Suzann has it, I have it. That is enough evidence for me .I don’t need to be a scientist to tell that each and any of us carries at least one of these dreams. Only difference is, some dream of brush stems, others of being a nobel prize winner. You take what you get J

Trials during Tribulation - Besin and Kanji

Patties:
Just mash boiled chole n aloo..then put sum masala..like garam masala..aamchur...coat wid rusk poder if poss..n I just roast it on tava wid spoon of oil..

Home made bread:
Same like cake..just different mould.. lesser sweet n wheat flour



Kanji Halwa:
2.5 cup kanjivellam
500 gram jagrey
Half cup rice powder
Fried cashew and coconut if desired
Ghee
Pinch of salt
Cardmom

Mix ricepowder with ricestarch, strain the mixture, 10 minutes keepstirring and heating,
When semiliquid add a pinch of salt, Cardmom
Jagrey syrup, when thick add cashew and ghee, when this do not stock vessel, pour it into a glass bowl, applying oil.

Khandavi

https://www.vegrecipesofindia.com/khandvi-recipe-how-to-make-khandvi/

Cooking this smooth batter of the gram flour and buttermilk batter is one tricky part. If you get this right, then more than half of your problem is solved.

To make khandvi, the proportion of gram flour/besan to buttermilk is 1 : 3. 

The recipe yields 25 to 30 khandvi rolls

Add ginger-green chili paste, turmeric powder, asafoetida and salt. If using fresh yogurt, then to add the sourness, add about 1/2 tsp of lemon juice. Add gram flour also known as Besin,Pour this batter in a saucepan or a broad frying pan. Switch on the stovetop and keep the flame to the lowest. Begin to stir.Spread oil on plates or boards or tray. Large steel lids or thalis work very well. You can also use the back of a large baking tray.  A suggestion would be to use your kitchen counter top, if you prefer. Then you just spread the whole cooked batter on it and can spread it in your own pace. A large wooden or metal tray would also be good.Stir & stir and exercise your hands. the batter also should not be allowed to stick at the bottom nor lump should be formed. So you have to stir continuously.it took me 17 minutes to get the correct consistency on a low flame. The timing will vary depending on the intensity of the flame, the thickness/thinness of the pan and the size of the pan. Just do the plate test and when you can form the rolls, then the khandvi batter is ready. If the batter becomes too thick, then it becomes difficult to spread and you don’t get thin layers in the rolls. In this case, still spread the batter. You will get thick slices, but still they taste good.Quickly pour about ½ to ⅔ cup of batter on a large plate and spread thinly & evenly with a spatula. You have to be quick with the remaining batter too. Since even a bit of cooling and the batter becomes likes blob, difficult to spread. If you use a large tray or a parat, then its much easier as you don’t hurry like a harried woman here and there.

Cut into equal sized strips.Gently roll each strip tightly. Then place them in a serving tray or plate next to each other or stack them neatly. If the tray or plate is large, then you will get large khandvi rolls. In this case after you finish rolling half,  just cut horizontally and make a second roll.

Can fill it will coconut/coriander leaves.

 

Tempering For Khandvi

 For the tempering, heat oil and crackle the mustard seeds.Then add curry leaves, green chilies and fry for a few secondsThen add curry leaves, green chilies and fry for a few seconds. You can garnish it with some more coconut and coriander leaves, if you prefer. Serve khandvi with coriander chutney or coriander mint chutney.

Mixed Dhokla/idli

First ..you have to layer a container with idli batter of one inch thick ness ..cook it for two mins ..then apply green chutney (corriender) ...n then a layer of khanan dokla layer ..steam it for 6-7 mins

For khaman dokla 

    Take one bowl of besan , add salt to taste , little oil , little haldi , one small.spoon of citric acid granules ..add water to make a batter ..keep it for 5 mins .. .when u r ready to pour that time add half spoon of baking soda .. mix it well ..u we'll get a fluffy texture .pour this on green chutney layer .

Instead of citric acid n baking soda u can use eno. .try it 👍🏻

Normal Dhokla

Sieve 1 cup Besan, make buttermilk( 1/4 cup yoghurt+ 3/4 cup water) mix both and leave overnight to ferment. When fermented - add 1 teaspoon oil, grated ginger, finely chopped chilly, salt and sugar . Mix well. Add 1 sachet Eno fruit salt. Mix lightly. Transfer to greased pan and steam for 15 min. When cool temper with mustard/ cumin/ sesame.... add some wTer to this tadka when cool- pour over dhokla- garnish with coriander

You can use khatta dahi, leave a small bowl of dahi outside overnight so that it turns sour. Use it in the batter and if possible use a hand blender to mix the batter, 

gives a very fluffy texture

---

Many of you keep complaining that we can't find vegetables during lockdown; then I thought let me share this Gujarati Vegetarian Recipe which Jains eat -Sev Padelu Shak - I have modified it slightly to suit tastebuds of other parts of the country. But this is what Jains eat during Paryushan festival where there are no vegetables; and this Sev Padelu Shak is made from Besan and Buttermilk.

Ingredients:

1/2 cup besan (chickpeas flour)

Salt

1 tsp Haldi (Turmeric powder)

1.1/2 tsp Red Chili Powder

2 cup buttermilk

2 tbs oil

2-3 garlic cloves (optional)

A pinch of Asafoetida (Hing powder)

Some coriander for garnishing (optional)

Water

Method:

In a bowl, Take 1/2 cup Besan (chickpeas flour)

Add some salt

Add 1 tsp Turmeric Powder and 1.1/2 tsp Red Chilli Powder

We will be making this in 2 cup buttermilk; so masalas are very few

Now add 1 tbs water and make a dough- should be thinner than Paratha dough but not too runny; it should be semi solid-semi liquid.

Make sure there are no lumps of besan flour left in the dough- it should be like a smooth paste

Keep buttermilk ready; it should be sour for better taste. If it's not sour then u can add few drops of lemon to make it slightly sour.

Heat up a deep pan; add 2 tbs oil

Now add some garlic chopped cloves 2-3 should be fine

Add a pinch of hing powder (Asafoetida)

let it cook and then add 1.1/2 tsp red chili powder

Kathiyawadi food is slightly spicy

Now add 2 cups of buttermilk (make sure it's not too thick - should be water consistency)

Keep stirring the pan so that buttermilk and water dont get separated

Add some salt

Wait for a boil and then slow down the flame

Take a strainer and apply some oil on the surface of the strainer

Keep stirring the pan

Now take the besan paste we made earlier and rub it on the strainer

cook till sev comes up; now stir gently

Again follow this process; sev coming ip means it's getting cooked.

Finish the process till all paste is over and you get a boil

That's it Sev Padelu Shak is ready.

You may add Coriander on top.

Enjoy with Rothi or Rice.

The Weekend - By Bernhard Schlink

Henner, Ilse, Ulrich with his second wife and their daughter, Karin with her husband, Andreas, Margarete, Marko, Ferdinand, Christine and Jorg - the 13 of them meet on Friday evening at the country home of Christine and Margarete at Brandenburg. Old friends and lovers, a journalist, a vicar, a lawyer, a businessman, a teacher/writer, and the terrorist now reunite but this is not ordinary. After twenty four years Jorg a convicted murderer and terrorist has been released from prison on a pardon. As the weekend unfolds, old jelousies simmer, and unanswered questions surge to the fore. In the hope that at least one of them can help him, guide him back to life, Christine Jorg's sister, who had been a mother to him, gathers hisold friends. As the friends meet, Ilse is writing, about another friend, who's husband committed suicide or was it to break from family life and become a terrorist? Jorg who then contempt Jan's act, now said Jan was the best?

Bernhard Schlink in 'The Weekend', probes the shadowlands between guilt and redemption, present and past, experience and youth. In haunting prose he distils both the pain of a nation and the abiding possibility of hope. People get locked in their perceptions and ideas. Sometimes the world needs a shock to come to its senses. Among other things we get a sneek peak into who is a terrorist and why terrorism, how they are treated and what becomes of them, their family and dreams.

Started as 27th of 2020 but finished before MP; the 26th is half way through. So Unstoppable, gripping and quick, it took less than 24 hours to finish reading; as much as the book, loved the smell of it. Was looking for 'The Reader' By Bernhard Schlink, but 'The weekend' was very entertaining; ended up getting this. Hope to get hold of The Reader soon, as Dunja keep saying 'The Reader' is an excellent book. ( Will post her writing's in the next blog)

Amma - Mother

As always, after work discussion, in our official calls; we do discuss the festivals, weekend plans etc. As a part of which, the question popped up asking, what was the plans for the mother's day? Every Second Sunday of May, is celebrated as mothers day, and this year it falls on the 10th of May. In US children go to visit parents, with flowers, cards and gifts. Roots of the origin of the day lies in the time a woman called Anna Jarvis had held a memorial for her mother when she passed away in 1905. She did that at St Andrew’s Methodist Church in Grafton, West Virginia, the same place where the International Day shrine is held. It was also her who had started a campaign to recognize Mother’s Day as a holiday in the United States.Even though her efforts were defeated and the request to observe the day as a holiday was denied, she persisted. In 1941, Woodrow Wilson signed a proclamation after which the second Sunday in the month of May was declared as a national holiday to honor mothers.The day is celebrated at different places on different dates. In UK, it is celebrated on the fourth Sunday of March commemorating the memory of Mother Church on Christian Mothering Sunday. In Greece, however, it is celebrated on February 2, linking the day with Eastern Orthodox celebration.

Team India's unanimous answer was, every day is mother's day for us. In India we do nothing special this day; and we honour and remember our mother's daily. The importance of mothers needs no retelling. Our lives are stitched with their presence, both visible and invisible. There is none of us without our mothers, and there is nothing wrong in either celebrating her everyday, or have a single day for her. The most unconditional love that one would see anywhere is that of a mother for her Children; if there is anything more, it could be in some cases to her grandchildren. But that is more of caring.


Remember having written about Amma some years back, and how all mothers are crazy, and pat came back fire; saying how dare I call mothers Crazy - it's because I do not understand them. Well so could be, so could be not. It most do take a mother to appreciate another. Mother is a verb as well as a noun, so is she. Some people had great mothers but lost them, some had or have mothers, who are very dear to them, and some have mothers who never mothered them or stopped mothering them for some reason. I was fed; I was washed; I was clothed; I was taught; I was cared; I was guided, I was scolded, I was nurtured, I was protected, I was done and taken care of by mother, in all the ways she could and more. We have had our ups and downs, and still do. But I know deep down, there is no one who would love me, care for me, irrespective of my flaws, as she does. And I do have her in me - though I have always claimed, that I am more like my father. So quick fixes, in cooking, or dressing. Her dreams had been my dreams. A very independent person, she is so very efficient, capable, and do so many things in parallel, it is difficult to comprehend. Not just me, she was and is a mother to so many who are in need; as she is a daughter to so many around. Very few could be like her; for most of them would love their family - but it takes some extra heart to consider every human from the service providers, and the unknown - not only our kith and kin as our own.

Universally - Covid is special this mother's day. A Very hard Mother's day: Seattle man loses mom, 2 sisters to coronavirus - It was a hurting article to read; so also there are many; who would be missing their mother's this mother's day - not necessarily because of Covid. This includes Rajesh, given his mother passed away in August 2019.The loss is irreplaceable, and something that cannot be described or quantified. For each their own. That is one living mother, who gives birth, or brings us up. But, in parallel we do have many more mothers that brought us up and keep us going, and if we be the same to those around us,

Let us cherish, and Thank our mother when they are around, and pray for them, wherever they are. Let us imbibe in us a living lesson on unconditional, unspoken, Universal Love!

From 'The Maria Goretti Corner'

My mother taught me ..
All that I am..
Everything I do ..
She was strict ..
She was kind..
She did not have riches ..
But was rich ,of a different kind ..
She taught me not to waste ..
She made me slow down ,when I was in a haste ...
She told me , not to be in a hurry, to date ..
I will find what .has to be mine ..
Somewhere ,in this life time ..
Just wait ..
She taught me to have faith ..
To have immense hope..
To never give up ..
To work hard..
To not hold grudges..
To always be kind..
To not talk about anyone , that’s not right ..
To mind my own business..
To stand up for what is right ..
I have seen her struggle...
I have seen her cry ..
I have seen her go to work in heat and pouring rain ..
And also mend my shoes ,make me pretty dresses, garden, climb trees and put clothes out to dry ..
She taught me how to knit, crochet, cross-stich and darn..
She always did her best ..
And always kept us from harm..
And prayed that we always , would be happy in life...
At the end of the day ..
Our Mothers just love us, even if we may turn out , not all right !
.
And when we turn Mothers ..
We understand them better ..
And then we try and make right , where we went wrong ...
But we all have our own paths ..
And that’s where , we will tread ..
Just remember , you are you , because your mama was brave enough to never give up on you ..
With all, that she did and said ..
.
I wish I knew how to be a mom ..
But I’m learning through my mistakes et all..
Sometimes when I look at myself , through my kids eyes..
I see a dragon, all claws and fire , snarling outside ..
But inside all I want ,is that my kids turn out fine ...
That they are kind, brave ,strong and stand on the side of goodness , most of the time..
That they are happy ,from their insides and have enough to laugh about ..
And want to hug me , as long as I’m around...
And when my circle comes to an end ..
They remember me with laughs ..
And say , “God ! What a dragon she was , but loved us , as crazily as a bear who would brave stinging bees for honey !
Crazy kook Mommy ..