A Reading List - Sara Nisha Adams

 

An unforgettable and heartwarming debut about how a chance encounter with a list of library books helps forge an unlikely friendship between two very different people in a London suburb.

Widower Mukesh lives a quiet life in the London Borough of Ealing after losing his beloved wife. He shops every Wednesday, goes to Temple, and worries about his granddaughter, Priya, who hides in her room reading while he spends his evenings watching nature documentaries.

Aleisha is a bright but anxious teenager working at the local library for the summer when she discovers a crumpled-up piece of paper in the back of To Kill a Mockingbird. It’s a list of novels that she’s never heard of before. Intrigued, and a little bored with her slow job at the checkout desk, she impulsively decides to read every book on the list, one after the other. As each story gives up its magic, the books transport Aleisha from the painful realities she’s facing at home.

When Mukesh arrives at the library, desperate to forge a connection with his bookworm granddaughter, Aleisha passes along the reading list… hoping that it will be a lifeline for him too. Slowly, the shared books create a connection between two lonely souls, as fiction helps them escape their grief and everyday troubles and find joy again. 

At Priya's request, Naina gave back To Wembley, To the people who loved her, the reading list. 

These are all stories of someone forced out of the comfort zone. 

In addition to these books, there are many other books too mentioned here. Most prominent being The Time Travellers Wife by Audrey Niffenegger. 

A book on books that has a lasting impact.

Set in Wembley in London with all its variety, colour, cultures, contrasts and contradictions, the still grieving Mukesh lost his beloved wife, Naina, 2 years ago. He has withdrawn into himself, a lonely man ruled by routines, with his protective daughters playing an organising and protective role through the phone although failing to communicate with him, busy with their own lives. Mukesh is not a reader, but Naina was, and when he finds a library copy of The Time Traveler's Wife taken out from the Harrow Road Library, he reads it and finds it a revelation, discovering Naina within it, the story speaks to him about his love for Naina and the heartrending experience of losing her to cancer.

This has Mukesh making his way to the library, where he has a problematic encounter with 17 year old Aleisha, not a reader either, working temporarily at the library on the recommendation of her book loving brother, Aiden. The two of them are bearing the heavy responsibility of caring for their mother, Leilah, round the clock, with no support for her mental health issues. Along with other people in the book, Aleisha discovers a crumpled reading list that begins with Just in case you need it. The list comprises of To Kill a Mockingbird, Rebecca, Life of Pi, The Kite Runner, Pride and Prejudice, Little Women, A Suitable Boy and Beloved, a selection that serendipitously I have read. Aleisha reads the books prior to recommending them to Mukesh, leading to the two of developing a close relationship that begins with their discussions over the books, and the surprising impact they make on their lives, with ghosts of the characters appearing in Mukesh's life.

Mukesh becomes far more outgoing, letting in others into his life, getting close to his young granddaughter, Priya, as reading becomes an integral part of his life, feeling closer to Naina as a result. This is a beautiful and enthralling read, totally riveting, paying homage to books, libraries, readers and communities, a life affirming novel amidst the grief, death, loneliness and challenging circumstances that the characters find themselves in. I would like to suggest that anyone who has plans to read any of the books on the reading list that they do so before reading this, as there are major spoilers in it. I highly recommend this incredible debut to any and every reader.  

--

The act to 'Save our Libraries' is indeed a great initiative and stress buster. 

That line about steeping into someone elses skin. Dean telling her daughter Aleisha that things die all the time, It's not a big deal. Aiden, and his special plate with Peter Rabbit's ever smiling face and shards of it was something never expected. 

Books they have the power to heal, and at times, we do wonder, does it take us away from the real life?

Books find us at the right time, give us comfort when needed, give us escape, an opportunity to live beyond our life, opportunity to love more powerfully, a chance to open up and let people in. 

And like most of the book lovers thoughts, the book just before Acknowledgements ends with:

"These books found me at just the right time in my life. I can remember each of them so vividly, I remember the characters as though they were friends, sometimes even family. I can remember exactly where I was and how I felt when I turned that final page. They've stayed with me ever since. 

CAKE (Compassion, Acceptance, Kindness and Empathy).

 Applying Compassion, Acceptance, Kindness and Empathy techniques can foster healthier and more fulfilling interpersonal connections.

Would You agree if I say, having CAKE daily is good for health?

Compassion

Compassion is a social feeling that motivates people to go out of their way to relieve the physical, mental, or emotional pains of others and themselves.

How to Practice Compassion

Speak with kindness.

Apologize when you've made a mistake.

Listen carefully and without judgment.

Encourage other people.

Offer to help someone with a task.

Be happy for someone else's success.

Accept people for who they are.

Forgive people for making mistakes.

Compassionate Inner Voice

“I’m human, and I’m growing”

“I’ve faced challenges before and have come out stronger. I can handle this too.”

“I forgive myself; mistakes are opportunities for growth.”

“It’s okay to feel overwhelmed, I’m allowed to have difficult moments.”

Acceptance:

Acceptance in human psychology is a person's assent to the reality of a situation, recognizing a process or condition that is a fait accompli without attempting to change it or protest it. The concept is close in meaning to acquiescence, derived from the Latin acquiēscere.

Characteristics of an Accepting Person

1.       CONFIDENT. An accepting person must be confident in one's own self, beliefs and values to accept that other people may feel differently or believe something else and they have every right to feel that way.

2.       FLEXIBLE. ...

3.       FORGIVING. ...

4.       OPEN-MINDED. ...

5.       PATIENT. ...

6.       RESPECTFUL. ...

7.       SENSITIVE. ...

8.       THOUGHTFUL.

Kindness:

Kindness is a type of behavior marked by acts of generosity, consideration, rendering assistance, or concern for others, without expecting praise or reward in return. 

Kindness: Surprise others with a gesture that brings a smile to their face and shows consideration for their feelings.

Remember being Kind to yourself is very important.

 

Empathy

Empathy is the capacity to understand or feel what another person is experiencing from within their frame of reference, that is, the capacity to place oneself in another's position. 

Sympathy is feeling bad for someone who is lesser than I am; Empathy is actively understand where others are coming form and being tuned to their needs

 

Reach out with a text, email or note to let someone know you’re thinking of them and are there for them.

·       Nurture self-encouragement

·       Accept yourself, as you are

·       Honor your accomplishments

·       Acknowledge your emotion without judgement

 

Write down:

 

Today, I commit to….

I want to do this because….

I will accomplish this by……

 

Think of one person you can invite :

 

C – ………….Invite to join for an evening walk in the park

A – ----------Schedule check in calls to help them embrace current difficulties.

K – ------------------ Give verbal assurance to reach out for any conversation or assistance

E - ------------------ Validate their emotions and provide non- judgmental space to express.

Compassion’s spark ignites a chain,

Acceptance bridges, breaking pain,

Kindness glows, its light displayed,

Empathy’s embrace, bonds remade.

In this dance of heart and souls,

A symphony of connections unfolds.

Compassion, acceptance, kindness, empathy.

Together, they shape our shared legacy.

There is a  ‘Ripple Effect’ to all that we do. Whatever we do, comes back to us. 

A journey Into Myself...

 Each of us have a different answer to the question "Who am I" Some tags and labels become a significant part of us, such as the roles we play in relationships, our profession, our hobbies etc. The categories these belongs to include

• Personal identity
• Associative identity
• Egoic identity
• Familial identity

Egoic simply means “pertaining to ego” or “pertaining to I.” Egoic thoughts, motives, emotions, and behaviors are reactions in which I, me, and mine take center stage. An egoic reaction is one in which I am centrally involved

familial

/fəˈmɪlɪəl/

adjective

relating to or occurring in a family or its members.

"familial relationships"

Influences in forming our story

• Schooling
• Parents, teachers, elders
• Religion and faith
• Media
• Culture

Identification and Internalisation

Identification is the process of perceiving something as an inseparable part of yourself. Identification are highly personal, can change over time and can be positive or negative. 

Internalisation is the shift from 'I have' to 'I am'

I have 10 years of experience, I can speak well in front of big crowds. I have analytical thinking skills. 

I am experienced/I am an expert. I am an orator. I am intelligent. 

These two processes lead us to focus on only one aspect of our identity - that which may be core to our memories and experiences, that which may have been validated by others and so on. 

Being Mindful: Building an inside-out focus

The construction of a healthy and dynamic sense of self involves recognizing all the 4 aspects of identity, namely, familial, personal, egoic and associative. Keeping this in mind answer, answers to the questions will lead you to build your story from the inside out. 

How do I describe Myself? * If I don't go by existing norms.

• Who defines/controls/influences My definitions?
• What does success mean to me?
• How do I Evaluate myself?
• Who/What do I like?
• What is Fulfilling to me?

"Your Vision Will become clear only when you can look into your heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes." ~ Carl Jung. 

The Professionals' Guide to ChatGPT ~ CA. V PATTABHI RAM & CA. Dungar Chand U Jain

 Live Links This evening's book launch. The Professionals' Guide to ChatGPT

At 6.00 pm on Monday, 9 October 2023 *Dr Palanivel Thiaga Rajan* Hon’ble Minister for Information Technology Govt of Tamilnadu is the Chief Guest.

Live Links https://www.mmachennai.org/pages/livestream www.facebook.com/mmachennai www.youtube.com/madrasmanagementassociationchennai twitter.com/mma_4u

Welcome address by Mahalingam Sir. It was a big loss not having this during his growing up years.

Sheer capacity to collate, compute and do things, in a cost effective way, a personal assistant that is starting to change life.

Dr. Palanivel Thiagarajan Minister of Information Technology and Digital Services, Government of Tamil Nadu, in the welcome address and in his forward says: "The journey of AI has been spectacular – from its humble start in science fiction to its seamless present-day applications. I believe that in a few years, it will become as mainstream as Google, the search engine. Yet, ChatGPT and related AI tools remain a mystery for many of us. This is where this book comes in handy."

Two questions you can take!!

1. What does ChatGPT bring to the table that is revolutionary and unique, and how does it stand out from traditional machine interactions? 2. How does the text explain ChatGPT’s versatility and ability to assist in various fields and industries? Provide specific examples of scenarios where ChatGPT could be beneficial. Two immediate applicaitons - law and medicine.

Pattabhiram Sir on the book:

Living in most amazing time of history. We are seeing the magic of AI in front of our eyes, from being a science fiction, in a manner we can completely understand.

The book

The contributors. 

Panel discussion

Before marriage historical, after marriage : fair valuation.

90% people use Chat GPT as google, it is not google.

Personal Productivity Enhancement Tool.

Invest on technology, learn technology, but be strong on fundamentals.

Whether we like it or not, it is time to embrace ChatGPT.

Father of action is decision and mother is information. Like freedom without discipline is  country without defence, Information without regulation is humans without protection. 

Secrets of the Millionaire Mind: Mastering the Inner Game of Wealth Hardcover - T. Harv Eker

Have you ever wondered why some people seem to get rich easily, while others are destined for a life of financial struggle? Is the difference found in their education, intelligence, skills, timing, work habits, contacts, luck, or their choice of jobs, businesses, or investments?

The shocking answer is: None of the above!

Secrets of the Millionaire Mind explains how people unconsciously develop rigid attitudes and behavioral patterns in their relationship to money that they learned from their parents – and that will determine their future wealth. It presents the key guiding principles and thought patterns that millionaires live by and anybody who wants to get rich should adopt.

In his groundbreaking Secrets of the Millionaire Mind, T. Harv Eker states: "Give me five minutes, and I can predict your financial future for the rest of your life!" Eker does this by identifying your "money and success blueprint." We all have a personal money blueprint ingrained in our subconscious minds, and it is this blueprint, more than anything, that will determine our financial lives. You can know everything about marketing, sales, negotiations, stocks, real estate, and the world of finance, but if your money blueprint is not set for a high level of success, you will never have a lot of money—and if somehow you do, you will most likely lose it! The good news is that now you can actually reset your money blueprint to create natural and automatic success.

Secrets of the Millionaire Mind is two books in one. 

Part I - Your Money Blueprint: This chapter explains how your money blueprint works. Through Eker's rare combination of street smarts, humor, and heart, you will learn how your childhood influences have shaped your financial destiny. You will also learn how to identify your own money blueprint and "revise" it to not only create success but, more important, to keep and continually grow it. It explains how each of us is conditioned to think and act when it comes to money and outline four key strategies for revising our mental money blueprint. 

We are conditioned in three primary ways:

1. Verbal Programming - What did you hear when you were young?  

2. Modeing - What did you see when you were young? and 

3. Specific incidents - What did you experience when you were young?

Steps for changing these; one need to go through - Awareness; Understanding; Disassociation, Declaration. 

Combine the inner game (the toolbox) with the outer game (the tools), results will go through the roof.  Dig out the massive, toxic weed from inner 'financial garden', get inundated with more fruits! 

Wealth Principle:

1. Give me five minutes and I can predict your financial future for the rest of your life
2.  P-) T -)F-)A=R; Programming leads to Thoughts, Thoughts lead to feelings, Feelings lead to actions and actions lead to results. 
3. When the subconscious mind must choose between deeply rooted emotions and logic, emotions will almost always win
4. If your motivation for acquiring money or success comes from a nonsupportive root such as fear, anger, or the need to 'prove' yourself, your money will never bring your happiness. (Don't plan to save for a raining day - you will attract rainy day in your life. Save for Joy days)
5. The only way to permanently change the temperature in the room is to reset the thermostat. In the same way, the only way to change your level of financial success 'permanently' is to reset your financial thermostat. 
6. Consciousness is observing your thoughts and actions so that you can live from true choice in the present moment rather than being run by programming from the past. 

Both the Midas touch and the kiss-of-death syndromes are nothing more than the manifestations of money blueprints. Entertain only those thoughts that empower you. 

Remember:

1 Specific thought patterns preprogram our wealth.

2 Our thought patterns are shaped by what our parents taught us about money.

3 We unconsciously reproduce the income strategies of our parents.

4 Before changing your way of thinking, perform a thorough inventory.

5 Breaking the pattern with new guiding principles and new behavior.

6 If you want to be rich, you have to learn to take fate into your own hands.

7 Future millionaires should have a positive attitude towards money.

8 You can only get rich if you give it your all.

9 Reach for the stars if you want to become a millionaire.

10 You can only make money grow when you handle it properly.

11 You have to think highly of yourself if you want to be successful and rich.

 

The key to success is to raise your own energy; when you do, people will naturally be attracted to you. And when they show up, bill 'em! . These four quadrants are the physical world, the mental world, the emotional world, and the spiritual world.

Mind is nothing more than a big file cabinet.  

Part II - The Wealth Files: you will be introduced to seventeen "Wealth Files," which describe exactly how rich people think and act differently than most poor and middle-class people. Each Wealth File includes action steps for you to practice in the real world in order to dramatically increase your income and accumulate wealth.

Change your not-doing habits into doing habits. Go from reading to doing. 

Wealth Principle:

1. You can choose to think in ways that will support you in your happiness and success instead of ways that don't.
2. There is no such thing as a really rich victim! Only thing they get is attention. If that is what you want. 
3. If your goal is to be comfortable, chances are you'll never get rich. But if your goal is to be rich, chances are you'll end up mighty comfortable. 
4. The number one reason most people don't get what they want is that they don't know what they want. 
5. If you are not fully, totally and truly committed to creating wealth, chances are you won't
6. The Law of Income: You will be paid in direct proportion to the value you deliver according to the marketplace. 
7. Bless that which you want. - Huna philosophy. 
8. Leaders earn a heck of a lot more money than followers
9. The secret to success is not to try to avoid or get rid of or shrink from your problems; the secret is to grow yourself so that you are bigger than any problem. 
10. If you have a big problem in your life, all that means is that you are being a small person
11. If you say you're worthy, you are. If you say you're not worthy, you're not. Either way you will live into your story. 
12. If a hundred-foot oak tree had the mind of a human, it would only grow to be ten feet tall!
13. For every giver there must be a receiver, and for every receiver there must be a giver. 
14. Money will only make you more of what you already are.
15. How you do anything is how you do everything.
16. There's nothing wrong with getting a steady paycheck, unless it interferes with your ability to earn what you're worth. There's the rub. It usually does. 
17. Never have a ceiling on your income. 
18. Rich people believe "You can have your cake and eat it too." Middle-class people believe "Cake is too rich, so I'll only have a little piece." Poor people don't believe they deserve cake, so they order a doughnut, focus on the hole, and wonder why they have 'nothing'.
19. The true measure of wealth is net worth, not working income.  (Income both working and passive, savings, Investments, Simplification) Simplification - You need less money to live - lifestyle. 
20. Where attention goes, energy flows and results show. 
21. Until you show you can handle what you've got, you won't get any more!
22. The habit of manging your money is more important than the amount. 
23. Either you control money, or it will control you. 
24. Rich people see every dollar as a 'seed' that can be planted to earn a hundred more dollars, which can then be replanted to earn a thousand more dollars. 
25. Action is the "bridge" between the inner world and the outer world. 
26. A true warrior can "tame the cobra of fear"
27. It is not necessary to try to get rid of fear in order to succeed.
28. If you are willing to do only what's easy, life will be hard. But if you are willing to do what's hard, life will be easy. 
29. The only time you are actually growing is when you are uncomfortable. 
30. Training and managing your own mind is the most important skill you could ever own, in terms of both happiness and success. 
31. You can be right or you can be rich, but you can't be both. (Right here means holding on to your old ways of thinking and being. {Also happiness}
32. Every master was once a disaster. 
33. To get paid the best, you must be the best. 

If you keep doing what you've always done, you'll keep getting what you've always got. 

~Eric Hoffer; "The learners shall inherit the earth while the learned will be beautifully equipped to live in a world that no longer exists. " 

CEREMONY: Eliminate all distractions; kneel down on one knee and bow your head in respect: "BY THE POWER INVESTED IN ME, I HEREBY ANOINT YOU AS 'WORTHY'FROM NOW UNTIL FOREVER MORE!"

If you are not doing as well financially as you would like, you will have to change your money blueprint. Unfortunately your current money blueprint will tend to stay with you for the rest of your life, unless you identify and revise it, and that's exactly what you will do with the help of this extraordinary book. According to T. Harv Eker, it's simple. If you think like rich people think and do what rich people do, chances are you'll get rich too!

Wealth files  - 

1. Believe: Rich 'I create my life' ; Poor 'Life happens to me' : Blame, justification, complaining (Ask how?)
2. Play: Rich 'To win' ; Poor 'To Not lose'
3. Commitment: Rich 'To being Rich' ; Poor 'Wanting to be rich' - Know what you want Levels - want/choose/Commit.
4. Think : Rich 'Big'; Poor 'Small'.
5. Focus: Rich 'Opportunities' ; Poor 'Obstacles'
6. Attitude towards people : Rich 'Admire other rich and successful' ; Poor 'Resent rich and successful'
7. Association: Rich 'with positive, successful people' ; Poor 'negative, unsuccessful' people
8. Promotions: Rich 'Willing to promote themselves and their values'; Poor think negatively about selling and promotion. 
9. Problems : Rich 'Bigger than their problem ; Poor 'smaller'
10. Receivers: Rich 'excellent' ; Poor 'Poor'
11. Payment: Rich 'Results'; Poor 'Time'.
12. Think: Rich 'both/and' ' Poor 'either/or'
13. Focus: Rich 'Net worth' ; Poor 'working income'.
14. Manage: Rich 'Manage' well; Poor 'mismanage' 
15. Work : Rich 'Money work hard for people' ; Poor 'People work hard for money'
16. Fear : Rich 'Act inspite of fear';  Poor 'Let fear stop them'
17. Learn: Rich 'constantly learn and grow'; poor 'think they already know'. 
18. Success: Rich 'Be, Do, Have' ; Poor 'Have, Do, Be'. (Be successful, ..have money)

12 Final Summary : So what the heck Do I do now? 

https://millionairemindevents.com/millionaire-mind-book-bonuses/

Declaration:

"I have a Millionaire Mind."

Place your hand on your heart and say:

  ~ T. Harv Eker (Author), ' Secrets of the Millionaire Mind: Mastering the Inner Game of Wealth Hardcover'.

Keep your commitment. Remember, if you are not as successful as you want to be, there is something you do not know. 

~ W.H. Murray, during one of his Himalayan expedition:

'Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness. Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one's favour all manner of unforeseen incidents, meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamt would have come his way. '

Financial freedom: Ability to live the lifestyle you desire without having to work or relay on anyone else for money.

Late Migrations: A Natural History of Love and Loss - Margaret Renkl

Margaret Renkl is the author of 'Late Migrations: A Natural History of Love and Loss' capture the cycle of life  that will make you want to stay put, reread and savor ever thing about the moment. ....her life story and her life's passion intertwine, like a fence post and a trumpet vine, as well as paintings by her brother.  

Renkl was born in Andalusia, Alabama, and moved with her family to Birmingham, Alabama as a child. Renkl spent much of her childhood out-of-doors, with frequent visits to her maternal grandparents, who remained in Lower Alabama.

"Blessed are the parents whose final words on leaving—the house, the car, the least consequential phone call—are always “I love you.” They will leave behind children who are lost and still found, broken and, somehow, still whole."

The Way You Looked At Me

“My parents and my grandparents and my great-grandmother, all of them, have gathered to watch over me. They are looking at me as if I were the sun, as of they had been cold every day of their lives until now.

I am the sun, but they are not the planets. 

They are the universe.”

~ Margaret Renkl, ‘Late Migrations’

This could have been me. No, it was me indeed. Another place, another time, similar characters. sepiatoned

"In the Storm, Safe from the Storm," Renkl recalls summer thunderstorms when she would sit on her father's lap in a chair placed in the open front door of their little house. She says:

The rain comes and I feel it with the tips of my toes, but they are the only parts of me that get wet, for I have drawn my knees up to my chest under my nightgown, and my father has unbuttoned his corduroy jacket and pulled it around me, and wrapped his arms around me too. I lean into him. I feel the heat from his body and the cool rain from the world, both at once.

But, all too soon, Renkl is writing about leaving home to go to graduate school, kissing, marrying, having children, watching them grow up and away, and taking on the role of caregiver as her parents age and die.

Not all is loss. After her father's death, Renkl says her 71-year-old mother, who'd grown up on an Alabama peanut farm and "had no feeling at all for stories as a source of pleasure or solace," discovered the novels of Jane Austen and then became such a voracious reader she went on to devour racy Jane Austen fan fiction! But all too soon, Renkl's mother succumbs to a cerebral hemorrhage. About her humble mother's last ride from house to hospital, Renkl writes: "She left in a state much larger than herself — two fire trucks, an ambulance, a rolling stretcher pushed by big men."

Late Migrations is a book about grief, yet within that grief lies beauty, wonder, and love. It is also a book about nature and family, and it is self-conscious enough to understand that the wild world and the domestic one exist in a braided ecosystem that hums with meaning. Reminding Us Of Life's Beauty And Fragility.

Human beings are creatures made for joy. Against all evidence, we tell ourselves that grief and loneliness and despair are tragedies, unwelcome variations from the pleasure and calm and safety that in the right way of the world would form the firm ground of our being. In the fairy tale we tell ourselves, darkness holds nothing resembling a gift. 

What we feel always contains its own truth, but it is not the only truth, and darkness almost always harbors some bit of goodness tucked out of sight, waiting for an unexpected light to shine, to reveal it in the deepest hiding place. 

Some stories, so resonated with me; felt like my story: Grieving, and diagnosing a lump in the breast when father is undergoing chemo and dying. For me it was like a competition, both of us lying side by side. Mother being our care taker. He did go. I wasn't dying. I was grieving. I wasn't dying. Not yet. 

Chapter 'What I could save' ends with - 'I saved all these things. But what I couldn't save weighs on my heart like a stone.'

Stroke like Strike, for the Essay competition when at Veegaland say:

"Earth and air won't cease their quarrel. tornadoes take up their form in the Midwest, a writhing cone of sol and breath and bite. 

Hurricanes shoulder and churn off the Gulf coast, each one a gray ferocity, a roaring violence of roiling water. 

Volcanic ash rises in the Philippines. Air becomes mass; dust becomes rock; the sky is raining fire and no hissing rain will come to cool it. 

The ocean floor cracks open in the Pacific, heaving waves of nausea across the surface of the sea. 

A scar down the middle of the Mississippi River unzips and fills the world with livid water.

In Nashville, a brain breaks open. 

In the universe, a star folds in on itself. 

And God said, 'Let there be darkness. 

There is chapter on 'Lexicon' with last words and interactions - 'I love you' & 'Thank You' and there are letters with my parents. 

Derek Walcott quote at the end really summed it up - “So much to do still, all of it praise.”.

Writing about mothers favourite home she thought it to be 'a gift to her, understanding', brother doubted that it would make her feel bad, and . When her mother saw it, 'One day she banged open the door of my office and slammed a copy of the magazine down on the desk. "What is this?' she yelled, her face so flushed the scalp showed pink beneath her clean white hair.'

Dreaming about our loved ones no more; we do wonder, 'It was just a misunderstanding. You're alive.'

Indeed 'There's an art to helping people without making htem feel bad about needing help. It's an art I was learning but hadn't wholly mastered with Mom. '......The end of caregiving isn't freedome. The end of caregiving is grief.

Part 2 of the book is called Ashes. 

You'll never know how much I love You :  Basic fear, the fear of loss. How we look at our loved ones. To know they are breathing and fine. 

With own nest emptying, metaphors of loss are everywhere. "Why did I spend so much time watching for the next milestone when the next milestone never meant the freedom I expected?"

The house that has been loud, fall silent. No more good bye. 

All through as I had been reading the book, kept wondering how and why this title? Was it because family moved? Then comes the essay, almost at the fag end, on Late Migrations. On how Renkly planted 'zinnias' to attract bees and butterfly. These attracted Monarchs. "Monarchs migrate as birds do, but it takes them 4-5 generation to complete. ......Entomologists don't yet understand what makes successive generations follow the same route their ancestors took....'

But the shadow side of love is always loss, and grief is only love’s own twin. My mother was twelve when Mama Alice died. Papa Doc sat down on the porch and settled there, staring at the rambling rosebushes growing beside the road. “He just made up his mind to die, I guess,” my mother always said. “He lasted barely more than a month.”

And then in conclusion:

 This talk of making peace with it. Of feeling it and then finding a way through. Of closure. It's all nonsense. Here is what no one told me about grief: you inhabit it like a skin. Everywhere you go, you wear grief under your clothes. Everything you see, you see through it , like a film. It is not a hidden hair shirt of suffering. It is only you, the thing you are, the cells that cling to each other in your shape., the muscles that are doing your work in the world. .......Like other...it too will change in time. It will change so slowly you won't even see it happening. 

'You are waking into a new shape. You are waking into an old self. 

What I mean is, 

 ~ time offers your old self a new shape. 

~you are the old, ungrieving you, and you are also the new, ruined you. 

You are both and you will always be both. 

There is nothing to fear. There is nothing at all to fear. Walk out into the springtime and look; the birds welcome you with a chorus. The flowers turn their faces to your face. The last of last year's leaves, still damp in the shadows, smell ripe and faintly of fall. 

Holy, Holy, Holy ~ the world will go on. World flaring up in celebration. Someone hearing "It's benign."; "It's a boy' ; Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!

~ Margaret Renkl, ‘Late Migrations’ Again from a post by Bindu Manoj. Thank you

Instagram - Daily Task : 66 Days Challenge

 DREAM big but PREPARE yourself for it.

https://www.youtube.com/@MichelleGifford

Here are the Reels specs you should keep in mind:

Up to 90 seconds long;

Aspect ratio of 9:16;

Size of 1080 x 1920 pixels;

Cover photo size: 1080 x 1920 pixels.

Open the Instagram video editor

There are multiple ways to open the Instagram Reels editor.

Open your Instagram profile or a feed, click on the plus icon ➕ and choose Reel.

Open the Reels tab on Instagram, find the camera icon at the top right corner and click on it.

Or open the story editor by swiping the main feed right and find Reels in the bottom of the screen.

Regardless of the method you choose, the same editor opens, which is similar in functionality to the Stories editor.

In the Reels editor, you can:

Select music from the Instagram library;

Specify the duration of the video (up to 90 seconds);

Select video speed (slowdown x3 and x5, acceleration x2 and x3);

Choose a layout format;

Set a timer showing the time until the end of the video (you can also turn on the timer for up to 60 seconds);

Choose filters and lenses the same as those in Stories.

Upload a pre-shot Reel

Apart from creating a Reel right on Instagram, you can also shoot a video in a third-party video editor and then upload it on Instagram.

When uploading a pre-shot video, you can trim the clip, if necessary, right in the Reels editor.

Videos can be divided into fragments – scenes. In total, the timing of all clips will not exceed 30 seconds. You can also shoot one clip first, then add a video from your phone and record again: all the clips you create will be in one Reel.

Besides, this adds a new item to the Reels menu – Align tool, which enables you to add and remove an object between the Reel's scenes. This will create an appearing or disappearing effect.

When you start a scene at the point the previous frame ends, it will look like an object or a person suddenly pops up in the scene.

How to add filters to Instagram Reels

1. Open the Reels editor.

2. Find ✨Effects icon above the record button.

You'll see a pack of available filters at the bottom of your screen.

3. To search for more effects, click on the sparkles icon, a bookmark icon to find the filters you saved, an arrow icon to discover more available filters, or a magnifying glass icon to open the search field and look for filters by entering keywords.

4. To record a filter in your Reel, hold on the filter icon or use the timer feature.

5. If you like the Reel with the filter applied, press the Preview button. You'll be headed over to the editing screen, where you can add captions, sounds, stickers, and more filters to your Reel.

6. Click Next if you want to share the Reel with your audience.

How to use the Align tool in Instagram Reels

Open the Reels editor.

To start recording, select any effects or songs you'd like to add in the Reel and press the Record button.

When you finish recording the scene, you'll see a new icon on the left, which looks like two overlaid squares. This is the Align tool.

3. Tap the two square button, and you'll see a semi-transparent view of the last frame you've recorded.

4. Add an object or a person to the scene by pressing the Record button with Reel logo. Align your last frame with the one you just added and press the record button again.

5. Tap the Preview button to open the editing screen when you're done.

6. Tap Next when you want to share the post.

To record an Instagram Reel hands-free:

Set up a timer by clicking on the clock icon on the left-hand menu.

Set up a countdown timer by choosing between 3 and 10 seconds.

Drag the timer to set how long the video should be.

Instagram Reels Voice Filters

Yes, filters can now be applied not only to your face but to your voice as well. And now, in addition to voiceovers, sound effects, and backing tracks, you can also change your voice with filters, such as robotic, giant, or helium voice.

Choose any filter the same way you do when selecting a music track to use as a backgound sound in your videos in the Effects tab when editing your Reel. Select the filter to apply it to the Reel and press Done to see the preview. Then post a Reel as you normally would.  

Accurate Lip-Syncing on Instagram Reels

The key to success when lip-syncing isn't about learning the lyrics all by heart. The trick is to use the slow-it-down feature to make sure you can lip-sync every line. To use it, tap the music icon in the Create mode and choose a song or a sound clip. Next, choose a part of the song you want in your Reel.

Then hit the 1x icon and select 3x to slow down the clip by 300%. Now record the Reel and lip-sync to the super slow song. Don't worry; when you preview the Reel, the speed will get back to normal, and you'll look funnily fast.

Instagram Comments with Reels

Instagram added this feature in 2022; the decision was clearly inspired by TikTok. So just like on TikTok, you can now respond to comments with a Reel! When you do, your comment becomes a sticker you can add to your video for additional engagement and even more comments.

To use the feature, open one of your Reels and find a comment that draws your attention. Tap Reply, the text field will pop up, and you'll see a blue camera icon. Tap it to record a Reel comment.

Hands-Free Recording of Instagram Reels

Another way to streamline Reels creation is to use this hack — hands-free recording.

To make ones, you need to open the Reels video editor or a third-party video editor, shoot a Reel, edit it and upload it back on Instagram.

Reels:

Day 1

Today, you will create Action based - List Reel.

Sample Reels

https://www.instagram.com/p/CwC0FjngpYY/

https://www.instagram.com/p/Cub8Nkau0dh/

Ensure that you pick your Topic Idea from your well-researched plan. No random reel.

When uploading, check key points -

Trending Music

Text synched with your action

Text clearly visible

Caption

Good Hashtags

Good aesthetics

Good resolution video

Enjoy the journey!!!

2. Day 2: Action based List reel with Changed background.

Similar to Day 1 but - apply Greenscreen effect and change the background.

Sample reel - https://www.instagram.com/p/CvHaAWHOHgs/

Ensure that you pick your Topic Idea from your well-researched plan. No random reel.

When uploading, check key points -

Trending Music

Text synched with your action

Text clearly visible

Caption

Good Hashtags

Good aesthetics

Good resolution video

Enjoy the journey!

 Day 3

Add Multiple Clips in your reel and apply transition to those clips.

Either they can be one single video and you can split them and then apply transition or it can be different clips taken at different places and added together in 1 reel.

Sample reels - https://www.instagram.com/p/CuTeQxuoZql/

Ensure that you pick your Topic Idea from your well-researched plan. No random reel.

When uploading, check key points -

Trending Music

Text synched with your action

Text clearly visible

Caption

Good Hashtags

Good aesthetics

Good resolution video

Day 4: Up down Question Answer reel.

Today, you can going to do Up Down Reel with something appears on the top and something appears at the bottom. Check out the sample reel.

So, it can be used to do - "instead of this, do this" or "Myth - truth" kind of reel.

Sample Reel: https://www.instagram.com/p/CvZwbIUIoDU/

Don't forget to follow the rules of posting!!!

Happy Reeling!

https://youtu.be/tsORwlzGR0s?si=86p_Yw5JKYbUCXyf

5. Day 5

Today, you are going to make a Speeded up Reel (Speeding the video by 2x or 3x or 4x)

Sample reel: https://www.instagram.com/p/CwKk9xkA9RS/

Ensure the resolution of the video is HD/highest.

Good video

Full aspect ratio (9:16)

Value in your reel.

Proper hashtags used.

Day 6

Use Sound Effect in your reel today to add drama.

Sample reel: https://www.instagram.com/p/CxVVh-RrPK

Checks:

Good Storytelling

Sound Effect

Good resolution video

Trending Music

Day 7

3 Scenes Reel

Capture 3 different videos (related to a theme) and then make a single reel with it.

Sample reel: https://www.instagram.com/p/Cq7Dmdxp-bF/

Day 8

Do a Slow-Motion reel today.

Sample reel: https://www.instagram.com/p/Cp4ADtRrsvj/

In slow mo, you can either show a life's moment or add value or share your experience of a story.

Day 9

Today, you are going to split your video in multiple videos and apply transition.

Apply Warp or Slide right transition to your reel.

Ensure that these splits are in sync with your text, and music.

Sample reel - https://www.instagram.com/p/Cw45VyOLU7a/

https://www.instagram.com/p/CwRrkuHoXOW/

Day 10

Today, you are going to add a filter (zoom-in) that will move the camera as you make the reel.

Go to Reels Create, search for effects "Zoom in" and apply one of them to create a reel with this effect.

It can be a 5 secrets reel or a storytelling reel.

Day 11

Today, we will start with speaking in reels.

So, the first reel is giving value to your reader.

Start with a hook, give value and end it with a call to action.

Ensure that you are using a trending background music and some sound effects.

Additional feature to use: Use Captions from Instagram or Tool like captions.ai to add captions to your reel.

Sample reel: https://www.instagram.com/reel/CxqRGmwywnf/

https://www.instagram.com/p/Cxnft0PL3AK/

Day 12

Today, you are going to do a 3-point reel but you are speaking the hook and the 3 points in it.

In this reel, you can say the point, pause the reel, then read your next point and shoot it in small clips.

You don't need a script for this reel. And you don't need to by-heart the content. You can shoot it point by point and then put it all together in a reel.

Add all the clips together, add animation to the clips (on inshot app or canvas app) or you can add transitions in the Instagram app.

Add captions to the reel using Captions.ai or Instagram inbuilt feature.

When posting, ensure that you have a good reel description with hashtags.

Day 13

Today, you are going to experiment “Voiceover” feature of instagram.

In this reel, you are going to take a quote, and speak that in the background using Voiceover feature in instagram. 

In the video, you can show yourself walking or some other aesthetic video of you.

Use a trending background music when posting it.

Sample reel: https://www.instagram.com/reel/Cxq9-YfAsRz/

Day 14

Today, you are going to experiment “Voiceover” feature of instagram with a product in the video.

Product can be a book or can be anything else.

In this reel, you are going to take a product, show it in different angles and speak about it in the background using Voiceover feature in instagram. 

Use a trending background music when posting it.

Sample reel: https://www.instagram.com/reel/CUa_kFUDcYE/

https://www.instagram.com/p/Cw5XxOKIWEk/

Day 15

Today, you are going to become someone else using an instagram feature and enact something related to your audience. 

See if you can focus on one problem of your audience and they are in your reel - meaning you become your audience and speak the problem out. 

These are relatable reels. Dont forget to add a solution and call to action in the reel.

Use a trending background music when posting it. A description with hashtags is a must.

Sample reel:

https://www.instagram.com/p/Cvw3S8WoWMI/

Day 16

Today, you are going to do a small skit - can have 2 to 3 people in this reel. All of them are enacted by you. First person can be with a different hairstyle or different age - use effect to change hairstyle or age. Second person can be you - yourself.

See if you can focus on one problem of your audience and they are in your reel - meaning you become your audience and speak their problem out. Then you become yourself to solve the problem.

These are relatable reels. Dont forget to add a solution and call to action in the reel.

Use a trending background music when posting it. A description with hashtags is a must.

Sample reel:

https://www.instagram.com/p/Cvw3S8WoWMI/

Day 17

Today, you are going to do an unboxing reel.

Unboxing a book can be a good reel for authors.

You can pack a book or order a book and then record this reel.

Use a trending background music when posting it. A description with hashtags is a must.

Sample reel:

https://www.instagram.com/reel/CWC0hhDIw03/

Day 18

Today, you are going to do a book signing reel.

Take a stack of your books and start signing it and shoot it from different angles.

Put an inspiring message on it or a voiceover.

Don't forget a CTA.

Sample reel: https://www.instagram.com/reel/CYS6M8ul3tn/

Day 19

UGC

Today, you are going to repost User Generated Content (meaning someone else’s reel) which has gone viral and is relevant for your audience.

Use one of the Repost Apps to repost reel on instagram.

Sample reel:

https://www.instagram.com/p/CxuNewjLZEi/

UGC

Day 20

Today, you are going to participate in someone's challenge. It can be dance/fitness/food/books any kind of challenge. This is going to be something about you.

Ensure that it is a trending challenge/music/dance.

Sample Reel: https://www.instagram.com/reel/CqwyseaPKT5/

Day 21

Today, you are going to lip-sync a trending dialogue that is related to your niche and audience.

Sample reel: https://www.instagram.com/p/CxOCFVuNMiG/

https://www.instagram.com/p/CwfwKNNtNHW/

Day 21

Today, you are going to lip-sync a trending dialogue that is related to your niche and audience.

Sample reel: https://www.instagram.com/p/CxOCFVuNMiG/

https://www.instagram.com/p/CwfwKNNtNHW/

Day 22

Today, you are going to do generic transition reel.

In this reel, music is very important and along with music, there is a transition to something.

So, start with something basic and end with something amazing.

Generally used by fashion and makeup creators. But, one can apply it to showcase any product or service as well.

Sample reel: 

https://www.instagram.com/p/CxQiEZ5M6yh/

https://www.instagram.com/p/CyCoywaOt_G/

Day 23

Chutki/Snap Transition Reel

Today, you are going to do chutki/snap transition reel.

In this reel, music is very important and along with music, there is a transition to something. And the transition happens with a chutki.

So, start with something basic and end with something amazing.

Sample reel:https://www.instagram.com/p/CpVC7IvDJtD/?hl=en

Day 24

Wrist Bump Transition Reel

Today, you are going to do wrist-wrist bump transition reel.

In this reel, music is very important and along with music, there is a transition to something. And the transition happens with a wrist to wrist bumping / dance step.

So, start with something basic and end with something amazing.

Sample reel:

https://www.instagram.com/p/CxfZ-UtK5Aq/

Day 25

Clapping Transition

Today, you are going to do clapping transition reel.

In this reel, music is very important and along with music, there is a transition to something. And the transition happens with a clapping.

So, start with something basic and end with something amazing.

Day 26

Clap and Swipe Transition

Today, you are going to do swipe transition reel.

In this reel, music is very important and along with music, there is a transition to something. And the transition happens with a swipe.

So, start with something basic and end with something amazing.

For eg. You clap and swipe to the next slide and next slide and next slide.

Ideal for 5 or n points reel where you clap and swipe to show the 5 points of your topic.

Day 27

Jump Transition

Today, you are going to do jump transition reel.

In this reel, music is very important and along with music, there is a transition to something. And the transition happens with a jump.

So, start with something basic and end with something amazing.

For eg. You jump and enter a new location. You jump and show a new thing.

Ideal for travellers or makeup artists or dancers to show a new location.

Day 28

Camera Tap Hook

In this reel, you grab the audience's attention with a tap/knock on your phone camera and apply the knocking sound effect at the start.

The topic can be anything but you start with a knocking action on the camera and the sound.

Day 29

Clothes throwing transition

Apt for showing different getups/dress-ups/perspectives

In this reel, with right music, you transition from one to next by throwing clothes on the camera.

Day 30

Object-Based Transition

In this reel, you hold some object at the start and then with music, it changes to some other object.

For eg. You show mobile in your hand and in the transition it gets changed to a book seamlessly. So the transition is so seamless that it almost feels like magic.

General topics:

• Magic Miracle Manifesting memories Monday
• Tuesday - good books
• Wednesday - word of the day
• Thursday - Your book
• Friday - Fun
• Saturday - Nature
• Sunday - Family/Friends

To give captions - you can use that option. 

To share reel, you can - Save and click remix, then edit and share.