DISC Test

 https://www.tonyrobbins.com/disc/

"If there is a rare opportunity in life, it's self-awareness. Self-awareness of the difference between you and your patterns and the impact of your patterns on those around you."

- Tony Robbins -

Learn how to communicate better and achieve your goals:

DISCOVER WHAT DRIVES YOU WITH A DISC TEST

Self-awareness is essential to success. If you don't understand what drives your actions and behaviors, it's difficult to cultivate positive growth. As you discover what inspires you, you’ll identify what may hold you back from success, as well as the traits, habits and behaviors that propel you forward. When you take the DISC assessment, you will learn how to leverage the various aspects of your personality for a life of achievement that aligns with your personal values. Who is an ideal candidate for the DISC test? The DISC personality test is for anyone who wants to gain insight into themselves. It increases self-knowledge and can uncover limiting beliefs that hold you back from achieving your goals. It can also help you develop strategies to create a breakthrough in any area of your life. In most cases, a DISC assessment is used in a team-based setting. Identifying the communication needs of the individuals on a team facilitates better conflict resolution and overall stronger cohesiveness. These assessments are also useful in a sales environment, training members of a sales team to recognize and respond to the unique styles of their prospects or customers.

WHAT IS A DISC ASSESSMENT?

More than two million people have taken the 15-minute DISC assessment to better understand their personality type and behavioral style. Developed by psychologist William Moulton Marston, the DISC assessment examines how an individual ranks in the four areas of behavior – Dominance, Influence, Steadiness and Conscientiousness. Designed for both individuals who want to identify and maximize their strengths and motivators, and organizations looking to integrate high-performance teams, this $250 DISC profile is yours free of charge. DISC stands for “Dominance, Influence, Steadiness and Conscientiousness,” which are the four primary personality traits the test measures. Everyone has these four characteristics, but the strength of each varies depending on the person. The assessment can provide a common language that people can use to understand themselves and others. For example, you may score highly in dominance and influence while your colleague ranks in steadiness and conscientiousness. This can lead to misunderstandings and conflict if you and your colleague don’t attempt to understand what makes you different and how to best communicate with each other. None of the DISC personality traits are inherently positive or negative. The test and results are non-judgmental and help those who take it respond to conflict, resolve problems and discover what lies behind their common habits or working styles.

We’ve all heard the adage that the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. I’d like to congratulate you on joining the group of people who know, as I do, that the #1 secret to happiness isn't fame, money, freedom or even love. It's growth. It's progress. And I am not talking about CHANGE. There have been so many changes this year, due to circumstances in the external world that are beyond our control. Change is automatic. Progress is not. Progress is the result of conscious thought, decision, and action – and these are all internal, within ourselves. Despite what is happening in the world, you are 100% in control of your own progress. Here is a simple formula for you: Progress = Happiness. If you are progressing personally, professionally, emotionally, spiritually...you will be happy. Happiness comes from setting a goal, and moving towards it, step by step, until you finally achieve it. The question now is, what have you been meaning to do that you’re afraid to tackle? What journey are you longing to take but can’t seem to get started? Is it the journey to a peak state of health, to start a new business, to renew the passion in your relationship? Whatever it is, I will help get you there. As part of my community, you now have access to everything you’ll need to start your journey towards happiness and fulfillment. When you are ready, head over to my website to find more information on my virtual events, training programs, and coaching services. I’m honored that you’ve chosen me as your partner on this incredible journey to make your life a masterpiece – to do, be, and create exactly what you wish. Live with passion! Tony Robbins UNDERSTANDING DISC & MOTIVATORS DISC STYLES DISC is a simple, practical, easy to remember and universally applicable model. It focuses on individual patterns of external, observable behaviors and measures the intensity of characteristics using scales of directness and openness for each of the four styles: Dominance, Influence, Steadiness, and Conscientious. Your DISC Style: Formalist Formalist rely upon procedure and structure in all aspects of life. They are detailed oriented and seek perfection. They need to know the expectations and the timetable for their work. They can get bogged down in detail and will not rush important decisions. They will take a risk if they have the facts to support it. They may be initially suspicious of personal compliments, praise or flattery.  Emotionally: Internally focuses energy on holding themselves to exacting standards and doing things right; may appear reserved and restrained.  Your goal: To achieve stable and reliable accomplishments.  How you value others: The consistent ability to be precise and accurate.  How you influence a group: Through detailed and accurate input to team efforts.  The value you bring to an organization: Will embrace and support high quality and expected standards.  Cautions: Rely too much on past procedures; can become rule bound.  When under pressure: May revert to too much diplomacy and overly careful maneuvering.  What you fear: Aggressive, risky and confronting interactions; superficial personal relationships An Overview of Your DISC Style Below are some key behavioral insights to keep in mind and share with others to strengthen your relationships. Meera, people who score like you may tend to get bogged down in details during the decision-making process, thinking that there may be more information forthcoming that might impact the choice. It's true that there will almost always be more information available if we continue to wait; however, there is also a time at which the collection of data must stop and the decision must be made. Be aware of this when facing a series of data-driven decisions. Your response pattern indicates that you tend to hide your emotions. You are generally quiet in a group unless asked for input, or if the topic is one of high importance to you. Our advice is to move out of that comfort zone and be a bit more verbal. It will benefit the team, because many will not have considered the issues as deeply as you have. Your input will raise the quality of the conversation. And you will benefit by being perceived as a more open and interactive person. You take calculated, educated risks only after a thoughtful analysis of the facts and data, and after you have examined all options and potential outcomes. This is a strength. However, when the team has a deadline, you could be perceived as a bottleneck to the process. Not maliciously, but because you want to analyze the facts and data and determine all possible outcomes as a result of a decision. Be aware of this, and be prepared to abbreviate the analysis a bit when the clock is ticking. You tend to evaluate others by how well they implement and execute procedures, standards, and quality action. You hold others accountable to the same high standards that you maintain for yourself. Those who demonstrate these high standards (as you know, they are somewhat rare) are individuals that you will tend to hold in esteem. Your score pattern indicates that you tend to maintain a keen awareness of time. You tend to be on time or early for appointments, and expect the same consideration of your time from others. It annoys you when certain people are perpetually late, or when meetings drag on with no assigned time to end. You tend to make decisions slowly and carefully, only after consideration of all variables and input from others. Of the many patterns of behavioral styles, your scores put you among a minority of the population (a positive minority) who show the trait of careful and deliberate decision making when it comes to important decisions. We specify "important," because you may make routine decisions rather rapidly. An Overview of Your Motivators Aesthetic - Strong desire and need to achieve equilibrium between the world around us and ourselves (within) while creating a sustainable work/life balance between the two. Creative, imaginative, arty, mystical and expressive, this style may redefine or resist real world approaches to current challenges. Based on your Motivators assessment Aesthetic score: You appreciate real-world approaches and “feet on the ground” thinking and will view those with their “head in the clouds” as impractical. • You may view "feeling good" as a secondary and not a primary driver at work. • You likely believe creative people waste time and are too focused on non-essentials. • You are not likely to connect with impractical ideas emotionally or professionally. • You believe something's usefulness is more important than its appearance. Economic - The motivation for security from self-interest, economic gains, and achieving real-world returns on personal ventures, personal resources, and focused energy. The preferred approach of this motivator is both a personal and a professional one with a focus on ultimate outcomes. Based on your Motivators assessment Economic score: You will balance yourself between being satisfied with what you have and a need for more. • You are realistic and down-to-earth in regards to getting what you believe you deserve. • Your score indicates that there would be no excessive need to win when engaging with others. • You have the ability to identify with individuals who have both high and low satisfaction rates. • You may have already achieved substantial economic goals of your own. Individualistic - Need to be seen as autonomous, unique, independent, and to stand apart from the crowd. This is the drive to be socially independent and have opportunity for freedom of personal expression apart from being told what to do. Based on your Motivators assessment Individualistic score: You will seek independence, freedom, and positions of autonomy where you can freely express and display your reasoning. • You will likely have out-of-the-box ideas and want to share them. • If you were a penny in a jar of 500 pennies, you'd need to be the red one. • You will seek your own personal niche where you can be seen as unbelievable. • You'll likely take the necessary risks depending upon your appetite for jumping off the cliff and building your wings on the way down. Power - Being seen as a leader, while having influence and control over one's environment and success. Competitiveness and control is often associated with those scoring higher in this motivational dimension. Based on your Motivators assessment Power score: You can mediate all available ideas without an excessive need to control outcomes. • You will likely be on board with leaders who are competent, but may struggle with leaders who seem unskilled. • You can be both cooperative and competitive depending on the situation at hand. • You're a stabilizing force in normal team operations and will lead if necessary, but you don't need to. • You are able to understand both aggressive and passive leaders An Overview of your Motivators - Continued Altruistic - An expression of the need or energy to benefit others at the expense of self. At times, there’s genuine sincerity in this dimension to help others, but not always. Oftentimes an intense level within this dimension is more associated with low self-worth. Based on your Motivators assessment Altruistic score: You will seek to benefit others at your own personal expense and may find it very difficult to fight for what you want. • You will see the value in others much quicker than you will see it in yourself. • When your loss creates a win for someone else, you win. • When it comes to monetary things, you believe "you can't take it with you." • Selfish people turn you off. Regulatory - A need to establish order, routine and structure. This motivation is to promote a black and white mindset and a traditional approach to problems and challenges through standards, rules, and protocols to color within the lines. Based on your Motivators assessment Regulatory score: You believe there’s always another way when the current situation changes or roadblocks are apparent. • You'll likely do things "by the book," but it's your book. • You will more or less march to the beat of your own drum. • You probably don't appreciate being told what to do or handholding. • You're looking for freedom and autonomy in your work. Theoretical - The desire to uncover, discover, and recover the "truth.” This need to gain knowledge for knowledge sake is the result of an “itchy” brain. Rational thinking (frontal lobe), reasoning and problem solving are important to this dimension. This is all about the “need” to know why. Based on your Motivators assessment Theoretical score: You will tend to skip over information you consider unnecessary and will rely solely on what you already know. • You may find learning easier when you love the subject matter and may rebuff everything else. • You will not likely spend resources on continuing education. • You simply don't have a strong need to know what you don't know. • You won't likely appreciate learning for learning's sake as it may zap your energy -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Meaning: A General Overview of the Four DISC Styles The Dominant ‘D’ Style: look at my accomplishments! Goals and Fears Dominant ‘D’ Styles, driven by the inner need to lead and be in personal control, take charge of people and situations so they can reach their goals. Since their key need is achieving, they seek no-nonsense, bottom line results. Their motto is: "Lead, follow, or get out of the way." They want to win, so they may challenge people or rules. Similarly, Dominant ‘D’ Styles also accept challenges, take authority, and go head first into solving problems. Closely related to Dominant ‘D’ Styles' goals are their fears: falling into a routine, being taken advantage of, and looking "soft". So, they may go to extremes to prevent those fears from materializing. They may act impatient, but they make things happen. "Do as I say" Since Dominant ‘D’ Styles need to have control, they like to take the lead in both business and social settings. As natural renegades, they want to satisfy their need for autonomy. They want things done their way or no way at all. Strengths and weaknesses They work quickly and impressively by themselves. They try to shape their environments to overcome obstacles en route to their accomplishments. They seek maximum freedom to manage themselves and others, using their leadership skills to become winners. They often have good administration and delegation skills. These assertive types tend to appear cool, independent, and competitive. They opt for measurable results, including their own personal worth, as determined by individual track records. Of all the types, they like and initiate changes the most. We symbolize this personality type with a lion--a leader, an authority. At least, they may, at least, have the inner desires to be #1, the star, or the chief. Less positive Dominant ‘D’ Style components include stubbornness, impatience, and toughness. Naturally preferring to take control of others, they may have a low tolerance for the feelings, attitudes, and "inadequacies" of co-workers, subordinates, friends, families, and romantic interests. From general to specific Dominant ‘D’ Styles process data conceptually by using deductive reasoning--from general to specific information. They are more comfortable using the left brain more than the right. When combined with their need for control, this helps us better understand the emphasis on getting down to the bottom-line results. Masters of "mind control" They are adept at blocking out distractions when they immerse themselves in projects. They don't hear voices, sirens, or doorbells. They seem to channel all their energies into specific jobs. Venting relieves their tension Under pressure, Dominant ‘D’ Styles are likely to rid themselves of anger by ranting, raving, or challenging others. They naturally react to tense situations with a fight response. Although this venting allows the relief of their own inner tensions, other styles may feel intimidated by this stress reducing practice. But the Dominant ‘D’ Styles' barks usually exceed their bites, and they may soon forget what specifically upset them in the first place. ---------- The Interacting ‘I’ Style: hey, look at me! Outgoing, Supporting, Interacting ‘I’ Styles Interacting ‘I’ Styles like to go where the action is. Typically, they are outwardly energetic or fast-paced, and relationships tend to naturally take priority over tasks. They try to influence others in an optimistic, friendly way focused on positive outcomes, whether in the social or work environment. In other words, if they show others that they like them, they figure others will be more likely to reciprocate by responding favorably towards them. Since recognition and approval motivate him, he often moves in and around the limelight and hub of activity. Goals and Fears He wants your admiration and thrives on acknowledgment, compliments, and applause. "It's not just whether you win or lose. . .it's how you look when you play the game." People's admiration and acceptance typically mean more to this type than to any other. If you don't talk about him, he may spend considerable time talking about his favorite subject--himself--to gain the acceptance he wants. His biggest fear is public humiliation--whether appearing uninvolved, unattractive, unsuccessful, or unacceptable to others. These frightening forms of social rejection threaten the Interacting ‘I’ Style's core need for approval. Consequently, he may go to extremes to avoid public humiliation, lack of inclusion, or loss of social recognition. Strengths and weaknesses Interacting ‘I’ Styles' primary strengths are their enthusiasm, persuasiveness, and friendliness. They are idea people who have the ability to get others caught up in their dreams. With great persuasion, they influence others and shape their environments by building alliances to accomplish results. Then they seek nods and comments of approval and recognition for those results. If compliments don't come, Interacting ‘I’ Styles may invent their own. "Well, Harry, I just feel like patting myself on the back today for a job well done!" They are stimulating, talkative, and communicative. This type can be represented by a porpoise--playful, sociable, and talkative. Their natural weaknesses are too much involvement, impatience, being alone, and short attention spans. This causes them to become easily bored. When a little data comes in, Interacting ‘I’ Styles tend to make sweeping generalizations. They may not check everything out, assuming someone else will do it or procrastinating because redoing something just isn't exciting enough. When Interacting ‘I’ Styles feel they don't have enough stimulation and involvement, they get bored and look for something new again. . .and again. . .and again. When taken to an extreme, their behaviors can be seen as superficial, haphazard, erratic, and overly emotional. "Let me entertain you!" If they pursue the entertainment field for careers, Interacting ‘I’ Styles typically allow their natural, animated emotions to show and flow. They become stimulated by the movement and reactions of the audience, trying to get the audience to figuratively fall in love with them by acting charming and friendly. They want viewers to feel, "He (or she) is fabulous!" --------------- The Steady ‘S’ Style: notice how well-liked I am Goals and fears Steady ‘S’ Styles seek your sincere personal attention and acceptance of them. Steadiness and follow-through actions characterize these people. They prefer a slower and easier pace. They focus on building trust and getting acquainted because they aim for long-standing personal relationships. Pushy, aggressive behavior secretly irritates them. They strive for security. Their goal is to maintain the stability they prefer in a more constant environment. To Steady ‘S’ Styles, while the unknown may be an intriguing concept, they prefer to stick with what they already know and have experienced. "Risk" is an ugly word to them. They favor more measured actions, like keeping things as they have been and are, even if the present situation happens to be unpleasant due to their fear of change and disorganization. Consequently, any disruption in their routine patterns can cause distress in them. A general worry is that the unknown may be even more unpleasant than the present. They need to think and plan for changes. Finding the elements of sameness within those changes can help minimize their stress to cope with such demands. Strengths and weaknesses Steady ‘S’ Styles naturally "wear well" and are an easy type to get along with. They prefer stable relationships which don't jeopardize anyone, especially themselves. Steady ‘S’ Styles can be represented by the koala with its accompanying slower, steady pace; relaxed disposition; and appearance of approachability and warmth. Steady ‘S’ Styles have a tendency to plan and follow through. This helps them to routinely plug along. But they have their own type of unique difficulties with speaking up, seeming to go along with others or conditions, while inwardly, they may or may not agree. More assertive types might take advantage of this Steady ‘S’ Style tendency to give in and avoid confrontation. Additionally, Steady ‘S’ Styles' reluctance to express themselves can result in hurt feelings. But if Steady ‘S’ Styles don't explain their feelings, others may never know. Their lack of assertiveness can take a toll on this type's health and well-being. Take it slow Steady ‘S’ Styles yearn for more tranquility and security in their lives than the other three types. They often act pleasant and cooperative, but seldom incorporate emotional extremes such as rage and euphoria in their behavioral repertoire. Unlike Interacting ‘I’ Styles, Steady ‘S’ Styles usually experience less dramatic or frequently-occurring peaks and valleys to their more moderate emotional state. This reflects their natural need for composure, stability, and balance. "Just plain folks" Steady ‘S’ Styles lend a tone of continuity, coziness, and project a genuine liking and acceptance of others. They are comfortable people to watch and listen to who emanate that "I'm just a regular person" modesty. They put on no airs and project contentment with present conditions--just as they are and always have been. ------------------------- The Conscientious ‘C’ Style: notice my efficiency Goals and fears Conscientious ‘C’ Styles concern themselves more with content than with congratulations. They prefer involvement with the performance of products and services under specific, and preferably controlled, conditions so the process and the results can be correct. Since their primary concern is accuracy, human emotions may take a back seat with them. Their biggest fears of uncontrolled emotions and irrational acts relate to their fear that these illogical acts may prevent goal achievement. Similarly, they fear emotionality and irrationality in others. They strive to avoid embarrassment, so they attempt to control both themselves and their emotions. Strengths and weaknesses Conscientious ‘C’ Style strengths include accuracy, dependability, independence, clarification and testing skills, follow-through, and organization. They often focus on expectations (e.g., policies, practices, and procedures) and outcomes. They want to know how things work so they can evaluate how correctly they function. Conscientious ‘C’ Styles can be cagey, resourceful, and careful. Because they need to be right, they prefer checking processes themselves. This tendency toward perfectionism, taken to an extreme, can result in "paralysis by over analysis". These overly cautious traits may result in worry that the process isn't progressing right, which further promotes their tendency to behave in a more critical, detached way. Complex and serious They prefer tasks over people, clearly defined priorities, and a known pace which is agreeable to them, especially where task timelines and deadlines are involved. Other types typically live life through a single predominant time orientation--past, present, or future. But Conscientious ‘C’ Styles are apt to be concerned about all three, as one aspect of their complex mental makeup. They tend to see the serious, more complicated sides of situations as well as the lighter--or even bizarre side--which accounts for their natural mental wit. Conscientious ‘C’ Styles concentrate on making decisions in both logical and cautious ways to ensure that they take the best available action. Think deeply Due to compliance to their own personal standards, they demand a lot from themselves and others and may succumb to overly critical tendencies. But Conscientious ‘C’ Styles often keep their criticisms to themselves, hesitating to tell people what they think is deficient. They typically share information, both positive and negative, only on a "need to know" basis when they are assured that there will be no negative consequences for themselves. When Conscientious ‘C’ Styles quietly hold their ground, they do so as a direct result of their proven knowledge of facts and details or their evaluation that others will tend to react less assertively. So, they can be assertive when they perceive they're in control of a relationship or their environment. Having determined the specific risks, margins of error, and other variables which significantly influence the desired results, they will take action.

https://discpersonalitytesting.com/free-disc-test/

A FREE DISC PERSONALITY TEST

GAIN INSIGHTS TO BUILD BETTER, STRONGER, MORE FULFILLING RELATIONSHIPS

Use this Free DISC Personality Test to get a fast estimate of your DISC profile based on answers to 12 short questions. It's fast and it's free. You can probably finish it in less than 10 minutes. Use the results to gain insights you can use to better understand why you communicate the way you do and how you can communicate with others more effectively. With your results, you can:

Immediately improve interpersonal communications

Connect with co-workers more effectively

Understand what you need to be most successful

When you click on the button below to open the free DISC assessment window, you'll be on your way to learning more about your DISC personality style. It’s that fast and that easy. After you complete the Free DISC Personality Test, you will immediately receive insights and tips about your personal style.

6 Human Needs - SF Walker

 Everyone experiences the same six human needs, however we all find different ways of satisfying these needs.

They can be met in ways that are positive and constructive or negative and destructive.

Six Human Needs Test (sfwalker.com)

What do they mean?

First three are the needs of the BODY. Adding LOVE, makes the first four, needs of the PERSONALITY and these four are essential to human survival.

Everyone must feel they have met these human needs on some level, even if that means being dishonest with one self in order to do satisfy the need. The last two are essential to human fulfillment and they are the needs of the SPIRIT.

Not everyone finds a way to satisfy last two even though they are necessary for lasting fulfillment. When our needs for contribution, growth and love are satisfied, they tend to encompass all our other needs.

Why are six human needs so important to understand?

It is important to understand they are not goals nor merely desires, but profound needs that underlie and motivate every choice, every belief and every decision we make.

Because they are the driving force behind any person’s behavior, understanding the needs and the vehicles used to meet them, we will have a better understanding of why life is the way it is currently and more importantly, how to facilitate change.

There is a test to be taken in the link to understand this:

Focus, meaning and physiology are essential to understanding individual motivation, as there are four stages to spiritual or moral development:

1. the need to dominate and control

2. the need to be loved

3. the need to love and protect others

4. the need to repent and to forgive

FIND OUT NOW

If you really connect with the statement and it truly describes you and how you feel, please choose YES.

If the statement partly describes how you are, its not a 100% yes, but its neither a complete no, please choose PARTLY.

If the statement makes you feel this is probably not how I am, please choose NO.

There is a total of 6 sections and the test will take 5-10 minutes to complete. Don’t overthink it and remember to HAVE FUN!

Write down what you think your need is before taking the test and than see what happens after you take it.

You get an email saying:

THANK YOU for taking the time to complete the 6 Human Needs Test. Please follow the link at the bottom of this email to get to your designated personal 6 Human Needs page, containing your results with detailed explanation. Will your expectations be met or will you be surprised? How well do you know your Self? Over the next 3 days, I will be sharing valuable resources I have created that will support you on this road of becoming the greatest version of your Self. This will help you learn, understand, accept and manage your own life in order to become Self Actualized. You can control what you think and what you feel. Practice is all that is needed. Be on the lookout for an emailed titled "Ch. 1 of 3: Took the test, whats next?" Just in case this email somehow is placed into your promotions or spam folder you can take these simple steps to move it to your primary folder: 1. Click on the "Promotions" tab to find the message 2. Click and drag it to the "Primary" tab 3. You'll be  asked if you want future messages from this email to go to "Primary"; click "Yes" In today’s fast paced world, more often than not we forget some simple, yet ultimate truths that make our life, and lives of those around us, so much better. I am here to remind people to slow down, to reduce the noise, to listen.

Love&Respect

Igor - SF Walker
International Best Selling Author
http://www.sfwalker.com/mystory
415.967.2131

Took the test? What next? - Chapter 1 of 3: So what is Strategic Intervention anyway? S.I. is a project created with a goal of identifying the most effective methods needed in order to improve everyday life. To improve performance and in order to accomplish individual change or change in group culture, through communication, raising awareness and strategic planning. Strategic Intervention accomplishes this by connecting the most effective ways of communication and strategies from disciplines like: Ericksonian psychology, strategic family therapy, human needs psychology, organizational psychology, neurolinguistic programing, psychology of influence, tradition of diplomacy and negotiations and other strategic studies.

Chapter 2 of 3

Knowledge is power, they say. I say, NOT REALLY. Knowledge is nothing more than information. 

APPLIED KNOWLEDGE, now that is power. 

 

A famous quote sums it up well: “Knowledge is knowing what to say. Wisdom is knowing when to say it.” Knowledge relates to facts that you have learned; wisdom is the ability to put that knowledge to good use.

The energy of knowledge when used and combined with the the power of emotion, you are moved into action and you transform that energy into wisdom. Now you actually felt it, big difference. This where awareness of the Emotional Intelligence enters.

Using this knowledge we can answer some of these basic questions we all have on our minds and become more wise:

Who am I?

Who do I want to be?

What will I do to get there?

How can I give back?

How will I help myself and how will I help others?

How do I realign with my CORE being?

What is it that I am supposed to do?

What is my gift to the world?

How do I wake up the amazing, beautiful, creative child inside of me and create a new world?

Better world for myself and everyone else that rewards me with sharing their time and space with me.

Today, the right questions and knowledge. Tomorrow, wisdom and results.

Chapter 3 of 3

WE CAN BE joyful, happy, healthy, curious, loving, kind souls, we always actually were!

WE CAN BE growing and contributing beyond ourselves!

WE WILL GET RESULTS BY:

- going deep inside.

- searching for the light within our own darkness.

- shifting the ways of thinking.

- taking responsibility and looking into the mirror instead of blaming the world.

- discovering what the driving forces behind everything we do are.

- reconnecting with core.

- working with mentors.

 We will discover how do we operate, the body, the mind, the soul.

It is time to get absolutely clear on one key distinction in life:

I am driving or I am being driven?

This is the time to learn how to program this amazing tool inside of our heads, guide it from our hearts and act from our guts.

We can use our minds and to be guided by our souls.

We can do this by doing work.

It is time to re-evaluate values, beliefs, habits, memories, experiences. Time to decide which ones stay and which ones finally do get replaced with something that serves better!

INSIDE OUT.

Unparalleled Growth through Branding - Neeraj Singh Rathore

Unparalleled Growth through  Branding - Neeraj Singh Rathore  was my 60th of 2021. This book provides:

1. The core understanding of branding
2. The Significance of Branding in today's world
3. Branches of Branding tree
4. Business Branding - The new age rule for business
5. Brand management - The core component of the...
6. Advantages and Disadvantages of Branding
7. Right strategy to Design brand identity
8. Branding Strategy - An approach to build your dream brand
9. How to Brand yourself? - Branding Strategy and implementation
10. Career Branding
11. Constructive Idea of Branding through third part channel

A brand is an emotional connection between the consumer and your business or company. It is what sets apart, one business from its competitors. It is a sellers promise to deliver quality products and services to meet buyers expectation.

Common factors and attributes of branding:

• Relevance
• Consistency
• Positioning
• Sustainable
• Creditability
• Inspirational
• Uniqueness
• Appealing

Brand Positioning is nothing but an activity of designing a brand offer in such a way that it captures a special place and value in the target  customer’s mind. Example, Google ranks itself in the users’ mind as one of the trusted search engines which can provide customized and one-stop solution for all their search and needs. The positioning you choose for your brand is shaped by the competitive perspective you want to implement.

Brand Identity comes from how the brand is positioned. It becomes the face of your business, creating credibility and trust, generating new customers and delighting the existing ones. It is your company's mission . Brand identity is the noticeable component of a brand, including color, design, and logo, that differentiate and ascertain the brand in consumers' minds.

Brand Image is reflection of what people think of your brand. It is the set of perceptions that the customer have in mind about a particular brand. 

Brand Promise is the responsibility that the brand should perform.

Branding not only generates loyal customers, but also generates loyal employees. A quality brand gives people a reason to believe in and to stand for. It motivates the employees to fulfill the mission of the organization. They feel their contribution is significant in the company.

The variety of branding are:

• Service branding
• Personal brand
• Product brand
• Activist brand
• NGO brand
• Public brand
• Luxury brand
• Value brand
• Innovative brand
• Organization brand
• Group brands
• Geographic brands
• E-brands
• Celebrity brand
• Generic brand
• Employer brand
• Disruptive brand
• Event brand
• Investor brand
• Global brand

Personal branding: Will help you go to the next level. It matters. For it 

• Start from inside
• Evoke the right emotion
• Create the right experience
• Be consistent

How can you become a brand? 

To become a brand, you should understand your strengths and weakness.

 Figure out what is that one thing you are good at.

 What makes you different from your colleagues or peers?

 Now invest on that one skill, it maybe you are a smooth talker or really good MS excel or coding

 Having done working with it, implement this, keep on exhibiting people through your work ethics and your actions, that’s the reason you are better at that particular skill than others. Let your 

work speak for you.

 Once people start noticing this, your value will multiply, in your office or at your home or anywhere else.

 Slowly but surely, you will land yourself as a brand. People will enthusiastically pay you more to avail of your services. Branding is an emotional reaction or feeling stimulated from a person's experiences, both positive and negative when a person hears or sees your brand.

Brand management is the advancement of brand perception in the market. This comprises all the physical elements of a brand. Brand management is a significant facet of marketing and enhances the value of a product. It builds loyal customers by using brand confirmations with images or key messaging.

Two primary things a strong business brand should work to build Identification and customer loyalty.

Career Branding:

THE SKILLS GAP: Skill gap is a crucial issue in this century. As the technology advances, more skills are in vogue. You may have skills, but are they relevant ones in this age? Ask yourself how to know more? How to have more? As the technology advances, more skills are in vogue. With Globalization, Automation, Average being over, we need to brush ourselves up. 

Hard Skills: Hard skills stand for the practical skills. The technical skills you must mention in your resume. If you fulfill the requirements of the job descriptions, you are almost done for your dream job. Without them, you are not going to get even as mere as an interview call. If you do have any certifications or award of these skills, don’t take time to show them.When creating your personal brand, ensure your positioning in search engines like google. Search yourself there to check appear them. Do you have any article posted? What comes first in search results? 

You must have the following written out somewhere:

 A clear template of your personal brand

 Short and long-term personal branding goals

 Your unique qualities, talents, areas of expertise

 Your achievements

Why Brands fail?

• Poor product
• Brand recall drops - 
• Too much extension with limited resources
• False marketing
• Increase in competition
• Service is not upto mark

Where are you within the company?

 

Copywriting by Neeraj Singh Rathore

 

 

What an amazing  session by Neeja Sing Rathore, which I was fortunate to attended from 3rd to 5th July 2021. It not only provided insight into what copywriting and Content writing is, but gave a bird's eve view on Digital Marketing, Brand Building etc. 

Day 1: 3rd July 2021

Copyrighting is just crafting words for the sole purpose of conversion. It is the foundation of selling. It is emotional, telling story. The purpose of Copywriting is for sale/conversion, with a goal to increase revenue, and the direction is Linear and Strategic. 

Content writing is just the information that you give out. The purpose of content writing is Engagement/Brand Loyalty building. It is Multi-directional with the goal to increase likes, shares and comments. 

*10 Step Framework* - When you create sales pages or videos; remember the keys to have are:

1. Headline/Attraction Grabber - Grab attention
2. Problem - Set up + Solution 
3. Solution - Show results and benefits
4. Social Proof - Provide credentials and social proof    
5. Make your offer
6. Add Bonus/Stack Value
7. Reveal the price
8. Give a guarantee
9. Urgency - Inject Scarcity
10. CTA- Final Call to Action/Reminder

To Grab attention use words like:

Step 1: Grab Attention:

• • Who else want ....
• • The secret of ...
• • Here is the method....
• • Little known ways.....
• • What everybody ought to know......
• • The lazy dads way – 
• • Do you recognize....
• • See how easily....

 

How will I know if headline is good – understand the hack.

Use ‘Headline analyser

You don’t need a digital marketer – go to google and search -)  Canva.com : Download and post to social networking 

And then comes this message:

"Why are we always short of money. For many years I was not having enough money.

Whenever I used to take my wife out for a dinner, I would open the menu card, look on the right side and only order the cheapest item.

Why?

Because I did not have the cashflow, and there was not enough money in my bank to afford an expensive meal.

After going through a lot of personal development and learning from mentors, I realised that my lack of money was not the real problem.

It was only a symptom that was showing up.

The more I studied about this topic, I learned that there are 5 root causes reasons why people suffer from money problems:

If you think rich people are bad at the subconscious level, then you will not be able to attract money. You cannot attract what you despise. Even though consciously you may want to become rich, subconsciously you are repelling riches. Change this mindset first.

Poor money management is a root cause of being poor. If you cannot manage the small sums of money, how can the universe give you large sums of it? If a child cannot handle a single-scoop ice cream, the parent is never going to give a triple-scoop ice cream however much the child cries for it. That's how it works. You will be given more by God (or the universe), if you are able to be more responsible with what you already have.

Not "personally growing" is a root cause of being broke. If you are not willing to invest in your own personal growth and learning, how will you ever grow? You and your business will only grow to the extent that you do. If you are not investing in courses and training programs, you will remain stagnant at the same level. Don't be cheap on your journey to greatness. Invest in yourself. You are the best investment that you can make in.

Not having a mentor will keep you in a world of illusion. When you are on your own trying to figure things out by yourself, it's going to take you a very long time to achieve results through trial and error. Personally, I have wasted over 7 years of my life trying to figure things out on my own. Once I found my mentor and surrendered to his proven system, everything started to change. My income started to grow exponentially. This also has to do with EGO. People who have a big ego will not want mentors. They think they are too smart. And that's what keeps them broke.

Not developing new skills is also a root cause of not having money. You might have been successful 10 years ago, but if you are not adapting to the new world and building new skills, you will remain stagnant in your income. Constantly learning new skills and strategies is the key to sustainable growth in your income.

These are the 5 reasons why people remain broke and struggle.

But the good new is this...

You can change this, anytime.

All it takes is to make that one decision.

You need to be open.

You need to be willing to grow.

That's it.

I hope this made sense to you.

I truly want to help you become successful financially.

When more money comes in the hands of good people, more good can be done in this world.

Do not let your little fears inside stop you from contributing in a big way to this world.

Do not be a miser.

Think big.

Grow big.

I'm with you.

And I believe in you."

Another sales technique. 

Day 2: 4th July 2021

Coaching and sales are different. What is important is conversion process, It’s not about the lead (prospective client). Do what you do best, delegate the rest. 

Most commong mistake is only talking  about FAB – Feature, advantage, benefit.

A writer/coach/ and seller are different – selling is not about telling. 

If you need fruit, you will have to invest on the seed. 

Give away the books – you will create fan. Law of reciprocity. Give ebook worth  Rs. 700 and take Rs. 7,500 from audience.

·        Talk about your dreams, don’t let them down

·        Ebook is a lead magnet.

When writer thinks he wants to sell children's book who would be the target audience? The ultimate decision maker – example if you want to sell children's book , the parents need to feel the need to buy the book. 

Do we need paid marketing or organic? Do organic. Make sales funnel. Word of mouth is karma marketing. You cannot be relying on your karmas. Sales Navigator in linked in will help you get the leads.

How to create good video.

Have vision, and work towards it.  Untill you are willing to be visible how can you sell?

Onus of sale is never on a publisher, it is that of the author.

Duniya kha subse bhada rogh, khya kahenge log.

Go out, make claim. 

Build trust credibility and inspire action

People don’t buy the product, but they buy the outcome of your product.

6 P’s to be remembered: 

• • Problem – wired to avoid pain above gaining pleasure – I help (audience)------with (problem)
• • Pain – Problem is not the pain, it is the cause of the pain
• • Prescription- It is not the solution. Keep the A card with you. Hukum kha ekka apne pas rakho. Talk about the method, approach. Make people belive that you will get the solution. You will talk about the what and why and not how. 
• • Pivot – changing the perspective -whats your mission , reason or inspiration for creating the product.
• • Positioning – 
• • Product – make it better, simpler and faster, easier and cheaper

Good copy should appeal to the readers emotions, not the writers emotions. Evoke emotions that will make customers take desired actions. Instead of using exaggerated words like "overjoyed" and "amazing", use honest words like "exclusive", "One-time-only" ; by doing it you are tapping into their emotions, in a way that will lead them to take the desired action. 

Creative copy requires a lot of reading and writing, as well as an abandonment of rigid thinking. For example write 'Kool' and not 'Cool', be casual and engaging. Effective ways to engage reader's include the use of curiosity, secrets and story telling. Oldest known techniques for these are AIDA and TIPS.

AIDA is Attention, Interest, Desire and Action.

TIPS is Tempt, Influence, Persuade and Sell.

Story telling is another effective way to grab the attention of the readers, and the four elements of it are: the protagonist, the problem, the description of what happened and the solution. You may have the product, but it is the story, that will keep the readers emotionally invested. 

Example: Keyed, crashed and left to rot in the barn, The one man decided to do something amazing. 

How do you grow your business, a small example:

• Build your personal Brand - 
• Play to your inner strength – don’t copy - 
• Discover your why?
• Find your quite focus?
• Have a clear voice?
• Use your energy wisely

Confidence, curiosity, Credibility, Catalyst, commitment (culture) – commitment khar de tho upnie bhi nahi suntan.

If they like you, they will listen to you; if they trust you, they will buy from you.

If no one is listening to you , you have not created the brand. 

Get clients first, that is the key even before branding,

Email : Get the Business Break Through you need, Never sell, People don’t want to be sold, but they want to buy.  People do business with people. 

Every day end write:  www

• What went well 

• What went wrong

• What can be improved

30 days productivity planner

Improve the marketing funnel. Have a vision.

Create Videos:

7 tips for overcoming camera anxiety and grow your business 

• Just go to the Mirror and practise 
• Take a few deep breaths first and maybe jump and use affirmations 
• Minimize distractions while recording out your mobile away. 
• Slow down while talking, like talking to someone 
• Look directly at the camera like you connecting with each one of them. 
• Include the human moments and use emotions. 
• Don't take yourself too seriously, have fun doing it.

Another way of creating videos are:

Day 3: 5th July 2021

Own website, Blog monetize risk – hacking risk? Use account with less or no money. 

Basics of persuasive writing – over all 10 step process. 

Know the closing technique.

Trust yourself! – You do your part. It is not about what you say, but who you are, be who you are.

Books to read – Breakthrough Advertisment/Lead Magnet

When you see an ad.. what puts up the antenna is what it  appeal, attract, shareable.

How to get high network clients

The real success is how do you serve your clients. 80% internal communication, Internal will manifest external. Sub con mind. Set your goal. Strong reason to win....

Break the rules, unleash the power within. 

Never reveal the big sale until last.

Most dangerous letter in English – I know that. Empty your cup, when you want to learn.

Its about doing and not knowing. Have belief in yourself.  Freedom – Serve others.

Decide and then, Go and do it. 

Don't be the number one, be the only one.

Work on who and not what. It is the journey and not the destination that matter. At the highest income level, you do not get paid for what you do, but for who you are.

The best people at anything are generally the poorest. It's about being known or perceived as being the best. 

Make world smaller. It's all about demand and supply. Call for action. Know your client. Niches create riches. Selling is transfer of emotion.  You get more traction and leverage in selling when you use negative feelings than you do positive feelings.  Positive feelings are success, achievement, peace of mind, acceptance, admission, benefit, love, security, pride respect. 

Content Marketing Strategy:

Sales page checklist.

Concept of Copywriting:

Copywriting is the aspect of writing copies for the sole purpose of marketing and advertising. 

In broadcasting, marketing, and advertising, copywriters also create newsletters, online ads, inter-net content, press releases, catalogs, brochures, and other marketing material, TV and radio commercial scripts, and many more. 

Many copywriters are choosing to be independent, to freelance, because they are able to perform tasks such as editing, messaging, consulting, SEO consulting, proof reading, design and layout etc. 

Content writers work is to write a car ad to persuade a potential customer, while the work of a technical writer is to write about the operations of the car from the reading manual. 

As a copywriter, you get a chance to influence the masses by creating an ad or creative piece that remains on the mind of the viewer. 

What every beginner copywriter needs to know?

Creating compelling copies demand a sort of inside in-formation to what moves the masses or what builds up emotions in the specific target viewer or buyer.

To create compelling copies, you need to know your character to get a story that compel them. This is the first principle of copywriting. 

1. Your 'target' reader or your target want to feel important
2. Most Targets are insecure
3. Glimpsing into their past can give you clues and help you create better copies.
4. Conflict is the window into the true character of the target
5. How far are they willing to go

Remember

1. Your product is far less important than the needs of the customer
2. 80% of your copy should be in the second person voice.
3. K.I.S.S - Keep It Stupid Simple
4. Red pen rule - after completing your final copy, read it again and eliminate at least 30% of it. It makes you message compact, succinct and actionable.  
5. S.L.A.P. Rule - Stop, Listen or Look, Act and Purchase. Do not leave the call to action as a suggestion. Demand some action from the consumer by using compelling content and words. Figuratively speaking, your copy should slap the target into action. 

Define your success: Ask

• How much money, per month do you want to make from copywriting?
• How much free time do you require?
• How much hours per day will you work?
• Which field of copywriting excites you?
• Do you love telling stories or writing technically?

Pursue and aim to achieve the clients and consumers expectation. Do not give client instant expectation. Adhere to the rules of ethical freelancing. 

Today value addition drive the copywriting business. While clients look for the very best people who can add some value to them and their companies, giving each copies your best guarantees your readiness to challenge and shows the client your real value. 

Practise, Practise.

To show credibility, you need to give statistics. 

1. Figuring out what people want from your product is the first step. 
2. Targeting the right group of people is the most effective growth strategy for a start-up. 
3. The third step is about making your product go viral
4. The final step is to focus on improving your product to retain customers

• Product online contents that makes your company an information source and deepen your customer relation
• Find your brands voice and identify your audience and their needs
• Connect to customers by gathering and sharing information through a variety of social media
• Share your content every chance you get and make it easy for others to share it too.
• Set a calendar to systematically produce, monitor and repackage your content
• Metrics Matter: Set specific and measurable goals and be smart about keywords.
• Build unique contents for business customers to suit their special needs
• Finding  the true purpose the meaning of your work will help you feel motivated and aliv
• Selling with noble purpose means focusing on customer needs, which can also generate profit.
• Scary bosses are not good for business, as fear takes the focus away from customer needs
• An honest sales pitch can't be faked, so it's best to sell products that are truly helpful. 
• Creating engaging stories about your company is crucial for motivation and sales.
• A good customer relationship management will improve sales, more than a good supervisor. 
• It's important to collect detailed information on successful sales and share it with everyone.
• Simple rules can keep employees motivated and engaged, which always makes work more enjoyable. 

Top of Mind:

• Traditional "Me" marketing has given over to the new strategies of "You" Marketing, which are based on trust and value. 
• You can stay relevant to the concerns of your customers by using content triggers and a knowledge bank.
• Help form a trusting bond with clients by presenting a like able and transparent brand.
• To stay relevant, helpful and trustworthy, be consistent with your content and take advantage of the networking opportunities. 
• To stand out and connect with customers, give your brand a strong purpose and allow all employees to share the company message. 

What's important is negotiation and closure:

Sales Funnel

It's about you and not about the product:

Keep going. Remember the sales funnel.

1. Qualify the lead
2. Invite customer into a story
3. Repeat your pointers - hero story
4. Create proposal and sale

Do not fear rejection, call your customer to action with confidence. 

Think big, start small, start it now.

Niche, clarity, blue print

People buy outcome

When the why becomes big enough, how becomes easy.

Stop being okay, by not being okay

Identify your personality and trait.

7 Words That Can Elevate Your Copywriting Immediately, budding Copywriters make the best use of it. All the best !!!!

And How Best to Use Them in Every Situation

The most successful copywriters tap into the emotion of their readers.

As we always say at  copywriting and sales are all about psychology. The words are important, but the emotions they create are what lead to conversions and sales.

And it doesn’t matter what niche you’re targeting. Emotion should be used to hook the reader.

Here are 7 words and themes to immediately use in your copywriting to boost clicks, conversions, and sales...

#7 - Anticipation 

Anticipation is one of the strongest emotions that a copywriter can wield. 

Anytime there’s a big product launch or big event upcoming, you’ll likely see ads that build up anticipation. Check your email inbox after reading this and you’ll probably see dozens of emails that create anticipation. 

When to use it: This is perfect when trying to build excitement before an event or product launch. 

Words to use: coming soon, announcing, amazing, sensational, revolutionary, offer, upcoming, get ready, secret, limited release, soon, save the date.

#6 - Kindness

Kindness is not the most actionable emotion you can use, but it is great for community building. It’s also good for instilling positivity into your audience and empowering them.

It’s best used when inviting audience members to join you in groups, or at upcoming events.

When to use it: kindness is a good emotion to use when you want to bring people together or make them feel like they belong.

Words to use: you, us, peace, together, all of us, neighborly, caring, courteous, respectful, hospitable, acceptance, appreciation.

#5 - Fear

It might seem negative to tap into fear, but this can be a very powerful emotion for copywriters to use. However, it is best used sparingly and carefully. Some platforms like Facebook have cracked down on ads that push fear too heavily. 

Fear is best used as a warning. Some of the most famous fear-based copywriting is seen in anti-smoking ads or in other health, nutrition, or fitness ads.

Remember, when using this emotion, always let the user know that you have a solution to the problem. Otherwise you’re just scaring people, and that doesn’t help anyone!

When to use it: When you want to warn your audience about a serious threat. 

Words to use: worry, anxiety, concern, mistake, doubt, warning, danger, looming.

#4 - Love

If you’re in the dating/relationship niche, love is one of the emotions you’ll tap into frequently.

Whether we’re talking about marriage or improving other relationships in our lives, people are always going to want to bring more love into their lives. 

When to use it: Appealing to your audience’s sense of love is great for anything relationship-based.

Words to use: love, relationship, happiness, marriage, dating, forever, eternity, adore, cherish, lifetime, by my side, need, unconditional, eternal, admire, acceptance, beauty, attraction.

#3 - Anger

This is another one to use carefully and sparingly. Like fear, ad networks like Facebook can shut down your account if you’re creating content that’s salacious.

Anger is best used when trying to rally people behind a cause. If you’re just trying to sell a product or service, you may want to avoid this one. 

When to use it: Anger is useful when your goal is to garner support for a cause or get people to share content.

Words to use: ordeal, scandal, shocking, corrupt, offensive, inconsiderate, malicious, spiteful, unjustified.

#2 - Envy

This is one of the most common emotions you see in copywriting.

Internet marketers love to show off their wealth and possessions because it makes their audience envious. 

To use envy effectively, you can explain how your products and services may have a similar impact. Of course, the product needs to deliver!

When to use it: Appealing to envy is powerful when your product acts as a status symbol.

Words to use: wealth, freedom, rich, make money, get out of debt, unlimited, limitless, infinite, get what you want, like me, abundance, power, travel, influential.

#1 - Friendship

Friendship is absolutely one of the top emotions to tap into as a copywriter. Like kindness, it’s best used when trying to build community. 

Use friendship when you want to associate a positive image and community with your brand.

When to use it: Appeals to friendship are good when your goal is to make people feel that you’re bringing them together in a positive way.

Words to use: community, join, become a member, mutual, we, together, commitment, consistent, common, society, safety, neighborhood, civil, devotion, inseparable.

Note: A copyright protects one's art, inventions, or ideas, whereas a copywriter creates advertorial content. ... To avoid confusion in the future—if you're ever in the position to describe what a copywriter does, say “they write copy,” not “they copywrite.” When I began the session, I did not know even this. And in three days, so much was covered. 

Love and Heartbreak

 Don't fear, have courage,

Move with passion and speed.

Every time you succumb to psychological pressure

You fail. And Leaders should not.

Each of you is an undiscovered treasure.

Discover yourself!

Be a change maker. 

To Love, you need to learn to rise above hurt. 

Awakening happen in the mind of young. As you grow older, you convert your vision into reality.  Work with enlightened consciousness. Be a change maker. Free of the tyranny of the conflicted mind, be a start. 

1) How do we know we are in love and its not infatuation?

In the spectrum of romantic relationship there are four levels:

• Crush - you feel nice staying around someone sweet and kind, it passes away with time, there is no bond.
• Infatuation - You begin to become obsessed abut someone, and you want them to think of you. Lot of chemistry and neediness get engaged. You get infatuated, when you are low, and someone gives you an attention. Through out your life you will fall in and out of infatuation. Your eye become bigger and bigger. It's a pleasure you derive by the thought of how you are important to each other. If it is not reciprocated, it hurts and there is lot of hate
• Discovering heart felt connection - Only with it, nurturing relationship begin. You feel the others joy, sorrow and anxiety. You are sensitive. Heartfelt connection is felt. This is not just with romantic partner, but with your parents, siblings and others as well.
• Love is an enlightened consciousness. Free to be more than the now, and other person looks like a miracle, not because they have no flaws, but it's because of your sense of preciousness. You could feel this when you observe a homeless person, when you sit under an old tree.

See where you are, and understand. For this Love is beyond the ordinary conflict in mind. If you do not know how to love, you have not lived at all.

2) Heartbreak to peace.

All separation is painful. If a person had meant something to you, to separate from the person is painful. It will hurt, because you will miss the person. Separation at some level, is like death. In your body, and in you heart, you know that person is not going to be part of your life. That beautiful relation ship is gone. So it hurts. How long can we grieve? There is no specific time period. If you can, you should not be in pain for even an hour. You just pay attention to the conflict you are going through. The regret and all the thoughts. In that observation your will realize, your love, your obsession was emotional dependence on each other. So you decide to end. Set out on a quest, to become a greater human being, though love which is enlightment. 

3) One sided love. 

 

Be conscious before your use the term unconditional love. Love that is forced upon another is not love, it is violence. This is bitterns and possessiveness. It is only going to damage you. You cannot win anyone's love from such a state.  Become free and it will happen.

4) Scar from the heartbreak. 

Heartbreak is painful. It is as real, as a physical wound in the body. If you keep scar in the heart, you should set yourself free. Merge with self love, respect and peace within you. Then you will attract the right kind of person in your life. 

5) How exactly to get out of the pain of heartbreak?

Heart cant heal by trying to forgive, forget or apologies. According to Japanese tradition, when the traditional pottery is broken, they add liquid gold , Pot looks much more beautiful.  Your actions and contribution to the world, determine your worth, not how others treat you. , if you do it from your heart, practice kintsugi of the heart. Awaken the deeper love to yourself. Intimate relationship break, because you are not able to love yourself. Have respect. There will be judgements. Work of accepting and discovering love to oneself. 

Find peace and ease with yourself, until you do, every judgement, will put you down, there will be always fear.  Only in the state of self love, and when your heart heal, you will be able to love others. 

6) Why do people not understand friendship and think there is sexual or romantic relationship?

Current civilization is filled with  loneliness in the hurt and lust in the mind. People are deeply unhappy with their life. Life ahead is not clear. If you can let them see this, things will change. Love does not mean physicality. It is a small part . If it dominates, boredom is not far behind. So people fall in love and fall out of love. Relationship driven by loneliness and lust, will end with cracks in the heart. Get out of this crazy thought. 

Understand Love will happen in your life, separation too will happen. Coming together will happen. This is the river of life. You will meet many wonderful people, some will drop out, and new people will join. Let go of anger and hate, and not hold a grudge and linger with heartbreak, if you understand this. 

Don't be stuck in the narrow arguments of everyday life. Grow everyday! 

The Pearl That Broke Its Shell - Nadia Hashimi

 

59th of 2021 was The Pearl That Broke Its Shell by Nadia Hashimi. Story of two women Rahima and her great-geat-grandmother Shekiba, in fact many women from Afghanistan. "It is up to you to find a way to make things easier for yourself" Shekiba's aunt tells her. 

Rahima says that Khala Shaima's story about Bibi Shekiba transformed her, this is indeed a novel about transformation. Rahima loves being bacha posh for the freedoms it brings. Being able to work in the market, play soccer, and go to school. The experience and the story  of her great great grandmother  was her inspiration.  Shekiba, the gift that could  be given away as easily as it had been accepted.

The word Naseeb or destiny, comes up often as each woman is repeatedly told that she much accept her fate. When Rahima asks Khala Shaima, "Wouldn't people say that is blasphemous?  To change the naseeb that Allah has for us?" her aunt responds, "....you tell me which of those people who say such a thing have spoken with Allah to know what the true naseeb is." Both of them have to deal with their husbands other wives. 

Earlier Afghanistan was eyed lasciviously by Russia and Britain. Each would take turns promising to protect the borders they had just invaded, like a pedophile who professes to love his victim. The borders between Afghanistan and India were drawn and redrawn from time to tome, as if only penciled in. People belonged to one country and then the other, nationalities changing as often as the direction of the wind. For Great Britain and the Soviet Union, Afghanistan was the playing field for their 'Great Game', the power struggle to control Central Asia. But the game was slowly coming to an end, the Afghan people fericiously resisting outside control. Chests expanded with pride when Afghans talked about their resilience. Then Taliban tried to attacked them, followed by America in the pretext of riding out Taliban.

Everyone has a purpose.  There are many forces at play. One has to tread carefully.  We are mice in a field of elephants  but if we are smart about our moves, we can save ourselves  from their heavy feet.

"The problem  is we have unrest within our borders and unrest at the borders. Our attention cannot lag or we will be weekend the two are linked a country secular in itself will stand strong against those who eye it hungrily and those who eye us know that troubles at home makes for easy prey.

There is some kiss we want with our whole body,

The touch of spirit on the body,

Seawater begs the pearl to break its shell,

And the lily, how passionately  it need some wild Darling,

At night, I open the window and ask the moon to come

And press its face against  mine. Breathe into me.

Benafsha was so mad in love, she would not give away the name of her lover even if it cost her  life. 

But sometimes  you have to act out of line, I suppose,  Some-times you have to take a chance if you want something  badly enough.

This life is difficult.  We lose fathers, brothers, mothers songbirds  and pieces of ourselves.  Whips strike the innocent, honors go to the guilty, and there is too much loneliness.  I would  be  a fool to pray for my children  to escape  all of that. Ask for too much and it might actually  turn out worse. But I can pray for small things,  like fertile fields,  a mother's love, a child's smile - a life that is less bitter than sweet.

Brotherly Love

Half of the 'New Year', is over;  lot of water has gone under the bridge. Nature felt its fury of 2020 failed to drive the point:

"Behold, how good and how pleasant it is

For brothers to dwell together in Unity!" Psalm 133:1 

Nature is still crying, in pain. Mankind is busy ignoring.

Believers have been raised to twist religious teachings for our convenience, and non believers use it bluff the believers. 

If all really understood and practiced it in the right sense, the world would be such a better place to be in. 

Another interesting thing is , it appears that human beings are born with a craving to fight with each other. At individual levels, family levels and group/country levels. But why?

Recent events in our building made me ponder about this. An executive committee was formed, as like every year and they nominated the PST - President Secretary and Treasurer. From day one, the executive committee did not want the PST to continue, and deemed them unfit. If so, why where they nominated? With the expectation that they would reject the roles? Some members from society had raised concerns about a couple of people from the executive committee. It was conveyed, that this would be investigated and necessary action taken. PST was blamed for this message too. The hate was cumulative, that just erupted with the events unfolding. 

Easy to say, forget and forgive, but difficult to practice. But not a surprise, when own brothers cannot stand each other after a point in time, how can others?

Just like every parents would like to see all her children united, happy and together always, so also mother nature, would like to see, all leaving in peace and harmony. 

But from time immoral, and even today, at all levels, we know this is not the fact. 

Weather it be:

• Rajiv and Sanjay Gandhi
• Mukesh and Anil Ambani
• Vijayaman and Sasiman
• Deepuman and Madhuman

As kids, all fight and patch up, what changes once we are grown up? Education, Finances or Wives?

This follows at family, state and country level.  

Marriages are made in Heaven - Fatema Desai

'Marriages are made in heaven'  by Fatima Desai  follows Hina, navigating her life the only way she knows. 58th of 2021.

Hina's life is full of half truths and sneaking around to just live her life. But this might just be Hina's biggest challenge yet, a marriage of convenience , even she might not be able to pull off just so she can finally get her happily ever after.

A Desi rom com. Hina lovable, but unpredictable the epitome of the 'good Indian girl' has done everything the way her parents wanted, except who she fell in love with. As a British Indian, Hina's hybrid cultures are at loggerheads and she can't find the right time to tell her parents about her secret lover Richard, without what she thinks will send them to their graves.

Enters the charismatic and charming Chetan 'the very Indian suitor' who may just have given her a solution to all her problems 'a fake marriage' and before she knows it Hina's knee deep in a web of lies. Chetan steadily grows on her and she starts questioning whether she should be with Richard at all. Can Hina pull off the deception of the century without losing sight of her goal? Chetan saves her from his plan. 

Parents were worried about the shame the dishonour. Cultural identity was too important a thing, it made them who they were, and she had spent her whole life pushing it away. Life's full of compromises right? Well if you are from a traditional Indian family and want to live your life the way you want to, it's not just compromises you have to make. 

A bit slow in the beginning but developed as we go further into the story,  the ending was a bit abrupt but enjoyed the book. A quick read.

'Notes on Grief' by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

“Gender matters. Men and Women experience the world differently. Gender colours the way we experience the world. But we can change that” – Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

This words from her, made me look out for her, and then got hooked to her and 'Notes on Grief' by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie became my 57th of 2021.

Regret is one of grief’s many tyrannies;⁣ thinking of what you could have done, thinking of what you didn't do. 

In the summer of 2020 when the Coronavirus pandemic had just begun, in a sudden turn of events, author-feminist Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie lost her father to unexpected kidney failure. In this slim yet moving book, Adichie remembers her father as she tries to express her grief and cope with her loss.

'Notes of Grief' was originally written as an essay of the same title in the New Yorker which was later expanded into a book. The book starts with Adichie recalling the early days of the pandemic when connecting with her parents, who lived in their family home in Nigeria, and siblings, living in different countries, over a Zoom call every weekend was a family ritual. Her father had mentioned about not feeling well in one of those videos, and just a few days later Adichie gets the devastating news that he is no more. While words fall short to express the loss of losing one's parent(s), in this book Adichie tries to share how the news shattered her. In the next few pages as she tries to make sense of her life-altering loss, Adichie fondly remembers her father James Nwoye Adichie-- from the days when he survived the Biafran war to how he became a statistics professor. She also writes about the days after his death, when the siblings connected over Zoom calls to discuss the inevitable rituals of death which got delayed because of the uncertainties of the pandemic.

"I am writing about my father in the past tense, and I cannot believe I am writing about my father in the past tense," Adichie writes in the book, as she tries to have a grip over her irreparable loss. While losing one's parent(s) is a very personal loss, each different from the other in its own way, readers who have experienced this grief or are going through it would find some solace in 'Notes of Grief'. This is a tribute to a father, by a self-proclaimed daddy's girl. Unfortunately, roughly a year later Adichie also lost her mother...

Walking in Clouds - Kavitha Yaga Buggana

Walking in Clouds - A Journey to Mount Kailash and Lake Manasarovar by Kavitha Yaga Buggana was my 56th of 2021; reminded me of my journey, and when Rashmi recommended this, could not resist. So here I go.

A Journey to a holy place can happen only if the traveler is called by the divine. So is the belief. So It materialized for the friends the author and her friend Pallu, and a third one Prarthana tagged in later. 

When you walk for hours and hours , your body become a thing you carry. Your bones drag you down, your muscles  are a series of stretching  and contracting aches. Daily she walks around 9 hours  while some finish the distance in 5 hours. It takes as long as it takes for each. 

Karnali is the longest river in Nepal and starts  in the Lake Manasarovar area and eventually  merge with the River Ganga in India.

This journey means something  different  to each of us. To Pallu and Kavita, it meant adventurer, the beauty.  To the pilgrims,  the journey itself,  is a walk in the shadows of God. 

For decades , this dream was an impossible  one for most Indians.  The Kailash area was closed to pilgrims  and visitors  1962 onwards. The ban reflected the worsening  relationship  between  India and China. In 1959, the chinese government  protested  the sanctuary India had given to the Fourteenth  Dalai Lama after he fled to India on account  of uprising  in  Lhasa. The area was re-open in 1980, just after the start of the Chinese economic reforms.  But permits were granted only to a limited  number of previous screened visitors. The batch of visitors  visited in 1981. 

The two main paths in the Buddhist world are the Theravada path and the Mahayana path. The Theravada path is practisd in Sri Lanka, Burma and other Southern Asian Countries. Based on the Pali canon of Buddha's teachings, Theravada is the stricter of the two and emphasises the goal of enlightenment and liberation from samsara or the material world. The Mahayana path is practiced in China, Japan and other northern Asian countries. Based on the Pali cannon, it also draws from other Buddhist  text which are composed mainly in Sanskrit. Mahayana emphasizes the attainment of the Bodhisattva state. Bodhisattvas are highly compassionate and spiritually evolved beings who delay their own enlightenment so they can help others. The Vajrayana path, a form of Mahayana the emphasises tantric practices, is prevalent in Tibet and the Himalayan region. The Yalbang monastery belongs to the Nyingma sect, which is the oldest of Vajrayana Buddhism. In Mahayana Buddhism, 'Om Mani Padme Hum.' these syllables encapsulate the essence of all the teachings of the Buddha. It points to the 'dependence on the practice of a path which is an indivisible union of method and wisdom; you can transform your impure body, speech and mind into the pure exalted body, speech and mind of Buddha. 

Tibet is the roof of the world. China is 2.5 hours ahead of Nepal. The word border bears such a strong meaning of separation, but when you are at the borderline the meaning seems to disappear, there is earth on both sides. 

Kailash is physically removed and structurally different from bother mountains standing out as if dipped in snow. While Mansarovar, the Lake of God's, is sacred, the water of Rakshas Tal are said to be poisonous. Mansarovar is depicted as a circular sun-lake and Rakshas Tal as a semi circular moon lake. Mansa means consciousness and Sarovar mean Lake.  Sun and moon, God's and Demons, sacred and poisonous sit side by side in the shadows of mount kailash. Rakshas Tal water it's salt water is so blue, it looks unnatural. To our right is the south face of mount kailash. Travellers must walk around the mountain in an elliptical path, like planets traversing around sun, Buddhist call this Kora,  Hindus call Pradakshina or parikrama. Both believe going around it, means going around the Universe, and it is the center of the physical and spiritual universe. Most Shiva temples are in the shape of Kailash and you cannot go round around it in full, and there is mostly pond near Shiva temple, symbolizing the Lake. 

Shiva has many aspects each denoting a certain quality or mood. As Sadashivs, his dance is benevolent and destroy illusion, so truth can be realised. As Neelakantha, he is the protector, one whose throat has been made blue by the poison he drank from the oceans in order to save the world. As the ancient pre aryan Rudra, he is the partron of good and bad, of kings and thieves. As the terrible Kala Bhairava, he roans cremation grounds and smears himself with the ashes of the dead until he turns blue and starts dancing frnzied and uncontrolled, burning everything so new things can come to be. As Kala Bhairava, he is the supreme destroyer, representing Kala (time), the greatest annihilator of all. In some versions Buddha Demchok of Kailash is said to be the Buddhist version of Kala Bhairava. Hindu worship different gods for different reason and all Gods for the same reason. 

In Chinese school History it is taught that Dalai Lama was troubling Tibetans, and they were happy to be rid of him, and wanted that. The monks were also soldiers. A war does not justify the destruction of an entire culture. The monastery was not only a place of worship, but also a centre for Tibetian cultural life, for its dance, music and art; for its community events and its literature. With the destruction of the monasteries, an entire way of life has been wiped out. After the cultural revolution, a generation of Tibetans grew up without learning their own language in school or their own history. A destruction of mental landscape as well. 

Now they are building roads, to reach Kailash. The travel would be much more easier. This is a land of contrasts. The geography is composed of endless desert of soil and rock on which the vast lakes of Rakshas Tal and Manasarovar are perched, like birds of paradise. Four rivers - the sutlej, the Brahmaputra, the Indus and the karnali - originate around here. A waterfall of melted ice cascades from an immense height. The Bon are the original inhabitants of Tibet. To them Kailash is an indestructible crystal mountain at the centre of the world. It is the place of their God, Shenrab. In prostrating themselves, they are worshipping the earth on which they walk. Every stone, every blade of grass, every insect on Kailash is sacred. 

Reality and truth are not always the same, they do not necessarily oppose or preclude one another. The myths of Shiva, the lake and the mountain, Buddhist stories and visualisations, the feeling of a mountain rising, none of these need be literal in order to be considered truthful. Such moments simply point to a truth as complex as the people who seek to understand them. 

Nothing in this world is eternal and everything is Transient.