Wednesday, February 21, 2024

Relationship with Narcissist


You build yourself. 

Be in a relationship that is more equal. 

In a relationship it is communication that is going to save the marriage. 

Communication of unexpressed emotions. 

They hurt you at places where you do not know how to reach and heal. 


System or routine, should be build in, we need to honor the other person's need. 

Nack to get people to bring to the topic of your interest, get the entry point, from the topic of their interest. 

Every marriage is different. 

Narcissist partners. 

Different people have different coping mechanisam to a fight. 

Kind of partner, is kind of coping mechanisam. 

700 days - marriage to narcisist will damage you. 

Ignore the game he is playing, it gives him control. 

Role of partner, when other is high, bring them down; when you are down they bring you up. 

If you are down in the dumb and they hurt you, you are with the wrong person. 

Go on a 700 day journey. 

Narcist will keep increasing the fire, damage. Their energy will keep pulling you down that will disturb you. 

Work your 700 days. 

Start building your life. 

Don't stay in the relationship and hammer yourself on why you are in it. Stop hammering yourself. It does more damage. 

Narcissists wont let you heal, or get back to your financial independence, drain you completely. 

700 days journey of financial independence. 

Narcissist loves control. You are his toy. 

Be powerful enough to manage your life in your way. 

Have 6 months of cusion before you leave out. 

Completely outgrow him. Days he suits him, he make promises, and day that dont suit him, he does not even remember having promised. 

This birth is your test to stand up for yourself. 

Am I:

  • feeling hurt, 
  • You just hurt me. 
Stay radical to catch them, and keep quite. 

Don't let the joke or insult pass. 

Silence is very uncomfortable for this person. 

Trust is build by the other person. 

Deal with your own insecurity. - 

Rethink and restructure, to get peace. 

Toby Robins,

"Behave the rest of your life how you were in the first month of your life. " 

Both being aggresive at same time will not work.

When emotions settle, you need to speak 'My dear, the way you speak', it does not work. '.

Seeding: Start with No, end with Yes depending on how persistent we are. 

Grow and fix yourself. Communicate more.

Magic happens when you get detached to the idea of fixing someone. 

Every body can give you only so much that they have. 

Majority of people are in relationship with you because they have an agenda with you, they are acquantances. 

Only 4-5 people are in relationship. 

For a perfectionist husband even the best is not enough. You will get enslaved in serving him. Choose what you want to be best in and what you dont want you to be. 

Don't get cluster phobic

Be mindful, or pay the price.

Be grateful for who you are and develop self. 

If you are not able to tell about the course, don't carry guilt. The day your spouse is able to handle the truth, it will come out. 

If you are focused on one another, you will be like a crab, trying to pull others down.

Both of you grow parallelly. 

Forgiving means dont want to carry poison

Apology accept You can deny trust. Let go. 

We eventually become the people we think about most. If we keep thinking about damaging people it will be a poison that will kill you. 

Estaperal - monogomy


Communication is important, for what you get from communication congratulations and get a chance.

But even after communicating if it does not happen, need to make right decision. 

Narcissist can be challenging, but understanding their behaviour will help. Understand their core,:

  • They crave for admiration and want to be known as superior
  • They charma and exploit others many a time, emotional manupulation
  • They struggle to understand your feelings. 

Your response

  • Set clear limits and intentions, communicate what you will and will not tolerate. Be assertive and calm. 
  • Become emotionally unresponsive like rocks. 
  • Focus on your self. Don't get drawn in their drama. 

Understanding does not excuse their behaviour. You deserve better. 

Set boundaries. 




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